WWHL With Vanderpump Rules’ James and Lala: So Much Cursing and They Claim Jax Has STDs!

WWHL james and Lala

 

Okay, I am just getting in a very long Vanderpump Rules recap by Xanadude up here and am running very late on a midnight deadline  I’m going to have to make this a quick as possible.

We start with a montage of Tom Tom accidently offering to work for Pandora for free. Because, idiots. Since I wasn’t recapping I could actually look at the TV more.  Was that the first time we have seen Sandoval with no makeup? He’s quite the freckle face.

Meanwhile we are on the third montage. The last two were about James. Is he Andrew’s latest twink crush? Is it just me or does James sees to really be playing up his accent tonight?

Oh look another montage. Jax and Kentucky.  Dude, WE JUST WATCHED THE SHOW. Lala says that Jax is an idiot.  Andy very seriously asked James to let him bite him after the show.

Clearly Lala and James are together. I think they are a good match. Unless they have to find their way home from the bus stop together or something.

How can you not love this level of delusion. Isn't that the point of these shows?

How can you not love this level of delusion. Isn’t that the point of these shows?

Lots of callers seem very pro Kristen, which is reassuring some of my faith in humanity.  James sticks to his story that Kristen cheated on him while modeling in Kansas, or Utah or Toledo.  I’m going to actually give James that one.  When someone with a history of cheating goes to El Paso to “model” then …. I mean. Come on.

Andy asks Lala what she thinks of all the sexist things that Jax says about her on camera. Lala’s brow furrows in deep contemplation. She cusses a lot which all gets bleeped and ends with “…it doesn’t make any sense…”  She has no idea what Jax is implying. Because, Box of Hair.  Then she rants saying “Anyway, I am like a sports car! Who doesn’t want a sports car?” Then Andy uses his  dismissive voice “Okaay…” that I imagine him using when Phaedra tries to thrust her children in his path. I don’t think Andy likes kids any more than Phaedra does.  At any rate, Andy just tries to move on. Lala randomly says “Okay.”  I heard her name is Lala because that was the only word she could say until like age 17.  Alledgedly.  Because, not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree.

Do I need to mention that both guests appear to be full of ….spirits of some sort?

I think Lala is severely impaired. All the questions are too hard for her. The caller asked “Are you still friends with Kristen and do you like her?”  She responded with facial tics and grunting and possibly a “naaaaah” in there somewhere. I’m starting to suspect lead paint on her crib.

James tells his George Michael childhood fabrications. According to a TT commenter with a lot of time on her hands whose name escapes me,  James’ father is one of George Michael’s relations who sold false stories about him to the tabloids when James was around five years old. Allegedly.  James says they spent every Christmas together until he was 11 and George’s dog was his best friend.  He does admit that they no longer speak because his father and George had a falling out. He is in James’ prayers though. Because clearly he’s quite religious. He’s wearing a cross and everything!

James gets pissy about all of the questions about how disrespectful he is towards women.  He says, “Okay, look! I am just going to make this brief! I can’t be respectful to someone who is not going to respect me back!”

We have the third long diatribe of profanity that has to be bleeped and Andrew is getting pissed. I’m not saying a single “fucking” slipped out. Both of them have had multiple sentences in a row bleeped.  And Lala is completely incoherent yet trying to cut of James’ drinking.

People keep asking Lala if she trusts people like Kristen, Lauren, and James.  She manages to get out that the only people she trusts are her mommy and daddy. I’m sure they are so proud of her.

Someone asked them to sing their “Feeling you up” song.  Or whatever it is. And they do. It’s interesting that Lala turns into a black female singer and James is Vanilla Ice, but it almost worked.  Andy was pleased and says they just redeemed themselves from their constant cursing.  Lisa Vanderpump is going to sell James’ latest CD a SUR. He says SUR makes over  $100k a year just selling hats at the restaurant. I’m pretty sure he was not supposed to share that info. Potential #Lawsuit1.  Ken and Todd are “producing his album.” Well,  THEY WERE.

Andy tells James that is a good marketing plan and James then says, “Yeah unlike Jax who……and we get 15 more seconds of James cursing followed by Andy being back to furious. Has he ever throw anyone off the show before? Because he is close.

The play a stupid game. It goes on for about 20 seconds and again they both start cussing constantly. The majority of this show will not make it to air. Andy will never have these two back on. He stops the game and goes to commercial to yell at them some more.  There are only five minutes left. I expect them to be gone when we return, if not dead.

So, after the break, they are still there and Andy reads tweets from Jax and Kristen blasting them. So guess what happens next? Did you guess that James went on another swearing round?  And then Lala implies that she has a secret about Jax and why she would never sleep with him.  James blurt out that “It’s called herpes!”  Andy has never been this disgusted ever.  And soon we will have ANOTHER  Beverly Hills lawsuit about genitalia accusations on WWHL! If you are counting at home that is  Potential #Lawsuit2

My God. Can we just get through this?  Andy gives Lala and James the jackhole. And it’s mercifully over! Just like their careers.

95 Comments

Filed under Vanderpump Rules, Watch What Happens Live, WWHL

95 responses to “WWHL With Vanderpump Rules’ James and Lala: So Much Cursing and They Claim Jax Has STDs!

  1. Hahahah very funny recap now I want to hear all this cussing! And yeah I want to see Andy mad lol!

    • mddc

      However, that’s the problem – we can’t “hear” them cussing. There was mostly just silence but with their lips moving as if the tv’s sound had cut off. I didn’t keep count but Andy guessed it was about eight times so you KNOW he was pissed. I was pissed too; it was annoying as hell but what else could I expect? Silent gaps aside, they are probably two of the most annoying people I’ve seen on these shows and considering the people on these shows, that says A LOT.

      • Yeah it was bad! The worst I’ve seen! I don’t know if James has been a bad influence on LaLa but I never noticed she had such a potty mouth either! Their mouths need to be soaked in ammonia!

  2. Xanadude

    Seriously, I’ve never seen Andy that mad. Brandy Glanville at least stopped cursing when instructed to, these two acted like they just didn’t care, which, if they were hopped up, of course they didn’t.
    and it’s one thing for us to joke about Jax, it’s another entirely to say on national television that someone has an STD.

  3. Anastasia_Beave

    Such a waste of me staying up late. I should have put on Seinfeld.

    I did laugh out loud when he said Jax had herpes.
    1. Duh
    2. What an idiot.

    • WonkyTonk

      I couldn’t believe he said the word. I figured they would just leave it at dirty, but nope! By their visceral reaction to Jax’s comments, and they comments they were making about it it’s looking like a fool blown feud between them and Jax. Man that reunion is going to be something else!

  4. Onelove

    The most hilarious wwhl I’ve ever seen. James and LaLa were wasted. Andy lost total control. Too bad these two morons aren’t bright enough to realize you don’t bite the hand that feeds you.

    • They figure since they’re the “stars” of the show now Andy owes them. Idiots.

      • fivecatsownme

        Yes, and to quote Heidi Klume, one minute you’re in; the next minute you’re out. The Bravo watching audience doesn’t have that much invested in them.

    • Sara

      Exactly. Because pissing the boss off always ends well…not.

    • Lisa

      It’s Andy’s fault. He should never stack those chairs with VR cast members unless they have a proven track record of less-than-horrible behavior.

      The VR Aftershow was created so that the Bravo viewers could get the inside information they are clamoring for without Andy having to pay to fly them to NY for WWHL.

      The Aftershow is pre-taped, so they can bleep more selectively, and the kids aren’t as nervous like they always seem to be on WWHL.

      I wonder what James said about Stassi at the end of the show. I listen to Stassi’s podcasts (she is actually very entertaining and painfully honest) and she recently said she thought James might be the antichrist, or a member of ISIS, as he is a despicable human being. She also said that she had been warned (presumably by Kristen) not to speak out about James, because he will fiercely retaliate against her.

      Stassi: I’m afraid he might come over to my house and kill me.

      Stassi also said that we will see more about how Jax’s shoplifting problem, as well as how he steals from everyone, including Lisa. Note that Stassi is very careful about what she says, telling us that she signed a strict contract, and that if she talks shit about people too much they will crucify her at the reunion.

      (FYI Now Ariana has a podcast, too, but I haven’t listened to it. “The Bevs”)

      • Denine

        I could be wrong, but I get the feeling James’ days are numbered. The only friend is gas in the cast is Lisa’s son, and he’s only got a very small part.

      • Denine

        In the cast I meant. I need to read more closely before I post.

  5. Meredith

    It was such a trainwreck. I couldn’t even make out what was being bleeped because it was just sentences. I can’t believe James said what he said about Jax. Andy looked so pissed even I was scared lol. I thought the funniest part was the poll question..or Lala responding to Jax’s sportscar comparison. #poorandy

  6. Vet

    What a mess. That was the worst show ever, he should have licked them off and spoke to the lady from Lulamom. Please Jax sue James please. Those two stupid drunk kids should be fired.

  7. Xanadude

    I said it last week and I’ll say it again – when JAX has the moral high ground in a fight, you know there’s some seriously messed up behavior going on. This may be the only time I ever say this: Go Jax, Go! All he has to do is prove he doesn’t have the herp or prove that this was a violation of medical privacy and he too can be wallowing in George Michael royalty money.

    • Theresa

      You are right, when Jax is the moral high fround…we’re all in trouble. These two were tweaking on who knows what last night!! I felt horrible for Andy!!

  8. Lisaj

    Your recap made me go get this episode out of the Dish delete pile and watch it. Andy you should have thrown them off the chairs and out the door.

  9. tamaratattles

    testing ( Sorry my not getting comments sent to Gmail… )

  10. Naomi

    Lala always looks constipated. Will work on that look over Christmas break lol. Love the coverage on here :-)

  11. WonkyTonk

    OMG I can’t believe they outed Jax for allegedly having herpes! I’ll bet Jax won’t evil tweet a WWHL Guest when the show is live ever again. They should have just left it at the dirty insinuation. Andy was offended, but you know that’s the sort of shit that happens when people get messy like Andy was by reading Jax’s evil tweet. But if you think about it it’s nothing that hasn’t been said many times before just not so publicly. I mean even Lisa on that show or maybe one of the Vanderpump rules reunion shows made out that he was dirty when he tried to kiss her once if I recall correctly. Throughout the entire interview they were defiant is probably the best way I can describe it. James has got a serious attitude. The man has no patience. I get what he was saying about not respecting Kristin because she never respected him, but he didn’t have to talk to the caller that way. I’m thinking he was a little drunk for the interview. It’s funny having watched LaLa say she’ll have nothing to do with James on Vanderpump Rules only to be essentially dating now. A lot must have happened this season.

    • tamaratattles

      You didn’t actually watch the show, Did you WonkyTonk? LOL. James might have been a little drunk you say?

      • WonkyTonk

        I did but I couldn’t tell if he was drunk or high, either of them actually. Hey my recording cut out before the results of the poll does anyone remember what it was? I’ll bet he still got an insanely high number of people saying they still wouldn’t date him. Oh man Andy was so mad. You know I love me some Andy in THAT way, but I gotta say though for all the shade Andy distributes on that show it’s kind of funny to see him that upset. Those two and their constant cussing had me laughing. I just wish I could make out what it was they were trying to say. That’s like three good shows in a row for WWHL. Well at least from my perspective.

      • Lisaj

        Wonky the poll question was 83% or higher that NO one would date him

      • WonkyTonk

        Thanks Lisaj!

      • Vet

        After watching it again, I think they were more high than drunk. Licking the teeth, glassy eyes, unable to sit still…

      • WonkyTonk

        Hey Vet, yeah I watched it and I knew James was drinking but I just couldn’t tell if he was acting that way from being alcohol happy, drunk, high or a combination. They both had that look about them that makes you, well me anyway, question.

  12. therealdeb

    I just couldn’t. I had this on in the background as i was talking to a friend who has a dancer in the nutcracker production and hearing all the neat stuff and she stops mid sentence and asked what the hell was on tv. I told her it was verbal diarrhea.

  13. This sounds like a horrible custerfuck. I wish I could watch it. Why bother bleeping the swearing? Is society still that precious?

  14. Good lord what a trainwreck. Just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse, James had to pull out the herpes. I hope andy gave them a verbal beatdown after the show along with a couple of puke buckets.

    Most unintentionally funny quote.. Lala: “Jax, you would never ever in your life have a chance with (pause, tongue click)..me” ?

  15. Jennifer Barton

    These two guests should be fired. Arrogance at its finest. Lala and James think they are real stars. I hope Andy puts them both in their place. .. which should be anywhere but the show. Lala is clasless and ditto to the person who says Jax should sue the crap outta them ! Lala needs to humble herself… no one likes a fake, less-than- BASIC, stuck up B**** !

  16. Sue

    Jax needs to sue there ass

    • More Tea Please!

      First he has to produce a clean lab result. (maybe Brooks Ayers could advise him on documentation…)

    • I agree with Sue. Whether he has it or not, one can’t simply announce on a TV show that someone has an std. If they said, Charlie Sheen has hiv, ok, Charlie himself announced it publicly. But it’s just in just seems wrong for them to say such an accusation on TV, whether it’s true or not.

  17. Jaana

    If herpes is the only STD Jax has well color me orange.

  18. Angel(?)

    I caught the last half of WWHL. I swear I only heard five words in one segment the rest was nothing but bleep. Andy was so pissed. I wanted him to toss James on air.

    These two (La la and James) deserves each other. Arrogance!

  19. This was a very strange WWHL to say the least. Andy seemed very pissy even before they started. And he was very nasally himself! I think the 3 of them were partying together before the show!

    • flip

      Glad I wasn’t the only one who thought Andy seemed cranky from the get go.

      • tamaratattles

        He tweeted about them being “two spitfires” a couple hours before the show. My assumption was they showed up very early for the free bar provided to guests before the show. We’ve seen James literally chugging from a giant bottle of liquor on #PumpRules. Clearly he needs a minder. And rehab.

  20. Matzah60

    Tamara, I am your commenter with too much time on their hands (self-confessed), but it was Lady Coccette who disclosed the real relationship between James and George Michael. I have never seen Andy that angry at both guests. The whole show seemed to be bleeped to the point that it was difficult to discern Lala and James’ answers.

    As you said, Andy seemed genuinely surprised that LVP and Ken were going to sell James’ album in their restaurant, as well as produce it. Of course James kept digging his grave, as well as that of LVP and Ken as he expanded the facts to answer Andy’s questions. Since anyone who hawks their goods on a Bravo reality show must share 25% of their earnings with Andy/Bravo (post Bethanny’s sale of Skinnygirl to Beam), I am very curious to see how this all plays out.

    James and Lala=Dumb and dumber

    • I admit I fell into James/George Michael hole last week (sorry). It’s a fascinating (and very sad) story of greed & famewhoring. Allegedly.

      • Yes, I found it odd how James’ mom sold a story that George was using a myriad of drugs about a year ago (I think), and needed rehab; meanwhile George himself said, don’t believe someone I haven’t even spoken to in 18 years. Just seems not cool.

      • Matzah60

        No reason to be sorry, Lady Cocette. The story was fascinating. As a retiree and an empty nester, as well as a news junkie, I am always interested in what’s going on with personalities and entertainer that were part of my life growing up. Like the poster, alexa2626, I had heard about Jame’s mother selling a story to the rags. It seems Jame’s mother is as much as a fame whore as her son. Allegedly!! The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. :)

    • I commented too about that and thought she was throwing some shade at me :)
      However there is a difference between “too much time on your hands” and being a life long fan of the singer and just happening to know a few details of the back story. I’m the latter.

      • Matzah60

        My comment was in response to some other commenter throwing some shade at me about something that had nothing to do with James and George Michael. He/she questioned if I had too much time on my hands. My response was directed at that commenter. Yes, I do have too much time on my hands for a very good reason. I am 61, almost about to turn 62. After working full time for 30 years and raising my kids as a single parent, my days went from too much to do to being an empty nester with too much time on my hands. The whole thing was taken out of context.

  21. Kika

    Why didn’t Bravo bleep the herpes accusation? Sounds like they were okay with it getting out; did they just miss it or do they only bleep cursives?

    James admits that he is using his parent’s divorce as an excuse to drink and act out. How can his mother possibly be proud of him? What is her story?

    • Xanadude

      I think that when a muting occurs, it takes a second or two to reset. You could shut off a mike and take care of the problem permanently, but I think when you hit the swear/cough button it takes a second or two to reset once you release it.

      • Sequoia

        That’s true for the live feed but not so.much for the other three time zones. They could have just cut the offending voice out of the program.

      • Wouldn’t Bravo be liable for slander if James is found guilty of defamation? Bravo did ‘publish’ his defamatory statement (of it is untrue). Whether accidental or not.

      • Wait… I think that ‘accidental’ publication is an american defence. You could argue that it wasn’t accidental if subsequent broadcasts after the live feed aired, still contained the statement.

      • Matzah60

        I have a nephew that works in broadcasting who says that there is a 5 to 10 second delay on the feed that goes out to viewers. The person in charge of censor views looks at two streams, one that is the live action and the other being a feed that is going out to viewers on delay.

        Since bleeping is done for profanity and classified info (Jax has herpes), it seems to have been human error that caused the info to go live. Still, it would seem that since almost the entire half hour was bleeped out, perhaps someone in the control room allegedly chose to have said comment air live. However, @MichaelHay made a good point about subsequent broadcasts. I wonder if the comment appeared ‘On Demand’.

  22. Hahaha thank goodness for On Demand! If Andy could take out a stock and beat those two he would! They cussed incessantly! I enjoyed watching Andy get upset! Karma!

  23. Meredo

    I was in complete shock watching these two on WWHL. I guess they thought that since they are so popular now that they can act and say whatever they want! Wrong! I have never seen Andy so pissed and I think (hope) there will be repercussions for their atrocious behavior. Not sure what it will be though as it seems Vanderpump Rules is mainly about James and Lala. I guess we’ll have to wait and see if they get away with this total debacle on WWHL.

  24. NikkiM85

    I just could not believe how ignorant they both were… And with no remorse whatsoever! I swore Andy was going to flip his chair, snatch off his mic and verbally tear into their asses! They looked so dumb and clueless. I can’t even… They are so low class! So disgusting! I HOPE they get cut from the show! And I pray LVP and Ken doesn’t promote James because he is not a good look for her and her name! I just… I wanted to go through the tv and choke out both of them! IDIOTS!

  25. Spilledperfume

    If I didn’t know to expect the cursing (from reading the recap before I watched the show on Demand) I would have thought I was having cable issues. Half the show was bleeped.

    I think think Andy should have James and LaLa back and invite Amber Rose back. Between all of the cursing Amber could sit there and refuse to answer questions. It would Epic!

  26. JoJo

    These 2 reached new skanky diva heights surpassing the worst I’ve seen from the rest of the cast who have been on WWHL. Even the rare, non-bleeped part of their comments were unintelligible.
    And I agree, James did sound like he was embellishing – overacting – his Brit accent. He’s commented more than once on the show that his accent is his calling card for chicks. He must have called Andy ‘mate’ about 50 times, acting like they are now best buds.
    I think with this appearance, LaLa and James succeeded in being the most vile of VPR children. The upside for the rest of VPR could benefit Jax and maybe even Stassi when she turns up later!

  27. Candice

    I just watched the episode on DVR. WOW – that was painful. I was actually embarrassed for LaLa and James and their behavior. Usually they are at least entertaining in their lack of control and stupidity/immaturity, but to watch them behave with such poor taste in an interview on live television was disconcerting. I don’t like being a critic of others because no one is perfect; however, they were pretty low class and it didn’t even make for a good show! Andy looked visibly agitated. I would be too, after repeatedly telling someone not to do something and they disregard. Let’s just hope they grow up… At some point.

  28. JoJoFLL

    I don’t know if that was the best WWHL or the worst WWHL I’ve ever seen.

  29. Theresa

    What these two goofballs don’t get is they outed themselves….Lala sleeps with James, James slept w/ Kristin, Kristin slept with Jax!! If Jax has what they say he does, then chances are good they have it to! At this point, half of Sur’s staff have the same STD since they all sleep with the same people. That is scary!!

  30. Theresa

    Just watched it on my dvr and hold crap. I would have thought my sound cut out and I needed a new TV if not for tt. Andy was slimmed in his chair raging. It was fun to watch knowing what to look for I suspect these 2 won’t be back next season.

  31. Josie

    Someone was smart enough to type a heartfelt apology from Lala in twitter. I dont believe she is smart enough to spell so I doubt she composed it herself. Anyway, Andy retweeted it. James tweeted an apology to Andy too but we only heard the crickets. Lol

  32. janet

    I thought maybe Jax had herpes, because there is some kind of deep real hurt and issue between him and Stassi, and it was ongoing they said. The guy gets around, so I kinda put two and two together. James is probably wanting to make sure his new girlfriend doesnt ever go to bed with Jax, no matter how many fights they get into. Im afraid some people are not honest about herpes and will recklessly expose you, so James sorta did a public service. I would want the info to make a decision to have sex or not, because the decision would be NO. Guys will leave that out and roll the dice, so to speak.

    • What is the relevance of Stassi and jax here? Are you saying maybe he gave it to her? Allegedly.

      • janet

        It was hinted at that Jax gave Stassi herpes, or at least thats how I took it as did others. They said he had really messed with her life and its something she is still dealing with to this day. I thought herpes because of it being on going.

      • Thanks Janet. I must’ve missed that little detail. I guess mother was right. Don’t lie with dogs unless you wanna get fleas!

  33. janet

    Im going to have to watch this on demand, as I missed it. Sounds like it would be funny to watch. Im not going to stick up for them, but I will say all those cast members party hard, or at least most of them do. Jax is probably the biggest partier of them all, and lets not forget the sunglasses theft in Hawaii. So I wouldn’t expect LVP to do anything drastic. The show would be a bore, if it didnt have this craziness. James at least has some genuine talent.

  34. Both Lala and James are grovelling to Andy on Twitter now.

    Also, apparently Lala did some podcast interview with two guys where she describes having blackout sex with James and one of the hosts points out how in some countries that constitutes rape. Lala denies being raped/victimized and states she had known James for ages so he didn’t take advantage of her.

    So disgusting. Both of them.

  35. Queen of the Nile

    I’m still laughing about this post — especially all of the Lala comments. The best one might have been the likelihood of lead paint on her crib. Or was it Lala as her only word until 17? Thanks, TT!

  36. Lolagyrl

    Herpes? Really kids? Get it together. 1 in 6 people in the US has genital herpes. Oral herpes (cold sores) is even more common – in fact the day majority (over 80% of us) will have HSV1 before we die. It doesn’t really matter if one has HSV1 or 2. It’s statistically likely more than one member of the cast has one kind of herpes or the other. Attitudes like Lala & James’ – calling people dirty – are exactly what fosters the spread of STIs. Testing, treatment, open & honest communication, & the use of barrier protection is what prevents them. Anyone want to take any bets on either of these two participating in any of that healthy decision making? Yep. Didn’t think so. These guys are the worst.

    • I bet 80% of the Sur staff has the herp. (The one “down there”) I sure hope they practice good hand hygiene there. Im sure James will come down with the herp very soon if he doesn’t have it already.

  37. Bleech, this is probably not the ish LVP was hoping for when thinking a reality show would be great advertising for her restaurants. Good looking staff, decor and food, with a side of drama and STD’s…… No thanks, nope

  38. Xanadude

    TT- an opportunity to add new tags to the VPR related posts :)

  39. Best part was watching smoke come out of Andy’s ears. Thanks for the recap, TT!

  40. karen

    James is very immature, acts like a teen in heat, is without a filter and completely unlikable.

    • janet

      I thought James was more likeable last year when he was with Kristen. His DJ status is probably going to his head, and hes young still. The others are ten years or more older and starting to settle down now. Big difference. Hopefully James doesn’t get in over his head with the drugs and alcohol that they all do. As far as the herpes thing with Jax, it did not come out on the on demand version. The funny thing with herpes is, not everyone gets it that sleeps with someone who has it. May be a factor of luck, not an active break out, immune system and such. I have a family member who was married to someone who got herpes. Not sure if he cheated or what, but he tried to blame her and she never tested positive or had a break out. They were married ten years and she never got it. She said they were careful when he had a break out. Then I know a relative that gave herpes to a guy and she didn’t know she had it and tested positive even though she never had a break out. Most of the time they dont test for genital herpes routinely only if you have a break out or are afraid you were exposed as its a somewhat unreliable test. You definatly can not trust people to be honest about herpes. You better assume they might.

  41. Hats off to TT – that was one of your funniest recaps ever! I spilled coffee on myself giggling.

  42. T D

    What if he caught it from the toilet seat that jumped right up ‘ n grabbed his meat?

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