We’ll we are back to the shit stirring house husbands of New Jersey. Jim has announced that he has passed the bar (hmm I wonder what state that was in, I can’t seem to find any record of it) but that the is not an attorney. Then in the next breath he is screaming in Joe Gorga’s ear that he “prosecutes bank fraud cases” and “works for the same Attorney General’s office that is prosecuting Juicy Joe.” Um, hey there Mr. I Passed the Bar. Federal fraud cases are prosecuted by an AUSA . Sidenote: Jim’s second twitter account in as many days was suspended again just minutes ago. What the hell is he doing to get suspended? Is threatening to sue the entire Internet a banable offense on Twitter? Pity if true because it was really funny. He was also suing Bobby for breach of contract for some nonsense that seemed to be Bravo related. He is also ranting against Bravo who I am assuming is who really is having his accounts suspended. This guy is a joke.
Currently, he has Joe Gorga up in his face outside of Bobby’s house. Let’s watch how this turns out for him. He’s already threatening to call the cops. I’m sure he will be threatening to sue him any second. Oh and on his first twitter account, Good Ole Christian Jim said suing people was like sport fucking to him. Do they not run psych tests on any of these people?
Jim’s nutbar talking head about why he doesn’t do fights. ” I’m trained as an attorney. If I want to hurt you, I’m going to sue you. I’m going to leverage your house. (I’m gonna let you finish Jim, but I don’t think you know what the word leverage means. I’m Just Saying) I’m going to give you three years of hell in a courtroom, I’m going to bleed you dry financially, I’m going to humiliate you as I depose you for 8 hours, and make you my bitch.”
Amber doesn’t have her keys. She asks Teresa to go get them for her because she doesn’t want to go back in. But Jim, in his infinite wisdom says he is going back in with her to get them.
Nicole is very upset that Amber and Jim caused a scene in front of people she has to see at the postal office and the Dunkin Donuts.
This show is so nuts this blog might not be done until midnight. The shit that flies out of Jim Marchese’s mouth is unbelievable. Teresa stupidly pulled them aside to confront him about saying that he didn’t want to associate with the Giudices. Jim launches into this whole bullshit story about the children and drinking and the safety of the Giudice family…none of it makes any sense. Teresa asks him again and he says he is the President of a “unsupervised title two bank.” There is no such think as an unsupervised bank. All banks in this country are supervised (aka overseen by the government and held to strict regulations). He is (or was) I’ve seen some paperwork that his company is no longer in existence, allegedly. I didn’t really care enough to investigate. But Mortgage Now is an unsupervised mortgage lending company. The only “Title 2” I am aware of has to do with the Americans with Disabilities Act. He says that his company prosecutes mortgage fraud. That is a ridiculous claim. In fact his company was investigated by the State of Washington for improper practices and he lost his license to have a mortgage company there. You see, Jim, the GOVERNMENT prosecutes fraud. They person running the fraudulent mortgage company does not. The Jim demands to know if anyone has an IQ about 12!!! I can’t stop laugh at this fool.
Dina says in her talking head, “Jim Marchese. The magnitude of his douchebaggery could clean a whales vagina.” Amen, Dina. Amen.
Nicole and Bobby fight. Nicole says that if Bobby ever speaks to Amber again she is done with Bobby. I don’t blame her.
Teresa and Joe have two huge dogs in a dog run in the back yard. What good do they do fenced in an enclosure? Maybe they are just in there for filming. Juicy has a surprise! He has bought some live chickens and a rooster. Because that is in the Martha Stewart Book of PrePrison Protocols. Or something. The chickens are nasty. Only Milania and Juicy like the chickens.
Dina had a bad date with the dude from the party.
Bobby goes over to Amber and Jim’s to try to fix things. Amber and Jim both lie. Bobby cuts all ties with them. Smart move Bobby.
The twins go over to Melissa’s. They all get along and talk about Jim.
Welp, the chickens didn’t last long. I guess the guard dogs were tempted by their tasty goodness and one of them got out and ate a couple of the chickens. So Joe and Rosie and Milania go to buy a few more chickens. Rosie is so sweet to Juicy and tells him she is just a phone call away if he wants to go out and grab a beer or something and get him mind off things.
Dina and Teresa got to meet Amber at a spa. Amber apologizes on Jim’s behalf. The girls get a bird shit facial. No. I am not kidding. It doesn’t seem to help Amber to fake cry for sympathy. I would have thought that the bird shit near the eyes would have helped with fake tear production. That hypothesis is now out the window. Amber says she is going to be like Jesus and forgive Melissa. Because Amber and Jim are good Christian people.
Lexi and Dina get matching tattoos.
Nicole and Bobby go to a gun range to blow off some steam. Nicole and Bobby are much closer now that he has gotten rid of Jim and Amber.
Amber and Melissa go to lunch to try to mend fences. Amber lies again and accuses Melissa of lying. Melissa is over Amber. Amber better hope Teresa and Dina will still speak to her.