Dance Moms Recap: It’s a Maddie, Maddie, Maddie World

Abby Lee

First of all the Choreographer’s Cut stuff is ruining my ability to DVR actual new episodes, my Tuesday night does not have the room for two hours of Lifetime! Also, we are a full four minutes in to the recording and the show is just now starting after 3 different Next Week…Previously on..Coming Up on.. so I’m quite sure this will cut off before the winners are announced. There are supposed to be three minutes of commercial at the end of the show! This is so the DVR doesn’t get cut off before the end, and so everyone has a potty break before the next show starts. This is how we do it in America, Lifetime. Get with the program. /end rant

It’s time for the dreaded pyramid AKA squashing everyone’s self-esteem (except Maddie of course) right before learning a new routine. Let’s see who gets the brunt of Abby’s hormonal wrath this week… One the bottom was Mackenzie who didn’t go to the competition. I didn’t even notice that did I? Next up is Nia, her face was supposed to be envious, and it was something other than that.  Um, okay.

Next up is Peyton. WHO? What? When was the last time we saw Peyton. Now I wish I had not just deleted my four thousand copies of last weeks episode. I can’t recall the last time Peyton was there.  Mackenzie is last because she wasn’t there, but Peyton is above Nia who was there when Peyton hasn’t been there for WEEKS? IDGI. Am I just confused? I have a headache and maybe I am just not thinking clearly but this is the most bizarre thing in pyramid history to me.  Even more bizarre is Peyton bursting into tears and walking out because Abby called her a crybaby. She calls her that all the time because she cries a lot. Peyton is 16 years old. She should be used to it by now. Her mother goes after her and Peyton is pissed because none of the mothers stood up for her. She says if Abby talked to Maddie that way then the mothers would have defended her. Um, well, Maddie never cries and is pretty much perfect so Abby would never say that. Her mother says that she (Peyton) is the one who keeps wanting to come back to ALDC when she has tried to get her to go elsewhere. I am not buying this whole scene especially now that Abby is going after her rather than continuing with pyramid. Peyton sobs and tells Abby how much she loves dancing at her studio. And back into pyramid we all go.

Next up is Chloe, Abby says nice things. To Chloe. But of course then she tells her if she were home schooled like Maddie she would be improving a lot faster. /Heavy Sigh. Chloe smiles and nods. Next is Maddie. She was perfect in every way. Amazing. A shrine should be erected in her honor and her birthday should be a national holiday.  Kendall is on top of the pyramid. It’s a Christmas miracle! Kendall won the technique award and Abby liked that because Abby takes that to mean that she is doing something right. So, be thankful to Abby, Kendall that she taught you well. Aren’t you lucky. abbylee

The new fake competition is in Maryland. Finally Abby acknowledges that Peyton is back. She was brought back to take the lead in their version of Kinky Boots. Nia asks, “Isn’t Kinky Boots about drag queens?”  Well yes, yes it is and none of the moms seem to have a problem with their prepubescent girls portraying adult male cross dressers. Oh wait, Holly does. Holly can always be counted on as being the sane one.  The drag queen solo is called “Lift You Up.”

As for solos, they go to Maddie, Chloe and Mackenzie.  It seems the sisters are competing against each other. Is this just for overalls or has Makenzie moved into a new age bracket?  Mackenzie is doing one of Maddie’s old routines, Maddie is doing a tap number and Chloe has a contemporary piece.  Godspeed Chloe…

Chloe’s dance is called “Follow You” because Abby says she is always following Maddie. Then she tells Mackenzie if she ever wants to catch her sister, now is the time.  Because it’s clearly a Maddie, Maddie, Maddie  world and well all just live it in.

The mothers hate the group dance, not because of the sexual overtones, but because of the sloppy choreography. They don’t think there is anyway it can win.  Melissa agrees, but that is probably because, as Abby is telling the girls, this is the first time they have done a group dance where Maddie is not the lead.

Abby is even putting Mackenzie in the same outfit that Maddie wore when she did the same solo. Abby actually just said this to Mackenzie, who apparently just turned 9, “When Maddie dances she is like a breath of fresh air, when you dance it’s like the stuff we spray in the bathroom. There is a difference.” Abby does say in her talking head she wants Mackenzie to beat Maddie.  Meanwhile, Abby has not even completed Chloe’s choreography. The other mothers don’t believe that Maddie just got her solo the day before. Abby has said many times that she doesn’t do more tap with Maddie for competitions because tap takes longer to learn a new routine. She sure does look like she knows the dance very well. Yet, Chloe, still has not been given a complete choreography to practice.

Abby just did a talking head talking about how great Chloe is and how she is a shoo-in for the win. Perhaps it was shot after Chloe wins because it didn’t seem to fit with her previous comments. #fingerscrossed  There have also been several frankenbites this episode about how “this is a new competition.”

Adorable talking head by Mackenzie wearing a daisy headband where she says, “Being a drag queen is a lot of work, because you have to work it!”

Ah ha! I see now that the Peyton scene was definitely scripted. They needed a reason for the drag queens to come in. Now there is a scripted scene where the drag queens give Peyton a self-esteem boost and a make-over. Perhaps the other moms were not down with that.  Then another scripted scene between Maddie and Mackenzie. This is the most scripted I have ever seen this show.

At the competition, the little clips they show of the competition looked A LOT better than the usual ones. This does not bode well for the Abby Lee Drag Queen number.

Maddie’s tap solo was perfect. She gave great face.

Mackenzie’s solo was good. It was nowhere near Maddie’s level, BECAUSE SHE IS NINE YEARS OLD. And also because after Abby coaching her to do Maddie’s face, Mackenzie smiled the entire number. The number was called, “Cry.” They even had a side by side up on the screen of Maddie doing the dance in a previous season.  #scarredforlife

Chloe should win. End of discussion.

Abby says Mackenzie’s dance was good but she will never be Maddie. OMFG how many times is that in the script? No human would ever say this that many times.

Abby is already telling Peyton that if they lose it is her fault. They are all wearing wigs and the chances of one of them flipping their wig is very high. It seems the feeling of failure is already in the air. Once again, Abby wants Kalani back. It is not Peyton’s fault they are not doing a lyrical number with Kalani, for fucksake.

The group dance was the worst thing I have ever seen. I would be surprised if they make top ten. It was grossly sexually inappropriate, not just for the girls dancing but for all the little bible thumping girls in the audience. If you want to take you kid to a drag show, that’s fine for your kid. But if I were these people, if this is even a remotely real competition I would never have ALDC back. Peyton’s 16 year old ass checks literally hung out of her costume. MACKENZIE was doing the booty shake. It was all very Rocky Horror Picture Show. It was just inappropriate for this situation.  Y’all may resume calling me a prude now. I will be over here clutching my pearls.

Maddie wins first, MACKENZIE wins second and Chloe wins third. Because, there is no God.

And this religious philosophy is confirmed when ALDC wins first place overall. However it sounded like they said “in our fan category” whatever that means. Was there a vote from the audience or something?  So anyway, they won, and Peyton was fantastic in her role. You remember Peyton the poor girl who bore the entire responsibility for them winning?  Well they won and Abby said they were great and she could not take her eyes off Mackenzie.

This show is really starting to frustrate me. I have to watch it now from the perspective of How Will Abby Fuck Over The Other Girls This Week?  I bet Mackenzie is at the top of the damn pyramid next week.

Chloe was ROBBED.


Filed under Abby Lee Miller, Dance Moms

86 responses to “Dance Moms Recap: It’s a Maddie, Maddie, Maddie World

  1. I am in full agreement. Peytons cheeks hanging out was inappropriate, Makenzie humping the air was inappropriate, Abby’s idea of this entire routine was inappropriate. I am clutching my pearls as well and give a point to Kelly in the upcoming court case due to the inappropriate performance(s) at Abby’s direction. And yes, Chloe was robbed. Sigh.

  2. jelley

    Abby’s unhealthy obsession with Maddie makes me hate Maddie.

    I wish abby would be nice to the girls’ faces sometimes. She was nice in her talking head about chloe but only shits all over her to her face.

    MacKenzie is adorable. Love her. #teammackenzie

    Why was abby at the last minute saying to the girls that she should have saved the group dance for a more appropriate arena, like nyc? It’s not like they asked to do a drag queen dance. She just irritates me beyond belief. I hope the girls are making a lot of money to put up with abby.

    • I simply do not believe that the moms and the girls are not totally aware of everything that Abby says and does beforehand. NO parent (except Melissa) would allow their children to be treated the way Abby treats them and still PAY her to do it. I believe that they all have a “Character” to play and so do the moms. I don’t believe that Abby would have lasted this long in the business if she really treated her students this way. I am also wondering about the various competitions and how they allow some of the behavior that goes on not only with Abby’s group but between the Candy Apples and ALDC. I am not buying into this and I agree completely that this whole thing is scripted. It’s a shame that part of that script is taking a beautiful, innocent, talented child like Maddie and turning her into a hated character who in real life would be embarrassed to be made such an iconic figure to her friends who dance with her. She and her sister are home schooled so this is the only contact they have with other girls their age so why would she want to be put on such a pedestal and watch her friends be treated so horribly? Either Maddie is a victim or a participant in this horrible game of one upsmanship. I hope it’s the former and that she isn’t a little brat who feels entitled to the Abby effect. As for Kinky Boots…that doesn’t belong anywhere near children this age andI doubt that most of them understood what they were portraying. I love to watch the girls dance but the show is truning into a travesty of bad taste in so many ways.

      • Wait. Maddie is a hated character??? How do you know this is the only contact she has with friends? And why exactly is there anything inherently wrong with Drag Queens??? What makes you think they don’t understand cross dressing when they had two lovely ladies teaching them what it’s about???

  3. brillke

    I was so confused by Peyton’s return too. I went and looked up the episodes to see if I missed one but nope, I hadn’t.

    Those were some busted drag queens! I would have loved to seen Shangela come back but filming may have taken place while she was rehabbing a broken leg.

    I’m not a fan of musical theatre but I do love me some Kinky Boots. The movie is amazing and I’m just waiting for the show to come back to the Fox in STL.

    The dance was way too mature for these girls and all that booty shaking was too much.

    I loved Chloe’s performance this week. I thought it was the best she’s danced in ages. Maddie was good, Mackenzie was much better than expected but Chloe was amazing.

    Looks like Abby is short some costumes next week. Can’t wait to see who she blames it on.

    • I think it is INSANE (like you btw) THE FUCKING NUMBER OF TIMES SHE POINTS IT OUT.! It is like saying water is wet! I did not want her to get a participation trophy. I DIDN’T THINK SHE DESERVED SECOND PLACE YOU FUCKNUT!

      READ THE POST “Mackenzie’s solo was good. It was nowhere near Maddie’s level, BECAUSE SHE IS NINE YEARS OLD. And also because after Abby coaching her to do Maddie’s face, Mackenzie smiled the entire number. The number was called, “Cry.” They even had a side by side up on the screen of Maddie doing the dance in a previous season. #scarredforlife”

      And that’s the mother fucking news. Goodnight, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

      • But Maddie was 9 in the video they showed on the split screen. It’s not age. Maddie is a miracle. You don’t get two miracles. Especially from the womb of a dolt.

  4. I don’t think you watch the same show that i do. Mckenzie was and is no Maddie. Did you watch the two next to each other? Kids cute. But she lacks the graceful lines that her sister owns. Chloe was meh. Her mother is a pain in the ass and NEVER happy. The fact is that her daughter is just not the best. She’s great. But not the best. In fact, I think Kalani is even better.

    Abby said if the dance failed it would be Peyton’s fault. She must know something about Peyton and her will because she was excellent. Maybe because of Abby’s words. I thought the kinky boots thing was good. Nothing remotely inappropriate. It was good clean fun.

    I don’t think I read last week’s blog. I hope you talked about stuffed Broadway Baby. That was the funniest fucking scene EVER.

    • Well, clearly you are an idiot. I am typing from my email so I can’t see, but I thought I blogged that Mackenzie was good but now where near Maddie. Or Chloe for that matter. No way Mac danced better than Chloe.

      You idea of “good clean fun” for a nine year old is mortifying. Don’t make me twist these here pearls I am clutching.

      On Wed, Mar 19, 2014 at 7:08 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:


      • Tamara you ignorant slut, you questioned Abby repeating that Maddie is better. I was simply pointing out that she is right. I’m so sick of people expecting parcipitation praise. The only thing that makes those girls want to get better is to be as good as Maddie. Coddling them and saying they are good enough makes for underachievers. THAT IS THE PROBLEM WITH THIS COUNTRY. You can feel sorry for my kid. He does not get participation praise. And when he gets an A he is pressured to explain why it’s not an A+. He pulls a lot of A+ grades. He would not if I let him think that anything less was acceptable.

      • Are you sure that Teecee66 isn’t Abby? What a nasty peice of work. “Ignorant slut”? Don’t read here if you hate the blogger so much. Wow…you have a lot of nerve. Start your own blog.

  5. jelley

    I loved the group dance. It was so well done and fun, and all the girls were into it.

  6. I agree Chloe was robbed. She did a great job! TT have you watched Bring It, yet? Great recap. as usual!

  7. ms thang

    I don’t understand why Holly allows Nia to participate. I really don’t get that

      • Gigglypoof

        I am in complete agreement with you teecee. I LOVED the dance. It was very fun and entertaining to watch.

      • Just Me

        I dont think she treats Nia fairly. She is mean to all the girls except maddie but nia doesnt even get a chance unless she is pissed at someone else

      • BECAUSE Nia’s talent is very limited. Watch her. She’s spazzy. She’s lucky to be there. And lucky to have these teachers. And REALLY lucky to be on tv.

      • suerobb

        She is under contract

    • Judy Reinhardt

      Holly was the first of the mothers to take her child out of school and homeschool. As with all reality shows, there is much we don’t see. What I do see at the competitions is how all of the girls run to Abby to celebrate. Chloe is usually the first dancer there. As the mother of a competitive gymnast, I want to say again that you have to get the girls past 13/14 to see if they are going to stick. My daughter did NOT. Now, what age are Kelly’s girls? Just saying. BTW, I really liked Kelly and Abby says repeatedly that there are roles on Broadway that will be ripe for Mia, who I love, to get. I just plain like the show.

  8. melicupcakezz

    Hi Tamara!! I totally agree with you about the outfits. I know nowadays girls like to dress a lot more revealing then when I was younger but to me it takes their innocence away. No one should have their butt cheeks hanging out, especially a child. The world is full or sick pedophiles and to showcase these girls in really skimpy outfits is wrong. And some of the dance moves can be sexual. And I really am getting sick of this Maddie on a pedestal. I’m sorry to say but I cannot stand her. I hate little miss perfects. I totally get pushing a child to better them and make them try harder. I totally get not praising your child for little things. But, I think no adult should ever compare one child to another. Ok Maddie is good, but not the best. Kalani is waaay better than Maddie and way prettier (sorry but I’m sick of the Maddie pain face). Abby didn’t even teach Kalani and knows shes better and that’s why Abby would never have them compete against each other. And Abby thinks shes making Mackenzie better by telling her to be like Maddie. Mackenzie is her own person. What Abby is doing is making everyone resent Maddie. All Abby does is take her misery out on the non favorites. I wish she would get a man and get laid so she be in a better mood.

    • You are a complete and utter idiot.

      • melicupcakezz

        Wow. Soo much hate. Do u need a hug? Are u not loved. I feel sorry for u.

      • I’ll paypal you five dollars to hug her! Go ahead. Do it! Do It!!

      • Yes. If you’d enjoy pulling back a bloody stump, that’s a good idea.

      • I get it…Teecee is a drag queen and she is insulting real woman because she can’t be one. So sorry….maybe in your next life. I don’t enjoy your comments on here and for those of us trying to read a blog and talk about a particular show…you are an irritant. I suspect that you are an irritant in every aspect of your sad life. I now sit and wait breathlessly for your nasty reply which I’m sure you think will be brilliant. Truth…you are a piece of scum who makes Abby Lee Miller look like a saint.

      • melicupcakezz

        hahahahahahahahhahaha. thank you!!

      • Curious. Why would calling me a drag queen be an insult? I think it would be a very fun thing to be.

    • But seriously? Railing on and in about hating a child and then ending with “Abby needs a man”?? You must need a fucking FLEET.

      And generally anyone who does not know the difference between then and than is an utter idiot. Sorry. Thems the rules.

      • melicupcakezz

        Railing on and in? and u corrected my than and then. Thems? I’m so sorry I made a mistake. I really do feel sorry for your kid now. I’m posting my opinion. I made a joke about Abby. big deal. Everyone who deals with a bitch says maybe she needs to get laid. Maybe u didn’t think I was funny, but i did. And I need a fleet? I think my husband might disagree. I may say i hate Maddie and its because of the way she is portrayed on the show. So run your mouth to Lifetime and not me. Seriously u have some anger issues.

      • Mine was a typo. Yours is a moron who doesn’t know the difference. And if you’ve never heard “thems the rules” you might want to take your head out of your ass and look around the real world.

        It’s so funny that someone who thinks it’s fine spewing hate towards two reality tv characters gets all flipped about and yelling a pit anger issues when they get a little tiny taste of their own medicine.

      • melicupcakezz

        reality shows are on tv and for that I can judge them. If they don’t want to be judged then don’t be on tv. At least when i make remarks im sarcastic and funny. You have nothing but pure hate in you. I will pray for you tonight.

      • And you are here posting. And for that I can judge YOU. I will pray for you tonight. For your death.

      • melicupcakezz

        blah blah blah blah. I truly feel sorry for you. I’d wager that you’re some unhappy ugly ass person who is miserable. At first I liked this blog, but now I see the kind of people who blog on it. I’m going back to reality tea. People are a lot nicer on there.

      • Ps: you are completely unfunny. I’d wager that you’ve never been funny in your life and you would not know funny if it bit your gynormous ass.

      • See. Not funny. Not remotely funny.

      • Nice of you to announce yourself. But…why not keep posting under the cuppy cakey nic? Why create another nic to agree with yourself?

      • melicupcakezz

        cause thats not me. i always post under melicupcakezz. thats someone else. and u called me a moron. lmao instead of arguing with people here go back to your dating site.

      • Again, I’m confused. Why would it be bad for me to use a dating site? Can you explain that to me?

    • Judy Reinhardt

      cupcakezzs, we NEED teecee. She brightens many a post and always has. But go ahead and disagree with her in a disagreeable manner and she will eat you for lunch with us as an audience.

  9. I do not need to be informed on the details of this argument in order to form an opinion and my opinion is: Abby, Tamara and TeeCee are cra…passionate.

  10. Sorry, Merilyn and cupcake just rubbed me the wrong way. Just chalk it up to the fact that clearly, I am an idiot.

  11. tobaccorhoda

    Bringing the hate since 2001 would be a great inscription on a tombstone.

  12. “At first I liked this blog, but now I see the kind of people who blog on it. I’m going back to reality tea. People are a lot nicer on there.” Huh.

    • Gracie

      Teecee if you dislike tt’s blog and all of its readers then why are you here? Are you just trolling to start shit? Quit being an ipignorant fuck tard and go kick rocks!! Nobody gives two shits what your opinion is anyways, this is not

      • Um…aren’t you just the bully.

        Exactly what gave you the impression that I dislike Tamara’s blog??

        I don’t dislike all the commenters. Just the stupid ones.

        “Nobody gives two shits…” Really? You speak for everyone here? You’ve checked with them all and can confirm this fact? Make sure to check with the boss lady.

  13. jelley

    Can everyone focus their hate on abby instead of each other please?

    K thx

    • JoJo

      I doubt Abby would mind. Her controversial personality is TV worthy and no hate, no love, no comments = no ratings. I’d call that an invitation. Hate among commenters here does nothing for ratings (as far as I know 😉

    • I’m sorry. I forgot this was YOUR blog and you got a got in what the topic of focus is.

  14. Kaleesi

    I absolutely love teecee66, look forward to her/his comments, (didn’t know she was a drag queen- like her even more now), and miss her….him….when he’s …um she’s …. not here.
    And I love the banter between teecee & Tamara.
    Apparently, some just don’t get it.

  15. charmaine

    First – I do believe that mackenzie is NOT better than maddie, they were both 9 when they did that solo and I agree with the poster that said that she lacks the natural graceful lines that maddie has. That said, I do NOT condone the fact that abby went all out of her way to shove it into everyone’s faces that mackenzie “cannot compare” to maddie, it was spiteful and entirely unnecessary.
    Second – chloe is good, but she has been lacking the grace I saw in her in the first two seasons for quite awhile now. I am not entirely sure that she has been improving as fast as maddie has as well this season. Maddie’s turns have improved and they are a lot more stable than they were last season. Chloe.. well, she’s still using the same tricks and combination of moves and turns she was doing last season. I think all this drama on the set of Dance Moms is robbing all the girls of a chance to really get down and practice and put the hard work where they need to.
    Third – the 1st-3rd placements was for OVERALL scores. I am pretty sure chloe is 1 year older than maddie, which means that maddie and mackenzie would have been in the same division (9-11) and chloe, being 12, would have been in the next division up. Chances are that with chloe’s score as the 3rd highest overall, she would have had won a top 3 placement in her own category as well, which was obviously not shown because hey then reality tv wouldn’t be as fun.
    Fourth – agree with all that Kalani is clearly the best dancer and trumps all dances at ALDC right now. But then again, tons of people are forgetting that she is TWO years older than maddie and ONE year older than chloe. That’s a lot of time for someone to have to improve. Of course, that’s assuming they even still have the time to take classes and improve, what with all the Dance Moms drama happening.

  16. suerobb

    Abby is an abuser. This is not how you treat little kids. They know what they are up against in competition. They support each other, but Abby is always sticking a knife in it. You have to remember, these mother and daughter’s are under contract. You do not compare one child against another especially sisters.
    I did think Chloe did a great routine. Maddie was clearly give her routine way in advance, and Mackenzie had Maddie old tapes to look at. Chloe barely got a finished piece. Abby does not give equal time or effort with each solo but I think she doesn’t want the same results since she would like to get rid of most of the team. All things considered, I think Chloe deserved to win

  17. Janet697

    tamaratattles just found your site by accident while looking for Abby’s newest insult about Chloes looks due to a health reason posted on trash talk today. I love your take on the pathetic excuse for a show and will tell you now I am postive teecee66 is just one of the maddie/melissa trolls who have nothing intelligent to say about anybody or anything because the are brainless dolts.

    • LOL Welcome Janet. TeeCee is a regular here. I can assure you that she is not a Maddie/Melissa troll. That said, you will likely not care for her. :)

      • Janet697

        @Tamara, thank you for the information. I have not had a chance to read all the comments because I can not see properly due to a long lasting eye infection. So sorry if I put my foot in it but I do not take crap from anybody and dislike the idiots who seem to think we should all kiss their butts.

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