UPDATED: Yolanda has taken her blog down. Did Bravo force her to do it? Or did she just have too much negative feedback?
Yolanda Foster, who now goes by Hadid because of her newly famous children, has written a blog this week in excess of 220o words. I was going to only purple pen the most appalling parts, but frankly, I think you need to see it in all of its glory. It’s not on Bravo this week. She created her own blog just for this post. Why would she do that? Because Bravo removes a lot of production related stuff from the official blogs and sometimes cuts things down for length reasons. They do not edit for grammar, typos etc as a general rule. Let’s do this. I have several purple pens ready to go. Warning, this is a very long and highly upsetting post. She’s truly vile.
Hello bravo lovers,
My apology for not writing a blog last week, I was in NY with my children and had the privilege to sit front row, to watch Gigi and 20 other beautiful models walk the runway for TOMMY HILFIGER. It was amazing and good for the soul
Thanks for letting us know you were on the front row. We might have missed the importance of your being there otherwise.
Overall the week was a good test run out in the real world but unfortunately I still don’t have the stamina I had hoped for, I carefully counted my spoons but had to miss a lot of exciting events with my girls to keep my business obligations. I did make it to the club house though, saw Andy and was saved by the bell in the great company of the funny and talented Graig Ferguson.
Please don’t mistake my cross country trip as me feeling better. I am still very ill. So ill it would be…what is the legal term? Oh yes, ‘unconscionable’ so under California Family Code 1612 for me not to receive lots of spousal support despite my prenuptial agreement. Please note, I have brain damage. Don’t believe me? Check the link. I’ve done my homework. Here, on my death bed where I haven’t read anything pretty much since my marriage began, because “neurological Lyme.”
Watching tonight’s episode was uneasy to say the least. Not sure a word factory could produce the right ones to describe it because there are so many perceptions and sides to this story. I do see that when you are absent, not able to participate in life with your circle of friends, it leaves a lot of space for speculations…. The small moments you see go back SIX MONTHS in time…….. and remember they are merely minutes of much larger conversations. What I felt then is not what I feel today. I excepted Lisa’s R apology when she visited me at my home and was grateful that she showed up and owned her mistake. Yet, her words are out in the universe and I must admit that once I read the definition of “Manshausen” it hurt and definitely infuriated me. It was hard to understand why anyone would make such a distorted and untrue statement related to my health journey in front of my friends and millions of viewers out in the world.
You would think that sometime since then you would learn how to spell Munchausen, yet you keep pretending not to know the word, and conveniently read the “by proxy” version on camera so that people would not notice you fit all the symptoms. Spell check automatically corrects the word, so you would have to force it to correct by typing it incorrectly three time to get your misspelling to stand. Perhaps you don’t want people Googling the symptoms (Doctor shopping, non-traditional treatments, obsession with medical records)?
When Eilleen came to my home, I confided in her about how I felt, I had no problem with her downloading it to Rinna as I trust that Eilleen always speaks with good intent. I solely used the word bipolar for argument’s sake but I realize now that it seems like an eye for an eye, which was not my intent and I apologize if it came across that way.
For a split second, someone might even believe this comment. Not me, but someone. Then in her next sentence …
I never went out into the world and judged Rinna’s behavior in Amsterdam when it actually happened a year and a half ago, I never spoke in public about her outrageous texts to my friend Kim Richards because that wasn’t my battle to fight. Fast forwarding to my conversation with Eilleen, Rinna’s judgment now was my problem as I had become #3 in this group to be labeled by her publicly.
You are on a reality show exhibiting wildly different symptoms. Running a scavenger hunt through Beverly Hills, riding bikes through Amsterdam, taking self-defense classes, and then boldly saying to the people you did these things with that you haven’t walker, or gotten out of bed for years. How can they ignore that level of crazy? I dunno who else you mean other than Kim Richards, but she was in full blown alcoholic mode and Rinna was trapped in a car with her for 45 minutes. Again, how was she to ignore that? She was correct with her label of Kim and that gives her great credibility when it comes to trying to diagnose your batshittery.
The life of any chronically ill person becomes extremely isolating. At that time I was ultra sensitive to other people’s energy. Therefore when I arrived at Erica’s barbecue the week before I could feel Rinna’s energy which was obviously fueled by eilleen’s download of our conversation. Which I did not understand then, but i do understand now…… Regardless we laid it all out on the table once more, discussed it and I chose to move on because I really did not have the energy or focus to stay stuck in the negativity.
Seriously? We’re going back to Rinna at the BBQ? Aren’t you supposed to be whining about Kyle now?
Our hug felt right and authentic to me at that time……. Strangely enough even that was doubted and judged by some.
We or better said, They have now spoken about my struggles for the past 13 episodes and even though Rinna and I moved on……… Kyle and LVP felt the need to stir the pot one more time…… Which felt extremely insensitive to me.
In my culture whispering in the company of others is considered rude……
In my culture, people on reality TV shows who discuss authenticity, pot stirring and insensitivity are usually trying to play the victim. You are on a reality show. We all understand all to well the ins and out of production driven conversations. You constantly assume we are naïve. We are not.
Getting dressed, buying flowers for LVP’s birthday and showing up to lunch was a great personal accomplishment for me but I have learned now that I can’t assume people will understand how that feels unless they have been in my shoes and walked this journey. Once I learned to accept the meaning of those words, life got easier, my expectations disappeared.
I don’t think you have learned that yet. Because you say you had expectations of LVP that were not met and then say you’ve learned not to have expectations. Generally, once you are in perimenopause, you get that realization. Kind people even begin to think of others that mentioned it when you were younger, perhaps giving you a heads up on what to expect. But until you have a really rough time of it and temporarily (one hopes) lose your mind, your identity, and your desire to full enjoy life you don’t really get it. You need to come to terms with the fact that is happening to you, and all the emotions that entails. We all have our own “journey” with menopause. But it’s generally an introspective time where posting selfies and screaming look at me! is not a valuable activity.
As for your war with Lisa Vanderpump. You can’t manipulate the queen of manipulation, darling. LVP will beat you every time. The wise move would have been to make her your ally. It’s much too late for that now.
Blowing wind to a minimized fire at this point was not what I had in mind for my rare outing when joining the girls for lunch so I left quite confused as to what went down and why this subject needed to be brought up once more by 2 friends that supposedly did not engage with the conversation to begin with. Kyle’s attitude particularly felt unauthentic to me and I still don’t quite understand why she is telling me to give her a break…… ?
You know who decides the tone and tenor of a filming? Here’s a hint, it’s not your expectation for your “rare outing.” The subject is being brought up because it is your storyline. You have nothing but your illness. It is all you talk about. You are on the show not making any sense at all. You don’t decide when the conversation that you introduced is over. Production does. This is just you grasping to sympathy from a audience whose sympathy was spent six concurrent syndromes ago.
a break for unauthenticly producing the show and creating added drama at my expense?
It’s interesting how the woman have gone from judging my health journey, my no make up look, my happy selfies, my sad selfies, my character, my integrity and now as Kathryn mentioned; My tone? Yes, my tone is strong…… I am 100% Dutch and proud of it, any one that was raised with a Germanic language will agree that our tone is strong especially once translated into English. I am righteous and not afraid to speak my truth, my delivery might not always be as diplomatic as I would like it to be but my words are truthful, spoken from the heart and to the point.
Maybe you are a bitch because you’re Dutch. But you’re still a bitch.
Yes, Lisa R has come into this group of woman and consistently labeled people without any qualification to do so but at least she owns her shit and I trusted we moved on.
Yet you keep randomly bringing her up. Like now? Why are you blowing wind on this diminishing fire, when you new target is Kyle?
LVP and Kyle could take a lesson from her in that department as both of them are the Queens of brushing things under the carpet and holding grudges!
LVP, yes. Kyle? Not so much.
I went home feeling exhausted and confused, I struggled with processing the conversation especially under the pressure of having camera’s there. I chose to marinate on the situation and express myself later when I had clarity. l wrote the following letter to Kyle and cc’d it to ALL the girls in order to AVOID more gossip, forwarding or deconstruction of my words. I see now that the letter was cut into pieces, recited by each cast member and that the sentiment of the letter has gone to waste…… I would like to share with you the letter I wrote to Kyle;
Oh we get the sentiment.
Dear Kyle, September 2015
After marinating on what went down yesterday i wanted to bring a couple of things to your attention;
i am coming out of a 3 year ordeal of living in a mentally paralized cocoon, due to a infection in my brain called NEUROBORRELIOSIS something you might want to research in case you would like to have a better understanding of Lyme disease, the biggest global epedemic in today’s world.
See? Let’s stop right there. The condescension. The permission to research your illness, but not consider the obvious Munchausen symptoms you are exhibiting. “The worst leaking boobs the doctor had seen in 9,000 surgeries!” “The biggest global epidemic in todays world!” You should learn the word ‘pandemic” by the way, it’s even more catastrophic. And consider coming down with Zika virus next, it’s all the rage. But for some reason you are obsessed with the term AIDS epidemic and therefore REALLY want to convince your idiot fans that Lyme Disease is an epidemic. It’s not. No matter how many of those green posters fraught with false statements you post hoping morons will pass them around and repost them. This is clear Munchausen behavior.
Also, pick a starting point for your suffering and stick with it. I constantly say I’ve been sitting on this couch for four years, but I realized the other day it has been closer to six. But I am not sure of when it all started and I don’t sit around calculating it. I’m only doing it now, because I’m as “the end of that journey” and looking back at “that brief stupid moment in my life” as famed philosopher Kristen Doute would say.
I arrived with a great attitude yesterday and proud of myself for making it out of bed and joining you girls. For you to go down so hard on me in order to create drama or what you think is good TV is beyond my understanding and it left me quite confused. Living in a very isolated world i am not used to being attacked in such an unkind way. its taken me some time to digest it. As far as i knew Lisa Rinna and our incident was clearly resolved at Erica’s house.
Yes, we get it. It was a triumphant moment for you. How dare they not celebrate that and instead go on with the storyline of the episode. I mean you even brought flowers!
C.C is the producer of our show and as far as i know he is doing an excellent job. I do believe that the show is a collaboration of all of us but trying to co-produce with such a desperate measures felt extremely unauthentic to say the least. I am just trying to catch up and participate. I don’t need your pity but i do ask you kindly to respect my situation. Your lack of compassion and understanding is not a pretty look.
He’s doing an excellent job? He is the one that drives the storyline you are bitching about. How nice of you to concern yourself with Kyle’s looks. I know how important looks are to you.
I also would like to clarify with you that my deal with Bravo and Evolution was based on “the best of my ability” whether that is filming 3 or 30 times this season so i would appreciate it if you lower your expectations of how much i should participate in filming.
I think all of your cast mates are free to discuss your level of filming. Especially since RHOBH is the one franchise that pays at a per season rate and not at a per episode rate. I’ve never worked anywhere that people didn’t speculate on how much people are getting paid for various positions.
Sitting at home, staring at the ceiling waiting for my brain to heal is not a choice for me but unfortunately the cards life has dealt me.
i am already feeling unaccomplished as it is, so please don’t make me feel like i am not holding up my part of the bargain here. If I was out living life with my family and friends, sitting front row at fashion week with my girls (emphasis mine) and not show up to work i would understand your frustration with me but unfortunately that is not the case. So Please trust me when i say; I am doing the best that i can! Like you I want to make the best show possible but I can’t do more then i do for reasons you will probably never understand.
We have 2 strong beautiful new housewives (Erica & Kathrine) that given a chance could help make a great season.
I think you vastly overestimate Kyle’s role in production. As you mentioned, she is not the show runner. She is first and foremost a cast mate. She does not have editorial control to make you (or herself for that matter) look like the villain or the hero. Kyle has done nothing to you this season. It seems you are using her to have your temper tantrum over not being appreciated simply for showing up. You are angry she is defending LVP and you may have finally learned not to go there. You perceive her to be a soft target, and frankly, it’s a bad look. You are ill, yet you signed a contract to work. You could have stayed home with your lemons and ocean view. You chose to be on a reality show. Now you have contractual obligations to meet. Stop your whining.
Lets have coffee next week and talk about this further in person.
(Kyle never wrote back, I now learned why)
You have got to be fucking kidding me. You just sent a mass email bitching at someone and then invite her to coffee so you can bitch and complain some more?
I like to believe that Rinna did not anticipate the ripple effect of her action when reciting the definition of “Munchhausen” on national TV and how that would effect my family, my children and millions of others who suffer from this debilitating invisible chronic disease, who all identify with the experience of doubt and judgement.
And we are back blowing wind on a diminishing fire. Seriously? Rinna should ignore all the Munchausen flags because you have children? These same children that are your convenient excuse for not “jumping?” The same children you randomly assign Lyme disease to while they are in the middle of their prime modeling years? The children who you have whackadoodle vials of magic serum made for an POST ON INSTAGRAM? Those children? You clearly are brain damaged.
I reached out to Lisa R when her father passed away as I felt great compassion for her loss, it’s during those times when we are humbly reminded that we’re just human ,we all suffer in silence through difficult times and loss in our lives. For that i have great compassion……
“The vault” to me means: a safe and vulnerable space in our hearts – where we share a certain integrity and keep each other’s wellbeing as our first priority- I don’t feel the need to share private matters off any of these women or their families because I care for them as human beings and exposing private matters to the public would just make me feel like a distrustful human being. I really don’t feel the need to put others down in order to build myself up which seems to be the motto around here.
Now you want to randomly drag the death of Rinna’s father into your insanely long rant to prove your compassion for others? That is sick behavior. Mentally ill behavior. And to follow that with more “things in your vault” implying just as Kim Richards did at the height of her disease that you have private matters on the women you could expose to the public? Using veiled threats to show how compassionate you are is very strange indeed.
I am not interested in competing with anyone, I hope we’re all successful…… In whatever our personal journey might be.
That’s a lie.
I except the fact that by sharing my journey I opened up a space for debate…….
That’s a lie.
debate is good when done with the right intent and kindness. Debate and transparency is what the Lyme community needs in order to bring awareness and education. It just makes me sad to see the judgement and ignorance that comes with it, for all involved, including my own children.
Again with the children shield.
“Lyme disease” just last week, February 2016 met the NIH’s 8 characteristics of a WORLD WIDE PANDEMIC! Hopefully this will get the attention of the medical community and I pray it brings us one step closer to speeding up the process of finding answers, that will ultimately lead us to the cure that we all deserve.
This is a COMPLETE Lie that she is trying to propagate via her Instagram. These 8 characteristics were pulled from a discussion about Pandemic Influenza. Then one of the idiot Lyme doctors, Dr. Daniel Cameron, made a graphic saying (according to him) Lyme disease is a “worldwide pandemic.” I can’t begin to discuss all the ways it is ridiculous. Cameron wrote a 2010 article “Proof that Chronic Lyme Disease Exists” in the journal Interdisciplinary Perspectives on Infectious Disease. It has been greatly disputed. The man is ridiculous.
Here is a negative review of him posted TODAY on this review site where his overall reviews are very positive. Expect it to be gone soon.
“by Tracy on Feb 24th, 2016
This practice is a complete sham. Dr. Cameron charges exorbitant fees for the initial evaluation. The patients who see him are usually having severe symptoms and will pay anything to get relief. He did not even send Lyme titres and his office spent the next month trying to cover that error! I was on antibiotics for one month and he suggested I continue because my symptoms were so severe. I saw another doctor after that conversation. I was diagnosed with Polymyalgia Rheumatica, treated with steroids and had relief of most symptoms in 3 days! Yes you can easily get an appt, if you have enough money! I suggest you find another doctor, save yourself pain, money and aggravation.
He’s another money grabber.
Elton John’s “FIGHT FOR AIDS” inspires me every day, When AIDS first appeared three decades ago, it was first seen as a “gay disease.”
That judgement at that time could not have been further from the truth….
Tens of thousands of gay men, some of them very close to me were dying and it seemed like no one cared. People who contracted HIV/AIDS were doubted and shunned by their own families, turned away from medical providers and treated like they weren’t even human.
Today, thanks to the persistent hard work of Elton and activists, HIV/AIDS is no longer a death sentence. Instead, it is a manageable chronic illness. We know how to prevent it. We know how to treat it. And someday, we may learn how to cure it.
This literally makes me want to vomit to read. My stomach is churning….I am so livid reading this shit.
There is a dangerous lack of compassion for those living with and dying of chronic Lyme disease…….
Once I personally experienced the stigma around this disease, I decided I could help the Lyme community by authentically sharing my journey. I have joined forces with the Global Lyme Alliance and other Lyme organizations in order to raise funds for research, proper diagnostics and a cure affordable for all. I use my platform to bring awareness to this crisis because I truly believe that it is the higher purpose of my journey.
Sham doctors and grabs for self pity. All for spousal support.
Once I get well, I want to do more…… I would like to start a non profit Organisation that provides care for those who fall on the wayside of our medical system. I would like to one day write a book and download all I’ve learned and share the treatments I have done but for now I have laser beam focus on getting myself and my children well so that we can get back to the healthy and vibrant life we deserve to live!
We’re like 3 race horses champing at the bit to move on from this, Trust Me!!
As soon as the spousal support kicks in, I will be cured! And so will my children! And my book will be published!
I am hopeful and confidant that more Lymies will keep this conversation going and that celebrities and influential people effected by this disease will stop suffering in silence and have the courage to start sharing their journey as well because together we have the power to make a difference — each and every one of us.
At the end of the day that’s my goal and that’s where I’d like to keep my focus.
Thank you for all your support!
I really, seriously, no hyperbole feel like I might throw up. The sheer AUDACITY of this woman makes me ill.