The First Tomato Planting of 2016!




Traditionally, in the southern United States, the rule of thumb for planting vegetables is that no matter how nice the weather is, don’t ever plant until the day after Easter. I usually don’t listen to advice much, including this pearl of wisdom, but we’ve had so much rain and cold weather it just hasn’t been a good day for planting until last Friday which was a very busy blogging day. So I planted some today.

After last night’s blogging of hours of misogyny,  I needed to get out and enjoy the perfect weather today.  I had the best time wandering through the extensive flower and veggie displays outside Home Depot. Sadly, there was only one person working the register in the entire gardening department.  She also had to fetch the huge bag of potting soil for me while nearly a dozen people waited. It seems that they did not plan well for all of us who were so glad for a perfect sunny day that we all ran to Home Depot. I already want to go back tomorrow. I have a Home depot addiction.  Anyway on to what I planted today…

Ripe fresh tomatoes growing on the vine.


First I bought my cheat tomato plant. I try to buy only heirloom and/or organic tomatoes but I also want tomatoes as fast as I can get them. So I’ve been buying one of those bush tomato plants that are already a foot or two high to get a head start.   I think I ended up with a Bush Goliath. It already has a few blooms. There was one with two fairly large green tomatoes on it, but that is just too much cheating for me. Then I usually by an Early Girl (also not heirloom or organic) because they go from seedling to fruit in about 50 days.. I thought I bought one of those but I accidentally got a Beefsteak instead. I’m sort of irritated by that, but whatever.  So my tomato plant count is currently at 2!

I also planted two pepper plants, one yellow bell, and one (heirloom) tabasco I will plant when my planter dries out some, it was sort of water logged. I had a curly and a flat parsley (organic from Whole Foods) and a basil (from Home Depot) that I planted in one pot. The only herb that I grow consistently well is oregano, my parsley and  basil will probably be dead in a week.  There was flat after flat of emptiness where the cilantro was supposed to be. We have a very large Mexican population here and we always run out of cilantro quickly.  The fact that I can practically walk to about half a dozen really good authentic Mexican places makes me not get irritated by that. But I am trying to learn some Mexican dishes to cook myself (mostly I want to make my own tomatillo sauce, and of course I am obsessed with the spicy pickled onions) so I’d like to grow some cilantro this summer.

Then I bought six containers of red and yellow Gerber daisies and I already want more. I am also wishing I would have bought more planters at Publix when they had the pretty clay southwestern  ones for ten …or was it twenty bucks each. Speaking of planters, if you are rich, Home Depot has absolutely gorgeous hand painted large planters for $80 each. Each one is completely different and I coveted them all.

And so it begins. If you are new to TT you should be aware that I obsess about gardening for approximately three weeks and then once everything is in the ground I never want to water or weed.  The planting is the fun part.

Wednesday I need to put out weed killer and grass seed before rain returns on Thursday. In fact it may rain too hard on Thursday so I’ll wait until Friday. My shrubs are over grown, my front yard as ZERO grass and all weeds, the front porch paint is peeling and there is now wet potting soil all over it.

So in order to paint the actual picture, you have to imagine a horribly overgrown yard a driveway with grass growing through the cracks (because of course grass grows THERE) and then a couple pretty pots of daisies an a couple of tomato plants. :)  And I’m just  fine with that. I’m not trying to win a neighborhood yard award in the ghetto. I just want a good tomato for a BLT in June.

Has anyone else started yet? As you know you are all required to participate in Tamara Tomato Therapy Program every summer. I have spies everywhere.


Filed under Entertainment News

84 responses to “The First Tomato Planting of 2016!

  1. Victoria W. Jefferson

    GORGEOUS heirloom tomatoes….

  2. Lorri K

    I looked at the plants yesterday at Lowes. Gonna try my hand at it, last year I grew 3 tomatoes and 4 peppers :(

  3. Billie_bee

    Am buying my tomato plants tomorrow! My Basil and mint are doing awesome, we ate so much basil this weekend. My oregano, which I planted from seeds, is finally starting to show green sprouts.

  4. Spilledperfume

    I can’t plant anything where I live but I’m moving in a few weeks so maybe I’ll plant something then.

    My dad grows the best tomatoes. The neighbors were always hinting that they would love some homegrown tomatoes from my dad.

    I love Gerber daisies.

  5. loriflack

    Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s tomatoes ? ~

  6. NeverBeenJaxed

    Exciting!!! I’m waiting patiently till Memorial Day weekend up here in DYT but we have had really oddly warm weather this year. The winter was essentially non-existent and I’m ok with that.

    I actually work at Home Depot, TT, and I’ve been watching all the vegies, flowers, and seeds come in by the pallet for about a month or so now and I can’t wait to get started! I have big plans this year for the garden. There’s also a Bonnie greenhouse right up the road from me which I didn’t know till recently.

    I’m also going to get myself some Duke’s mayo because the experts here will not allow any other kind of mayo for ‘mater sandwiches. Amazon here I come!

    Happy Planting !!!

  7. PopcornAndVodka

    I moved to a house with a yard so I get to participate this year!! I planted five tomatoes, two tomatillos, 2 zucchini, one mint that was completely eaten up over night, and some basil and lavender. Oh, and peas which have not grown one centimeter in a month.

    • daintyfeets

      Careful with the mint. Here in Mo, once it’s planted, it never goes away and spreads like wildfire.

      • PopcornAndVodka

        Same here, I planted it in the flower garden (mostly empty) by a bird bath, I thought it would look pretty all overgrown. Unfortunately this mint isn’t going anywhere. Overnight it got eaten to just the stems. :(

      • tamaratattles

        It will come back. I kept praying for mine to become “overgrown” my first year. It is literally everywhere now. The entire garden is covered. But it’s easy to dig out a hole and the roots aren’t that deep. It smells great and keeps vermin away. Well except for whatever is eating yours. Which is probably caterpillars.

  8. SubLife

    I have been waiting for this post forever! I am a long time lurker but never post a thing. I was inspired last summer by tomato therapy and can’t wait to participate this year! I have already gotten a bit of a jump start and planted oregano, basil, parsley, thyme, cilantro, rosemary, and japaleño & chili peppers. Now that you’ve made it official I’m excited to head out to get our tomato plants! If I don’t get called in tomorrow, I’ll be heading to Home Depot.

    • tamaratattles

      YAY! Thanks for posting a comment! It saves the TT Police a surveillance trip. I’m jealous of all your herbs. I planted spearmint in my tiny garden spot and it is COVERED. I think mint is actually a good crop for tomatoes both as a companion and as a ground cover over the winter. I’m just digging out holes in it for my plants. I need more pots!

      • SubLife

        So far the herbs are doing really well. Though it has only been a week. I thought about planting mint as well but I don’t think I’d use it enough. I have a friend who makes minty dog treats for her dog. What are your plans for the spearmint?

      • tamaratattles

        My mint is mostly for ground cover initially bought to run off rats. Gross I know but the hood is full of them. They don’t like mint, it smells great looks fine and is supposedly a good companion for tomatoes. Sometimes I muddle some leaves in ice water iced tea.

  9. SaraK

    I would like a tomato waiver in lieu of a green pepper. Got one on Sunday and waiting to see it actually produce something. This will be my first attempt at growing my food. Don’t judge, I made hard boiled eggs for the first time this evening. Baby steps to eating better.

  10. Dee

    OMG!!! It’s time to plant the tomatoes! This year I am starting out right! Tomorrow I go looking for any kind of tomato plant I can get though heirloom is preferred. This will be fun Tamara, thank you!

  11. Minky

    I’m tempted to try my hand at some tomato-ing. I bought some tomatoes from the supermarket the other day and made a tomato, green bell pepper and red onion salad that I dressed with some olive oil, red wine vinegar, salt and pepper. It was horrible. The tomatoes had no taste whatsoever. If it hadn’t have been for the onion my salad would have been inedible. Homegrown is best. They have to smell good as well as taste good.

  12. Yesterday I finished clearing and turning the soil in my beds. Planted asparagus, dill and basil.

  13. TheArtistFormerlyKnownAsYoya

    Somehow our parsley survived the Canadian winter and is doing quite well! Though I live in the warmest place in the entire country, Home Depot just didn’t have anything exciting going yet. But my Hostas from last year are poking up, as is my Japanese Painted Fern and my Bleeding Hearts. Excite!

  14. Lime Brain

    We got the tomato seedlings started last week. The rule of thumb around here is don’t put anything outside until mother’s day. There is always one last cold snap before than just so mother nature can fuck with anyone who tries to do it earlier.

    I’ve given up trying to grow cilantro. It’s just not worth the effort. But this year, I’m going to t Ryan Vietnamese coriander. It says it tastes just like it and it grows like a weed. I’m sure I will be disappointed.

    I’m growing a lot of flowers by seed this year because I broke down and bought 2 overpriced lantana trees from qvc and there went the majority of my gardening budget. I googled everywhere and nobody else is selling them. I better not regret these trees.

    I had some sweet pea seeds soaking in a paper cup and forgot about them. I found the cup and went eww! and dumped it down the sink before realizing what it was. I was able to save a few. Hope they will grow. The nurseries want 8 dollars a plant in a tiny little pot.

    I can’t wait for it to warm up enough to put all the plants I’ve overwintered outside because I want the room back and I’m tired of looking at their sad faces.

    • tamaratattles

      I love that you find things in the kitchen that you don’t know what they are… Me too! But it’s never anything cool like sweet pea seeds.

    • Spilledperfume

      I’m sure the trees will be nice. QVC is known for their quality.

      • Lime Brain

        Thanks! I’m considering planting them in bigger containers so I can dig them up and overwritten them in the house. But then again, by the end of summer I’m sure I’ll say screw it. I don’t care anymore.

  15. My tomato seedlings are coming along just fine. I planted seeds less than a week ago and I’m obsessed. I pull up to the window with my laptop and watch them grow?

  16. Lime Brain

    Oh, and just in case anyone cares, I’ve been watching the hummingbird migration map, and they have just made it past North Carolina and are now in Virginia. I use these birds as an excuse to leave the dandelions and some of the other flowering weeds alone so the hummers will have something to drink when they get here.

  17. Rose

    Which is the best tomato plant to get if you’ve never grown tomatoes before? I need a how to grow tomatoes class 101!

    • tamaratattles

      Rose, for a first timer, go with an Early Girl. That is usually about two months to wait for a tomato. That’s a long time for a new gardener to wait. :) Maybe pick one other kind for a back up. Sun Gold or Sun Burst yellow grape tomatoes are fairly fast growers, plentiful and very tasty. We’ll help you out along the way. Good luck!

  18. I’ve also been looking at tomato plants and a few other plants. I’ve a huge gopher problem so will need to do a raised bed or in large buckets.
    Thinking about growing s few weed plants. I don’t have a growers license in order to sell but I could do a few trades.
    Just thinking about it.

  19. kellie

    We went ahead and started planting outside on Saturday. We started our tomato seeds in the house along with Bell peppers and jalapeño peppers. I think me and the hubby both just got sick of constantly taking the plants outside during the day to take advantage of the sun but then bringing them in at night. It turned into a big pain in the ass.
    We have our squash, cucumber and okra seeds starting inside now. I also got cantaloupe and watermelon seeds but for some reason we always suck at growing those. Maybe this year will be the year for the melons though.
    I always end up having a love/hate relationship with the garden, I generally am over it when it’s time to start canning although it’s great having the stockpile throughout the year.
    We aren’t doing our usual purple hull peas this year, we are replacing them with some green pole beans. Hopefully it’s a productive year for everyone!!!
    Happy Gardening!

  20. BeetsWhy

    “And so it begins. If you are new to TT you should be aware that I obsess about gardening for approximately three weeks and then once everything is in the ground I never want to water or weed. The planting is the fun part.”

    TT we are gardening soul sisters! Love the planting, hate the maintenance.

    Just planted four tomato plants instead of the 15 last year. Also planted some herbs. Sadly I must report my beets last year were a complete failure…probably due to my hatred of maintenance, but lettuces/greens did great. this year I will remember to stagger the seedlings and planting so I don’t have to eat ten heads at once ?

    either way, here we go again!

    • tamaratattles

      I stood looking at the lettuces today. Again. To me it seems ready to eat when I see them in the store. I think I had this conversation last year but, Lymenopause. sigh.

      I have lots of cognitive dissonance about growing lettuce.

  21. Heidi Lowe

    I’m trying to raise $$ for our family vacation in June, so I’ve planted about 20 packs of different tomato seeds. Right now I have about 200 one inch tomato seedlings – they’re just getting their second and third set of leaves, so exciting! Also about 200 that I just planted last week and haven’t sprouted yet. Our rummage sale is the end of April so I have to keep them alive for four more weeks! The stress! Lol! (Long time reader, first time poster. I love TT!)

    • tamaratattles

      Love the plan to sell seedlings, Heidi!

      • Heidi Lowe

        I’m geeking out that you replied to me, thank you! We just got a rescue dog and he sounds much like your Banjo – his name is Rocket. As for the tomatos, they are my favorite thing to grow. Lots of people have little plant sales where I live (WI) so I thought I’d try my hand at it :)

      • tamaratattles

        What kinds of tomatoes do you Yankee types grow? :)

        Cherokee purples were a big thing down here for a bit and I succumbed to some peer pressure (aka my sister wanted to grow them) but I think I’ll pass on the weird stuff this year and just have a couple yellow Sun Gold type grape tomatoes and the rest different varietals of the red slicing sammich kind. :)

      • Heidi Lowe

        We grow pretty much the same as the southerners, only difference is that we have to start them in Feb/March from seeds or buy established plants from a greenhouse so that we can actually get a harvest in late summer. I like the idea of heirloom tomatoes or odd striped/colored ones, but reality is, the hybrid old stand by varietys like Better Boy, Beefsteak, Early Girl/Boy etc…are the ones that do best for me. I’m trying Black Krim this year though, sounds like your Cherokee Purple 😉 I’m a container gardener, tomatoes and bush zucchini are my favorite thing to grow. My cucumbers always suck :(

      • Brandy wine heirloom tomatoes are always a favorite here in the DNC (damn near Canada). They are strange looking things but the flavor is the best I’ve even grown. I won’t be planting until Memorial Day weekend but I can’t wait!

  22. Espi

    Thanks for inspiring me TT. I’ve been going hard this season. I had my spring break two weeks ago (love education jobs) and went hard on the gardening.
    Two tomatoes, zucchini, cucumber, oregano, cilantro, jalapeño, and chile ancho.

    Tomato sauce is extra easy.
    Green tomatillo sauce is two tomatillos for every one jalapeño and toast until they turn brown. Half an onion and salt to your like. Blend. Don’t add water.
    Tomato red sauce same and you could also add dried chile California (toasted as well) and even a garlic.
    Easy peasy. Cilantro is usually just garnish.

  23. More Tea Please!

    North Georgia Garden Report – dwarf tomato seedlings are 2 weeks old. Spinach, lettuce, kale, arugula, radish and cilantro growing in raised beds.

    And my pride and joy…I fell in love with Mirabelle Plums when I went to France last fall. Thenjam is to die for. So I tracked down the only supplier in the US and ordered 2 trees. They came in last week and week tucked them into their new homes and put deer fencing around the babies. It will be years bedore we have druit and then we’ll probably need an electric fence to keep Smoky from destroying the trees and stewling the crop.

    We spotted our first bear today, cruising up the road from our house.

    • Lime Brain

      Bears?!? Oh, my! And I thought deer were bad. I’m glad I don’t have to contend with bears in my garden or anywhere else.

  24. I have next weekend off. Will go tomato plant hunting. Just ate two more of Lil Kyle’s babies. Now she is growing another one. (evil cackle)

  25. Allison

    My mother in law is in charge of the tomato plants-but for the past 2 years, it has been my mission to have a pumpkin patch and let me tell ya-what should be basic and relatively simple is anything but. The first year I got TONS of blooms, no fruit. None. Then last year, same problem with the tons of blooms/no fruit, but to add insult to injury, the plants got this white powdery fungus or something all over them and died, pretty quickly. Not sure what that was and how to prevent it-and why I’m only getting a million blooms and no fruit. Are pumpkins really that fickle and difficult? I know there are male flowers/female flowers and I’m clearly getting one and not the other. Hopefully one of you wonderful TT readers will recognize my plight. I’m gonna try ONE more time, if the 3rd time is not the charm, I am going to accept a pumpkin patch is never in my future. As for planting-I’m nervous to do anything outdoors right after Easter as I’m in the Northeast-I wait until mid May for outside stuff.

    • Lime Brain

      Two years ago, we had a pumpkin growing contest around town with a few friends. I had the same problem of all flowers and no pumpkins. Then the deer got the plants. When I went to a pumpkin farm to buy some pumpkins in October, I asked the owner about it. He said pumpkins need a lot more sun than you think to set fruit.

      My aunt planted her two plants at the edge of her deck and ended up with tons of pumpkins. The plants were taking over her yard, even climbing up the pine trees. I think that spot worked well for her because the roots grew under the deck, keeping them cool and they got a lot of water from all the run off water from watering her potted plants. She won the contest.

      Last year, I changed where I planted mine. We dug up the side yard that used to be all grass (really weeds). It was basically all sand. We had put down black plastic to kill the grass and cut holes in it for the plants and covered it with grass cuttings. They had sun coming from all 4 directions. These plants took over the whole side yard and back yard. Got tons of pumpkins also. They like acid soil which I have.

      Sounds like your pumpkins got powdery mildew. It’s pure luck not to get it. Just try not to get the leaves wet when you water them and don’t bother spraying them with sour milk. Tried it with cucumbers and I didn’t see a difference.

      • Allison

        @Lime Brain Thank you, thank you and thank you. I am going to try your recommendation of more sun-the last 2 patches definitely werent in the best sun spots in the yard, so I’ll plant the seeds this week and see how it goes. The 2nd patch started taking over as well, but my husband put a bunch of stakes around the patch and the plants seemed to like that.

      • Lime Brain

        Allison, you should really find and watch the documentary “Lords of t he Gourd”. It about a bunch of different people raising pumpkins for a pumpkin contest in Cooperstown, NY. It is hilarious and amazing what these people go through. They are all nuts. Then they finally have to get these 500 pound pumpkins to the contest intact.

        I think it will inspire you.

  26. Sammie

    I’m so excited to see its Tomato Time ☺
    I saw some beautiful tomato plants at Publix last week. I was tempted to get one because I loved reading about the tomatoes last year, but it was too expensive and it felt like cheating since the plant was already 3 ft high.

  27. Rita

    I moved into a house with a yard and bought some seeds. Let’s see what happens. I have tomatoes, basil, cilantro, oregano, zucchini, habeneros and I forget what else. I’m looking forward to planting and see what grows. I’ve been stalking the Home Depot gardening section for ideas.

  28. m

    tomatoes weren’t at the garden store yet when I went a couple weeks ago as here in VA, we had a couple cold snaps recently. Hopefully this weekend I can go… my favorite, which I discovered thanks to a neighbor, are “sun gold” tomatoes which are the size of cherry tomatoes but REALLY sweet and full flavored, truly tastes like eating berries.

  29. Iprefermyteaunsweetend

    Just planted my tomatoes this morning! So far we have arugula, collards, romaine, broccoli, onions, basil, cilantro, Rosemary, cabbage,thyme and banana peppers! It’s addictive. Love my cuciferous veggies – they are natural cancer fighters! Planting asparagus soon! As they say, gardening is much cheaper than therapy and you get tomatoes!!!??

    • Iprefermyteaunsweetend

      Oh and strawberries!!! I’m so proud of them! Love that I’m not the only gardening geek to post here! I also plant any flower that will encourage butterflies and hummingbirds to come visit!

  30. tamaratattles

    So I am on a weird sleep cycle where I don’t want to go to sleep until around 3. WHICH IS REALLY 2 am. Last night I woke up around 5 and the TV was on CNN and I got all engrossed in the Egyptian plane hijacking story. So I didn’t really wake up until about 12:30. I got up around one to peek out and admire my planting. Ask I mentioned, I planted two large dish type planters of Gerber Daisies. One looks fabulous, but the other pot the flowers were already very droopy. The plantes have huge leaves and I probably just didn’t get up under them enough to check that they were properly watered. So I have been hovering over them for the past hour hoping they will perk back up.

    Also, the parsley is already crapping out. There are a LOT of superstitions about parsley. One is you can only grow it if you are evil. Another is you should never plant it because it will rob your soul. Ooops too late. Plant parsley if you want a baby. If parsley grows at your house it means the woman is the boss of the household. It’s also been used to cause an abortion. And if you are ever PMSing and can’t get um, started? If you make a parsley tea, it will bring on your cycle. (I’ve done that before and it works.

    Anyway, I’m rambling. I just wanted to let you know I am already killing things. ON DAY 2. This is not good for the therapeutic aspects! LOL. Hopefully the water will perk everyone up they will learn to live another day.

    • Lime Brain

      I was reading to my mother the superstitions of parsley. She had one to add. It has to visit the devil six times before it sprouts.

      She also said that if eating parsley could cause an abortion, women would be eating it like mad!

      • tamaratattles

        No one said anything about eating the parsley. That’s all I’ll say on the subject, so as not to cause anyone to do anything based on my comments.

      • Katherine 2.0

        Yikes. Never heard that about parsley. Planted it last summer and it lasted until January. In a planter, outside. Yea, I am the boss of the house. So there’s that.

    • JustJenn

      I googled parsley and learned about all of the superstitions…and it’s safe to say I’ll never plant it, thanks to you :)

      Also tomato time is when my ex bf comes back and usually makes me cry for a year. He’s being nice and normal this year…whatever that means. I have a much better guy to date now, but I still covet the ex because, dumb.

    • Iprefermyteaunsweetend

      Gerber daisies can be temperamental. They grow beautifully in my neighbors yard, but no so much in mine. I have a lot of trees and so only a certain spot gets the sunlight they require. I do container gardening so I can move the pots into the appropriate sunny spots when required. This year after many tries and fails, it seems I’ve found the perfect sunny spot for roses! I’m too excited. I’ve actually planted cilantro and parsley which now seems kinda redundant. So funny about the parsley though because I definitely rule my house! Love that im not the only person who wakes in the wee hours to admire how my garden grows! Love you, TT!

  31. Cat

    Oops! No tomatoes for me this year!

    Instead, I have been busy adopting 2 senior cats who were about to be sent to death row. Finally, after almost a month, we worked out transport (they are in Florida). They should get here around the 3rd or 4th. 2 lives saved!

    Once they get here, my rent will go up by $30 a month (pet rent). So I may or may not be able to grow much this year. If I plant anything, it will be wildflowers. Maybe I can save the bees….and thus save the world!

  32. tamaratattles

    I had the yard crew out today to cut the grass, the shrubs, dewed the fucking DRIVEWAY (don’t ask. ghetto) and clean out the gutters. I was going to have them put out weed killer but they cut most everything to THE DIRT (again, ghetto) So I had them put down the seed I bought instead.

    Then I realized this was my best shot to try and do it right and went and bought MORE grass seed and some wheat grass. The birds were eating it as I was spraying it over the yard.

    I also bought some more daises. A cucumber plant, a bunch of odd looking tulips dark red tulips and two even darker red snap dragons. I normally do an all white garden but after I bought the first load of red and yellow Gerber daisies, I got some sort of in for a penny, in for another fucking 80 bucks.

    I need an intervention.

    And more spoons. I’m going to try and clear out the flower garden and plant the new flowers tomorrow. #Exhausted #HowAreThereSoManyOldLadyGardeners

    • Lime Brain

      “In for another 80 bucks”

      Just be thankful you don’t watch qvc when they’re hocking their plants. I wish my 2 plants cost only 80 bucks.

      Now that I typed this, What was I thinking?!?

      I even waited a few weeks before ordering them. I must have really wanted them….

      Sorry, I can’t help you with the grass. I have zero interest in grass.

  33. tamaratattles

    I also had to buy a sprinkler because I was not sure my old one worked. How long should I let it run on the new seed? Anybody?

  34. Toni Lee Gildea

    I am green with gardening envy. This Damn Yankee saw the lawn three days ago for the first time, now it is covered in snow.
    Very glad to hear you are getting out in the world. I will be joining the tomato challenge in late April, or May. Michigan.

  35. tamaratattles

    Sunday planting. Got the tulips out. But the Snap dragons were not snapdragons at all, but some form of dianthus. That would not bother me much as they were cheap, but they are labeled as annuals which I should have know from the price. Since I am in zone 7b+/8a- as I like to call it, I can sometimes overwinter an annual depending on how much it freezes. And since the earth is burning up due to cow farts and Aquanet usaged in the 70s, I’m not sure the perennial/annual distinction matters so much.

    I also moved around some money plant. I got that from mother I think, some years ago. Or perhaps I bought it, but if you want a cool plant that multiplies like crazy get yourself some money plant.


    • tamaratattles

      Sorry, my laptop was being wonky and I posted before losing the text. That site leaves off THE BEST PART of the money plant and why it is called the money plant. In the fall, those green seed pods drop out the seeds and then the stick with the seed pod dies.

      THEN you take your thumb on one side and your fingers on the other and help the seeds fall out (be sure you want more plants wherever you do this. And you end up with round shimmery “coins” that you will find in super fancy pants arrangements.

      Sites like this sell it to rich people even though Money plant is very invasive and some consider it a weed. Florist do the same with Queen Annes Lace which is also a weed, but a lot harder to find in a ditch these days. #SecondGenerationGhettoGardener

      Here is a site selling the money part to rich people. You can see why they buy it, it’s very pretty

      • Dee

        The money plant is gorgeous! I hope my Walmart gets some plants soon or I will end up with a petmato

    • tamaratattles

      There are probably other names for money plant, (that may be a southern term) the scientific name is Lunaria annua probably because the “coins” also look like moons.

      Anyway, next I planted my tabasco pepper. At least I thought I did. I got it all done and looked for my little name sign, because lord knows I can’t remember what I planted yesterday. Then I noticed I had planted a cucumber plant. OOOPS. I went to the kitchen and got the pepper and popped it in the pot. This is my first tabasco pepper. It seems that THE CHANGE also changes your tastebuds and I have developed a thing for pickled foods and spicy foods I never had before. I’ll keep you posted

      I put the cucumber plant in a slightly bigger pot than it came in. I have this whackadoodle plan for using one of those folding tomato cages (NEVER BUY THOSE! THEY ARE A PITA! JUST BUY THE ROUND KIND) as a tressle leaning against the back side of the house to see if it will grow that way. They are supposed to be grown on mounds but I don’t have a place to do that. It’s a four dollar experiment. I like experiments.

      I also did some weeding. (YUCK) and cleaned five years of grime off my white mailbox. Why did it take five years? Because, Lymenopause. I am inching toward remission and starting to get back to my old self. Whether that is a good or a bad thing remains to be seen.

      Now please report on your progress. DO NOT MAKE ME SEND THE Tomato Therapy enforcement police to your door! Oh and I watered my two mater plants too.

      Now someone PUHLEASE stop me from going to WalMart for snapdragons and heirloom tomato plants.

      • Toni Lee Gildea

        A little snapdragon never hurt anyone. They just seem like such a happy little flower. I have officially lost my mind now.

  36. rebecca

    I’ve got my one tomato planted (a Marglobe, which I believe is a heirloom variety) and it’s doing well, as it’s already added nearly 12″ to its height. I live in Houston, which allows planting much earlier than most parts of the country. My basil is also going crazy, so I hope to enjoy a caprese salad before too long.

    I’ve used up almost all of my empty planting space, so I think I can (fortunately) give my wallet a rest from the garden center for awhile.

  37. tamaratattles

    First, play this video (but skip watching it) as you read this.

    ​I am here to tell you that going to Wal*Mart is NOT at ALL the same as going to Home Depot. And I’m not just talking about how Home Depot is full of hot, sexy, aged appropriate men with good jobs (who are all unfortunately for me gay), and Wal*Mart is full of The People of Wal*Mart particularly on a Sunday.

    I swore to myself today that I would absolutely not go to Home Depot today. Because I have no business spending MORE money on gardening. At least not for another week or so. But I didn’t say anything about not going to Wal*Mart, where there just happens to be a Garden Center.

    But there are TWO Wal*Marts near me. On the same street. Within two miles of each other, and I went to the old one, because I pass it first. It was a complete and utter disappointment with minimal exceptions. First, I got four STUNNING red and yellow dahlias to plant in front of my oddball red and yellow tulips that look more like poppys. I a bought a bedraggled Early Girl tomato to plant because is had a very sturdy stem. and a few blooms already. ( That’s TWO cheat plants for those counting) They did not have the popular yellow Sun Whatever grape tomatoes that I went for. The did have a big pot like the Bush Goliaths come in with what professed to be a Cherokee Purple, but I really didn’t believe it was a Cherokee Purple because they don’t come like that, usually. So my entire purchase at the Wal*Mart Garden was approximately $22! YAY! I got off easy!

    Except I went INSIDE Wal *Mart and blew another $123 on two pairs of clean old man pajamas, (because I live in them and I don’t haul my clothes to the Fluff and Fold often enough), the toilet paper I actually went in for, a bag of avocados (because, why not?), A two gallon glass drink dispenser (Iced Tea season has arrived), a clean toilet seat (Because $5 is well spent to avoid cleaning the current one), a bunch of light bulbs (Thanks Government for making them cost a billion dollars now and making a basic 60 watt bulb a challenge to find) and some clean silverware (because bitch be hungry and I am not wanting to wash the sink overrun with dishes).

    This why I was not supposed to go inside.

    This was my other jam. You will probably like it better.

    Nonetheless, my wayward behavior made me feel kind of giddy as I drove home listening to Chamillionaire’s “Ridin’ Dirty” which is probably not about a menopausal woman coming home from Wal*Mart covered in garden dirt mocking the popo, but it felt like it to me. Then I had to leave the car running because some version of Soul II Soul’s Back to Life was playing and the lyrics (Back to Life, Back to Reality, Back to the Here and Now…) seemed an appropriate anthem to my beginning to recover from Lymenopause. I’m not sure singing “However do you want me? However do you need me?” while planting the dahlias and the early girl was particularly pleasing to those walking past. But as a blossoming crone, I am fresh out of fucks to give.

    And now, I am going to try to be a bit less dirty now that I’m done driving and get ready to recap the last episode of the RHOA reunion, which I am so pleased to be done with.


    • Dee

      Love this! “I’m fresh out of fucks to give” I’m using the first chance I get. Excuse me while I go pick a fight ;). Thank you!!

  38. Lime Brain

    Taking a break from RHOBH to report that nothing is going on with my gardening. The weather has been horrendous with temps going down to the low 20s at night, winds in the daytime with gusts of 30-40 mph, and freezing rain mixed with snow at times.

    All I can do is watch out the window and watch the weeds grow and I can’t spray or do anything to work on the garden beds to get them ready for planting. We had nicer weather in February. This proves that April is the cruelest month.

  39. tamaratattles

    We’re have a distinct LACK of global warming this week too. we will have lows in the 30s this weekend. I am about to dash out to dollar tree. I went in one yesterday to buy some of those hand held pencil sharpeners because ALL of my makeup pencil are always worn down and I’m going to get a splinter in my eyeball!

    They had these little boxes of wild flower seed I want to sow tonight and I just bought a couple. I think I will go back and SPLURGE on five dollars worth. And hey if a bag or two of REISINS find their way into by basket… whadyagonnado?

  40. Lime Brain

    Tomato Update!

    Between yesterday and today, I have all my tomatoes transplanted from their starter cell packs to paper cups. Half the pepper seedlings are done also. Every window sill in the house is covered with the plants.

    The wind has finally calmed down enough to put out the humming bird feeder and a friend unexpectedly stopped by and put up 4 bird houses for me.

    I got 8 new lavender plants in the ground to replace the ones that didn’t make it over the winter and mulched. I was annoyed that my lime brain had kicked in and mistakenly bought black instead of brown. What a pain to try to hide all the brown popping out.

    I’m sure I did other things outside, but won’t bore anyone further, but I do want to say that while working outside I was silently cursing my doctor because he doesn’t consider gardening exercise.

    Oh, and I finally saw bees out and about and that made me happy because I was getting worried about them because they are usually out long before this.

    • Dee

      LimeBrain, you got a lot done! I’m jealous. I was about to plant, we had freezing weather. This weekend I’ll try again. Fingers crossed :)

    • tamaratattles

      Your update made ME exhausted, Lime Brain. Tell your doctor he is an idiot and have him come over and help you plant next time.

      It’s getting ready to rain here. I put out grass seed on my front lawn area and I don’t think there is a single seed left. I realy wanted to move some big clumps of grass from the back yard to the front before it rains, but I’m feeling all weird and out of breath. It’s either the change in barometric pressure or a panic attack. Either way I am ready for it to pass.

      I really am enjoying the dahlias though.

      Oh and my fucktard, Norman Bates, Gaybor is adding more shit to his front yard now that mine looks nice. Sigh. First I thought he just bought the ugliest purple mailbox in history, but it is worse than that. Apparently he PAINTED the old mailbox purple. And he has paint left. So he painted some sort of frog statue purple. And now he is building some sort of fence and washing the screens for his windows.

      I should point out that his house is floor to ceiling with crap he has bought. Things like flooring materials and home improvement crap, It’s all been sitting there since the 1990s There is one creepy front room that has not changed since the house was built in 1950. Seriously, it looks the same way it looked when I was in kindergarten. The rest of the house is STUFFED TO THE GILLS. There are like six sheds of shit in the backyard.

      The front yard has shit tons of furniture, a giant clock and a variety of “projects” in the driveway. The current projects all involve painting shit purple.

      Okay I will shut up now but he is such a piece of shit. I am TRYING to move.

  41. Lime Brain

    Thanks, guys. This has been the first 2 days where it hasn’t been raining or snowing in quite a while. It’s supposed to rain again tomorrow. So, even though it was still cold, I tried to get a lot of the little nagging things done with the time I had.

    Tamara, the purple painting of things made me laugh. Sorry. It wouldn’t happen to be Radient Orchid, would it? Pantene color of the year for 2014. Project Runway foisted it on us back then. Tell him he should be painting everything Rose Quartz and Serenity if he wants to keep up with the times.

    Though, seriously, I feel for you with all the shit all over his yard. I wish you could post pictures of the purple frog.

  42. tamaratattles

    NOE! it is a god awful dark purple. His mother who became a supreme cunt (I’ll spare you, just trust me) died and he’s gay so now his freak flag is flying replete with purple frogs apparently. The guy has literally barely left that house since he was born. Though he did live in this one once. It was a rental property for many years. He loves to tell all of my yard workers he is dying of shit and I don’t care, but he seems to be making quite the comeback now that Mommy is dead. I can count on two hands the gay men I don’t like and he gets at least both middle fingers. He’s a drug addict, a thief and a liar.

    I really thought when his mother died he would hang himself or become a hermit. But no. He’s apparently going to paint everything in his yard purple. His across the street neighbors painted the back addition of their house some weird blue color and he had a meltdown about it. But now he has a fuck dark purple MAILBOX.

    Any time someone comes over he rushes out to engage them in conversation. I was out of the country last December and I am sure he accosted the dog sitter who seem disinterested in ever doing it again.


  43. tamaratattles

    I’m so glad we have this secret place where I can pray for his death… but he is suddenly vibrant and manages to walk his decrepit POS purse dog now. It seems he is suddenly not dying of anything as he tells my visitors. DAMN IT.

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