I had great plans for this recap. Really, I did. But I can only work with what Bravo gives me and I am bored to death. This reunion is just awful. Since I really have nothing to say, I’m going to rely mostly on T. Kyle gifs. I had thought about doing a pyramid in the style of Abby Lee Miller, but they really didn’t give me anything to critique. I will instead simply rank the ladies performances from worst to best.
You’re a bigot!
Carlton was barely even there. The Wiccan debate with Kyle was repetitive and awful. Bottom of the pyramid.
What means goad?
I thought that line was pretty funny. However, Yo seemed very uncomfortable sitting next to Joyce. It’s hard not being the prettiest girl on the couch it seems.
You are the one calling that paparazzi! I have a show, honey. Siberia!
Next on the pyramid is Joyce. Joyce is the prettiest girl on the couch, but her skill level on the reunion battle field is not up to par. If you are allowed to stay in the competition you need to work on your insults. I know you can do it!
My cheeks are my cheeks! You can feel them! I don’t want to have a face lift. I don’t want to end up like that girl that got fired last year! I’m not in the bathroom doing cocaine, I’m not in the car smoking pot, I like my wine!
Brandi is the opposite of Joyce in every way. Brandi, you need to work on your facial expressions. That angry sour look is annoying. You are either angry or crying. Your jab at Adrienne and the overall painful tedium of this episode are the only things that moved you up the list this far.
So nasty. I think they were afraid of Ken in his underpants.
The Queen Bee sort of checked out on this episode. But hearing her say “underpants” was priceless.
I missed a huge chunk of my fucking life and my children’s life, so I am sorry if I missed a party or two. When have you ever heard me say I like a turtle? I don’t trust you with my shoe! I wouldn’t trust you with an old pair of socks! So I would never have said that to you!
We can always count of Kim to say totally absurd things. She definitely came through for us tonight guaranteeing her high placement on the countdown!
You’re a liar and a hypocrite! Bonus points for not reacting to Carlton calling you a bigot. I know what a pentagram looks like because I’ve seen it on Richard Ramirez, the night stalker!
Kyle wins the night by a landslide when she compares Carlton to a serial killer and rapist! It takes years of reunion experience to come up with a line like that. You win for that kernel of corn in the pile of poo that was this show!