Marriage Boot Camp Reality Stars: Fate Comes Knocking

marriage_boot_reality1-592x330It’s time for the penultimate episode of this ridiculousness. Roger caved and went with Jenni to her event. Tanisha gets a phone call from her manager saying she got a part. She is screaming and crying and Clive asks her what is going on. She walks right past him and says nothing. So this whole communication workshop stuff is going well. She goes out to the kitchen to tell everyone the good news. These phone calls with Tanisha give me the distinct impression there is no one on the other end of the phone.  First she says she auditioned for something and they said she is “pretty much hired.”  Then she tells the group she auditioned for a lot of stuff and got it all. Never once did she say what this role, or all of the roles are. It’s all fake.

Speaking of fake, Gretchen and Slade bicker in bed. Slade is emotionally exhausted.

The stupid exercise of the week is called Release Me.  They are supposed to think of the person for whom they have the most resentment. Slade says his resentment is toward God. He is angry that God let his son have brain cancer. He gives a crappy performance of crying and whining.

Tanisha is up next. Her resentment is her “caretaker” that abused her as a child. Tanisha sort of freaks out. She wants to hit the girl pretending to be the caretaker. She actually asks Clive for support!  Jim steps in as the caretaker in case Tanisha does decide to knock a bitch out. Jim provokes Tanisha to hit her. Tanisha is melting down. Jim asks who is forgiveness for and the female therapist whispers, “Yooooou, it’s for you sweetie…” in the most hysterical way possible I don’t see how Gretchen or someone did not just bust out laughing. Soap opera music swells. Tanisha forgives!

MBC tanisha_clive_Kevin is mad at his Daddy.  He was not there growing up. Gretchen needs to forgive herself. Ryan is mad at his ex who cheated. Traci is angry at a friend who left her in hard times. Trista is mad at some chick. There are a lot of tears and everyone forgives everybody.  And then it is Clive’s turn. He is angry at…Tanisha. Tanisha saw herself in the person portraying her. In this exercise, the person playing Tanisha apologizes for not showing him respect. This exercised sucked.

Tanisha asks Slade if she were his daughter would he be able to accept Tanisha staying married to Clive.  SHE ASKED SLADE. Not Ryan, not Jim, but Slade. Jeez Louise!  And Slade said, “I would not.” Dramatic music. Commercial break.

After the break, Clive, who has been counseled by Kevin stands up to Tanisha. Tanisha doesn’t communicate with him n any meaningful way. Clive says he’s done, drops the mike and goes back inside.

Time for another game! YAY! Is there a drinking word? No, each partner has to make a choice between two things. The therapists feel that one is a selfless choice and the other is a selfish choice. This should be fun. Especially because Gretchen and Slade are up first. Slade’s choices are to heal himself or stay with Gretchen. How would healing himself be selfish? Of course he should choose that. Gretchen’s choices are motherhood or Slade. Okay, Jim tells Slade that if he chooses the Gretchen door then he will never be able to meet her needs. Gretchen is told that if she chooses Slade then she is choosing never to be a mother. Slade chooses to heal himself. Gretchen chose motherhood.

Kevin and Traci. Kevin’s choice is odd. He can choose stay with Traci but always come behind her sisters and her life. Or door #2, be First in someone else’s life. Traci has to choose Kevin as her first priority or her sisters and her career as her priority. Kevin chooses Traci.  Traci chooses Kevin. Hugs and tears.

Trista and Ryan.  Trista has to choose between the Ryan that Trista wants him to be and the real Ryan. Ryan has to choose whether to be the Ryan that Trista wants or the real Ryan. The doors are really confusing. Jim is explaining to Ryan in a way that says either be what Trista likes or leave her.  Not surprisingly they chose different doors. It was all very confusing. Trista chose the door that would have Ryan be the person she wants him to be. Even they don’t understand the doors after it was over.

Tanisha and Clive.  Clive has to decide between having a career  without Tanisha, or choose Tanisha.  Tanisha has the same choice more or less. I hope they both choose their own career. YAY! They do just that. Tanisha is furious with Clive for not choosing her. I thought Tanisha was going to die on this show. What is taking so long?

Jenni and Roger are back just in time for the final decisions tomorrow. Tanisha and Clive get into it. Tanisha is being her usual cunty self. Tanisha blows up and start beating on Clive. Then Tanisha decides she is having a heart attack. Bitch ain’t having no heart nothing. She’s just trying to flip the script after realizing she was trying to beat down her husband on national TV. They call an ambulance and Ryan, who is an EMT takes her history and gives her an aspirin. Jenni bitches about not being able to go to sleep after a long day of traveling because some chick is doing her best Fred Sanford impersonation upstairs. Oh the horror. Ryan asks if she knows where she is. She says yes. He asks what state. She says earth. See? She’s fine. Dumb as ever and fine. Nothing to see here.

Oh look, there she is right back in the house for the final decision the next day. Please dump her ignorant ass, Clive.


Filed under Reality Show, Reality TV, Recap

41 responses to “Marriage Boot Camp Reality Stars: Fate Comes Knocking

  1. khintx

    Tanisha repeated verbally and physically assaults Clive, slapping and punching him about the head, neck and shoulders. Why don’t they address this? kh

  2. Kelli

    Tanisha, somehow got a part in season three of OITNB. Go figure. I’m guessing she will be playing a role she knows all to well, the angry, black woman. No, I’m not racist people because im a black woman too.

  3. HannahKingRose

    The door exercise thing was confusing for everyone. Even the perfect McPerfectsons Trista and Ryan didn’t get this one right. Who comes up with these exercises? I think Tanisha pulled the fake heart attack card so in case Clive decides to ditch her next week during the finale, she can use it if he also decides on a domestic violence case. Why in the world are you going to hit your spouse on national t.v.? I think she should have pretended to pass out and then not be able to remember what happened the last few days. Now that would help with her case much better than a heart attack.

  4. HannahKingRose

    Have I been a bad girl? Is that why I’m sitting on the little stool facing the moderation corner? I is sorry for being a bad, bad girl. I won’t do it again until the next time. I promise.

  5. I hope things work out for Clive. He needs to concentrate on himself because Tanisha is crazy!

  6. It seems to me that Tanisha tries so hard to be disliked. And it is easy to dislike her, she’s a loud mouth, unfiltered, bitch. Something has to be seriously wrong with Clive that is not visible, except that he is married to this train wreck of a person. Clive doesn’t want to lose her? Why? If I was Clive, I’d find the nearest door and disappear into the good night never to be seen again by Tanisha. And she beat on him too. She is so ignorant. Bad stuff happens to people all the time but they don’t act like her. How did she even get on TV and for what? I don’t even know who she is. And I’ll never speak about her again.

  7. Who’s the really fat one? She needs Celebrity Fit Camp more than this crappy tardfest.

  8. Cat

    So…now that these “counselors” have done the “selfish vs. selfless” exercise, what’s next? An exercise on the dangers of “all or nothing” thinking? Where did these counselors get their degrees? Or are they just actors playing doctors on tv?

    Jim and Elizabeth and the other two who seem to play guard dog are getting really creepy. For some reason, it reminds me of the “club” from “Stepford Wives”. “You are leaving? You MUST return. There is more work to be done.” (Insert evil laugh here.)

  9. TT, you need to write a script, this is by far the funniest summary of a show I have ever read, I can’t stop laughing…..thanks for making a rainy day, absolutely wonderful…LOLOLOLOLOL.

  10. ScrappieONE

    Does Tanisha really realize what an a$$ she makes of herself or does she just think everyone fears her because she’s a bada$$…. I pick door number 2.

  11. Valley Girl

    Thank You for the recap. I tried my level best to get through that episode last night and couldn’t. I’m so over Tanisha and Gretchen and Slade I don’t know want to do.

  12. ScrappieONE

    Okay, did I do something wrong or was I bad because my prior comment is still in moderation.

  13. fivecatsownme

    Your recaps are better than the shows. I quit watching this season of marriage boot camp because it was so boring. Do you think Ramona and Mario will be on the next season? I can just see Ramona notching about no Ramona pinot, and how the maid service sucks.

  14. diamondgigi

    My mouth is always hanging open when Tanish and Clive are on. HOW in the heck do the counselors NOT address all the abuse she heaps upon this man. So much for their marriage counseling they proivde – when they fail to address the LARGE LOUD ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM (hope I didn’t break any commenting rules by saying that). Traci and Kevin I can to some degree get with their storyline. The rest of the folks are a JOKE, you hear me a JOKE.

  15. Cecee

    Hahaha! I love the Fred Sanford reference – ‘This is the big one!’ Tanisha, please- you are no redd foxx.

    • Cecee

      I just saw the other posts – I can’t believe she’s going to be on OITNB. Guess she’s practicing.

    • Marilyn

      LOL!! but what is up with the jersey shore girl’s face. Damn that’s scary. And what career is she blabbing about. I never watched Jersey Shore but does she have some talent that I’m unaware of? Oh and her boyfriend seems like such a jerk.

  16. O.O

    The Sanford and Son reference …… Priceless ! ( tears)

  17. Jon Gosselin made a couple of fake phone calls, pretending to talk to Kate.
    So lame.

  18. loo

    She also is on David Tutero’s show. I’m am guessing the will be a vow renewal.

    • The clip for Jenni’s David Tutera wedding (and Lawd yes, I will be covering that) show’s Jenni trying to say with a straight face that she wants “edible sushis on naked people and strippers riding on elephants.”​

      On Sun, Jul 20, 2014 at 11:47 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:


      • loo

        and she is serious

      • Are you keeping a straight face while writing this? I am sure David Tutera is having heartburn. I do have my shower gift for Jenni. A little tee shirt that says STRIPPER IN TRAINING in rhinestones.

      • Angel

        Can anyone tell me what channel is carrying this wedding, please? Possibly it is too far out to be on my tv program guide, it comes up empty when I enter David’s name. Thanks

      • ​It’s on the same channel as Marriage Boot Camp and I believe in the same time slot a week from Friday’s Finale. It’s called something like Celebrations?

        On Sun, Jul 20, 2014 at 2:29 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:


      • Cat

        Maybe she saw the lions on Kandi’s wedding, and decided to copycat, but with elephants?

  19. Angel

    That helps, TT. I made a note of it. TY

Please Read the COMMENTING RULES before commenting.