Shahs of Sunset Recap: Trouble In Paradise

MJ and Tommy Selfie from upcoming Belize trip.

MJ and Tommy Selfie from upcoming Belize trip.

We are back in Belize, where the Shahs Resort by Bravo is apparently super far inland. Who goes to Belize without going to the beach? Yes, San Ignacio is pretty much on the border of Guatemala.

I am also appalled not just by Shervin’s aggressive behavior toward GG, but by the fact that none of the other men told him to back off. I guess when the other men are Mike and Reva that will not happen. But isn’t that Nima guy her cousin? Yes, yes he is.

The next morning, GG and Shervin get into it again. GG’s eyes are super dark. She has on eye shadow but is that eye shadow underneath too? Shervin’s confessionals show him saying he is trying to be a good friend to GG by telling her to cut back on her smoking and drinking since she is suffering from RA.  First of all, attacking her and screaming at her and acting like Reza’s little do boy is not the way to do that. He cannot be that stupid. He knows his script and he has no problem following it. Because, asshole. This is the guy that stood up for Mike on WWHL by lying and saying he didn’t cheat on Jessica.  He didn’t start a fight with Mike about his poor decisions. Somehow they manage to hug it out. For now.

Shahs Belize mike reza

Reza and Mike pause for a selfie with fans in Belize.

For the love of God, can Tommy just show up already? I am so tired these frantic phone calls.

In our first Reza confessional, he calls his good friend who has a terrible disease “Bitchface” several times and then laughs.

Finally, Tommy arrives. I’ve never been so happy to see him. MJ was ecstatic. Tommy wanted to stay home because his favorite team, the Mets were playing in the World Series.  He tells he that he loves her more than the Mets! This would be spectacular!  Here is why I don’t stay in relationships.  If you fly across the continent to see me and tell me that you decided to come because you love me more than the Mets,  the first thing I would do is Google to see when the games were played and if it was over. The Royals beat the Mets in the fifth match up on November 1, 2015 to clinch the series.

The shahs began filming the series in Belize on November 2, 2015. This is November 3, 2015. I would dump him for this. We might make up a few weeks later. But it’s all very black or white to me. He stayed behind to watch the World Series.

Finally, a producer corrects these people about saying they are on an island.

Reza, Mike, Shervin and Asa are relaxing at the resort when Reza announces that Jessica told him that Mike cheated on her. Mike says that Jessica is just believing what other people say and that she saw something on his phone she thought proved it and that is why  she’s dating the rapey guy now they are taking a little break.  The producers point out to Mike in his confessional that Jessica says he was unfaithful to her a lot.  He replies “These are all allegations. The entire world knows I’m married. I didn’t keep it a secret.”  Sherv seems to not believe Jessica. Reza and Asa know better. I heard that all of them froze Mike out when this happened in real life.

Asa and Reza stay behind for massages and MJ and Tommy stay behind for makeup sex. So of course Reza and Asa bust in on the lovers and try to pull their covers off.  Reza would also like to know if “white people fuck to Jewel.” UGH. MJ was videotaping their sex. Double UGH.  Asa wants to take naked photos of them for a book on naked couples she is making. Triple UGH.

Meanwhile, GG and the guys go on a hike that ends with some sort of tubing trip through the caves. I can’t with the bats. I love frogs though.

On the flight to Belize!

On the flight to Belize!

Reza and Asa are hellbent on exposing Mike for what he is done that they call Jessica and she tells then that she saw messages from one girl back and forth with Mike that were explicit and inappropriate spanning over a long period of time including after they were married.  It seems that he had a lengthy relationship with one of the girls. That would be in addition to all of the other chicks that were all over the Internet writing books and telling their stories. There was a falling out between Mike and the main players on this show after this revelation was revealed. And it was likely revealed long before this trip.

Reza confronts Mike one on one as soon as he returns. Mike says Jessica is lying. She’s not. Mike says Reza gets his thrills from schadenfreude.  Mike is furious that Reza is doing this on camera. He attempts to stop filming. He forgets that he is stilled wearing a microphone even though he is behind closed doors. He can be heard cussing and talking about how bad he fucked up. Mike storms off to Shervin’s  casita. As I watch Reza try to speed waddle after him like a three hundred pound 80 year old man, I am reminded that his reaction when he saw Tommy arrive was to mock his “big beer belly.”  Mike gets a cigarette and tries to run off for a private moment to smoke it away from the cameras, but production is not having that. He once again denies cheating on Jessica in his confessional saying, “I’m stupid, but I’m not that fucking stupid.”

Yes you are.

He eventually admits it to producers and Reza. He says, “This mistake was catastrophic.”

Somewhere, Mike Shouhed is shitfaced.


Filed under Asa Soltan Rahmati, Entertainment News, Golnesa Gharachedaghi, Mercedeh Javid, Mike Shouhed, Reza Farahan, Shahs of Sunset

42 responses to “Shahs of Sunset Recap: Trouble In Paradise

  1. Danny

    Mj’s feet are always dirty

    • Why ARE her feet always dirty? What in the hell is she walking on/in? And I wonder if she realizes how often her dirty feet appear on the show?

  2. Lol ~ I noticed that, too.

  3. Joanplus2dogs

    I’m so tired of hearing Mike talk about how he cannot participate or think while separated from the love of his life. If he truly felt that way, he shouldn’t treated his wife like that.

    • Monihew

      Unfortunately Joan I think some men just have no idea of how to treat a woman and Mike just might be one of those guys. He is clearly delusional and cannot be honest under any circumstances. He is still saying he only cheated once (while under his breath he is probably saying “that they know of”). He is so out of touch I really think he believes (at least during the taping) that he should have been forgiven. I think his biggest regret is probably related to the shame his family feels and has NOTHING to do with Jessica.

      • I am reminded of Reza’s father, a man who was a womanizer and cheated while married to Reza’s mother. Mike is just one of those man shores, he won’t change, even while married. He wasted five years of Jessica’s life!

    • kym

      He is immature and he isn’t succeeding as he thinks he should be. With that ego, he will never be faithful to his woman.

  4. Superfly

    Cheating on your wife is not a mistake Mike, it’s a choice. Happy she kicked him to the curb.

  5. Auntieaura

    Did anyone catch mike on WWHL? He is still in denial even though he admitted it lol will he ever learn???

  6. Minky

    Ugh! Why does Reza do that to GG? It’s so below the belt and unnecessary.

    BTW: Asa has the most incredible eyebrows ever. She looks like a Minoan goddess. Totally lovely.

  7. Reza is the master of being thoroughly nosey while pretending to have everyone’s best interests at heart. First, he has dinner with Jessica and gets part of the story of how Mike screwed around. Then, after Mike continues to deny that he cheated on his wife, he calls Jessica, supposedly to tell her he misses her in Belize and only went because he hoped she’d show up. Come on, Reza! You know you’re just like the rest of us and can’t stand not knowing what went on! Also, you’ve known Mike for years and know that, when his mouth is moving, he’s usually lying through his teeth. Jessica gives more details, which makes it clear that Mike had been cheating on her since their engagement. Mike gets thoroughly pissed off that his lies have been exposed, and goes off on Reza. Doesn’t take long for him to see that his lies can’t be explained away any more and he, kind of, comes clean. Too little, too late, you arrogant piece of cheating man-meat. Too bad you didn’t value Jessica this much when she was your wife. You thought you could have your cake and eat it too! Hate you and your lying ways. On a brighter note, it was lovely to see how happy MJ was when Tommy showed up. They’re obviously crazy about each other – hope MJ’s crazy, judgmental, bitch-mother doesn’t mess them up. I guess, from the mother’s point of view, MJ should marry a rich Persian, but the ones MJ is attracted to aren’t exactly growing on trees. Big laugh of the whole recap? Reza “waddling along like a 300 pound 80 year old man”, and then making fun of Tommy’s beer belly. So true!

    • Librarygirl

      You have it down Rose, especially regarding Reza’so catty ways. But, he considers himself to be the hub of this crew, so he persists. What bothered me most during this episode was MJ constantly trying to comb out that rat’s nest of a wig of hers, especially after it got wet. At one point Bobby was holding it down on one side while she tugged from the other. Yuk!

  8. Housewivedout

    Sometimes I wonder if Nima and Shervin are a closet item, or if Nima has the hots for him. That would explain why he doesn’t stick up for Golnessa and the fact that he’s been appearing in almost every episode despite not being a cast member.

    • Danny

      Bingo!! This would explain why at Asa’s event GG told Shervin he needs to look hard in the mirror. This would also explain why Shervin so easily jumped up and in GG’s face at dinner (normal guys don’t do this). Simply put, Shervin seems like a closet case to me.

    • tamaratattles

      Nima seemed to be staying in Shervin’s casita as well.

    • SB

      I thought Shervin was in the closet from the moment I first saw him. Also, the way Shervin told Nima to bring his drink at the end when they were chasing Mike around, struck me as a little odd for some reason. I immediately thought they might be an item.

  9. pocketbooklover

    I understand Tommy’s devotion to his team…It’s the World Series. If the Phillies were lucky enough to make it that far, I’d have my ass glued to the couch.

    • Shae

      As a lifelong met fan, I would never ask my boyfriend to miss the mets in the world series to come to some godforsaken hot/humid location with me lol That’s just not right.

  10. DJFL

    I think GG has really BAD dark circles around her eyes. It looked like she had two black eyes.

    • DJFL

      Maybe she’s been getting makeup tips from Yolanda.

    • Librarygirl

      I have rarely seen dark circles like that. She could have slept in her makeup though.

      • Shae

        I think it’s a combo of both, I’ve seen her with very dark circles before on the show and also with the smudged, morning-after makeup.

      • Susan

        She has admitted to bleaching under eyes because it’s a severe problem. I admire her honesty with admitting all work she’s done. Even lightened her gums.

  11. Tommy is my favorite out if this whole group! He’s a straight shooter with no filter,loud, funny and his down to earth directness is charming! Mike is a poser and a lying tool who got caught. I have zero sympathy for this delusional moron who more and more conveys how thirsty he is for attention and constant validation that he’s a sexy playa that all women crave. Ummmm sorry Mike, but NO. Your not. Keep up with that fantasy world you live in though. Seems to be workin for ya buddy…..

  12. Iprefermyteaunsweetend

    Asa is too good for this show. Mike is a lying POS. Who in their right mind would believe him? His friends know he cheated, they know it’s his nature! Why lie about it?

  13. Meri

    Mike has been friends with these people for a long time. They all know his personality and that he lies and cheats. So, why the sudden concern and judgmental behavior? They couldn’t stand Jessica so why take her side over Mike’s when they’ve known his character all along? He may be a POS, but he is their POS and they have no business getting involved in his situation and his marriage.
    Accept him for who and what he is or drop him for good. I guess that’s the current story-line so they have to play along. None of them are without baggage (especially Reza who I bet cheated on Adam a zillion times over the span of their relationship). I didn’t see Mike coming for Reza when he behaved badly toward Adam so what’s the deal?
    With friends like these you do NOT need enemies.
    Tommy is insane for continuing a relationship with the disgusting MJ. She is gross and not too different from her lovely mother in personality. Tommy will be eaten alive and spit out if he stays with MJ.
    Asa seems to be the most normal of the bunch so I’d fight to keep her friendship above all of the others. Shervin does seem a little lost around females and it surprises me that he went after GG who he was such good friends with. Ah, the Bravo magic at work. Attack, attack, attack and ask questions later.
    As always, Reza is a PIG.

    • Librarygirl

      I liked Sherv’s friendship with GG. What happened there? And, I am also confused at the group’s support of Jessica. Yes, she is right, but the crew can’t stand her. Why would they alienate Mike just because he is in the wrong? This group seems to hang together more than the other Bravo casts, I would have thought that they would have circled the wagons to protect Mike.

    • Janet

      I’m guessing they bugged Mike, this time about the cheating, because he’s married now, and his wife left him. I think Mike is addicted to social media and hook ups and affairs like a heroin addict, and won’t be able to stop it for anyone. Regular married life is too boring for him. Sadly, more and more people have this issue and cant put this behaviour down, when its a dunger tip away He thought he could still get away with it like he did before, or maybe thought he could quit. He cant. I like Tommy too. MJ is alot to handle, and I hope she won’t sabotage the relationship, as I have a feeling if she can’t make it with Tommy, she’s not going to be able to make it with anyone ever, and will allways be single. Which would be sad if that’s not what she wants. I’m afraid she may be relying on sex to keep him, and while that’s big, it can’t smoothe everything over in the long run, if she continues to have major issues and acts like her mom (who’s mean).

  14. SLM

    It wasn’t until last night that I started to think Nima and Shervin were a couple…not that there’s anything wrong with that. Just don’t treat us to anymore ridiculous made up outings of Sherv trying to pick up women.

  15. SLM

    Oh, and I was literally going brain dead from watching all of Mike’s crew, who CLEARLY HAVE ALWAYS KNOWN WHAT A…CHEATER, CHEATER PUMPKIN EATER…HE IS ALL PRETEND THEY HAD NO IDEA. Or Sherv with his ridiculously obvious lies that he “never saw Mike do anything.” I call BS on all of them!

    • Mike swore the wedding changed him, and maybe his friends wanted to believe him, so they did.

      Mike seems lost. WWHL was sad.

      I do hope Jessica finds happiness.

    • Janet

      That’s that dumb bro code, which I hate with a vengence. I think guys are so dirty with this, they’ll do most anything and sink to any low level, and break every moral code they have for themselves, to stick up for a male buddy, no matter how dispicable their friend is. I get being loyal to a friend, but it bugs me the lengths they’ll go to hurt other people over it, and to hang on to a person they don’t really respect or agree with.

    • alex1986

      I don’t understand how they all are “so surprised.” I thought GG said last year that her sister went with Mike to look at tuxedos for his wedding and they slept together that nite. They also know GG accused him of trying to sleep with her in Turkey but everyone’s shocked. Yeah right. If anything Jessica needs to pick up the phone and apologize to GG for calling her a liar. Even the beginning of this season Jessica made it clear she still didn’t believe GG.

  16. Kim

    We definitely are getting to know Shervin more this year. GG should, after seeing his fear of frogs, get a little payback using the little frogs (even fake rubber ones) somehow. I was waiting for him to scream like a little girl & jump up into someone’s arms. Hahaha!

    Nobody deserves to be cheated on but every time they bring Jessica up, I’m reminded Mike’s been accused of being unfaithful even before they got married & that was no secret. I think she just wanted to “be a wife” so badly (her words after they got engaged) & have that big wedding, she was in denial & maybe she thought he’d change. Cheaters rarely do.

    • librarygirl

      I agree Kim. Mike is a lying sack, and most probably will remain so. I feel terribly for Jessica. However, she was so over eager to please this man, so head over heels, that she completely changed herself for him. Plastic surgery is one thing. Converting to another religion is quite life changing. Did she fancy a happy ending like Charlotte on SATC? Or was she just hoping beyond hope that her choice was and trust in him was the real deal? I hope that she finds happiness, and starts looking for qualities in men that don’t involve flash and zero substance. The kicker here is that Mike is shown lapping up all of the love and attention that Jessica showered on him. And he is sad that it is gone. No regard for her unless he is backed into a corner, and I am not sure if I believe that either.

      • Janet

        I think he’s humiliated as well, because he failed at his marriage so quickly. His parents are probably livid and embarassed, and Mike seemed to want to please and impress them, that may have been a driving force to go along with the marriage in the first place. Mike is probably not marriage material for a very long time, if ever.

  17. Yaaa. Sad that Jessica knew and hoped Mike would change his ways after the wedding. That’s exactly what Princess Diana hoped would happen, but then reality smacked that hope down.

  18. Erika

    That “photo shoot” with MJ and Tommy was one of the most disgusting things I have ever seen. I find everything about MJ completely repulsive. Her make il is always overdone to the point of looking runny, her clothes are way too small, and I shudder every time her tits flop around because she refuses to adequately support them. And don’t even get me started on the wigs this season! At least Kim Zolciak brushed her plastic wigs!

Please Read the COMMENTING RULES before commenting.