We begin tonight’s winter finale episode right where we left off, with Sally on the phone to Cyrus letting him know that her husband, Daniel Douglas is deader than doornails. If you missed last week’s episode, it was the best show of all seasons.
YOU WAIT UNTIL I AM AT THE FINISH LINE! YOU WAIT UNTIL I AM ON THE DOORSTEP OF HISTORY AND YOU BETRAY ME! (pause for commentary) ALL and I do mean ALL of this cast was ROBBED by the Golden Globes. Kerry Washington is great, but MY GOD what do they want for Kate Burton do, OPEN A VEIN? She is spectacular and I keep rewinding this scene. Did they not submit it? I love Kerry but there are SO MANY PEOPLE on this show that deserve a Golden Globe as well. Except for Best Actor in a TV Drama, despite HUGE competition from, many of the Scandal men, James Spader is everythang. You can see my creepy ode to him in comments here.
Sorry back to the show… YOU HAVE RELEASED A SNAKE INTO OUR GARDEN. um, heh. I am not fond of the Shonda Rhimes fast paced jumpy editing here. Daniel says she knew he was gay when she married him! She says, ” You think you got me here? Oh sweetheart, you are the burden on my back as I make my way to salvation. You are my cross to bear, You are my original sin, You are pretty and stupid and you can’t make a living to save your life. All you have given me is our daughter who can’t keep her knees together….” “I CANNOT WAIT UNTIL YOU MEET YOUR MAKER I CANNOT WAIT UNTIL YOU ARE JUDGED FOR YOUR LIES!” Daniel says he is off to fuck hot young guys and she literally stabs him in the back with a letter opener.
And she calls Cyrus? Holy shit her face is splattered with blood. Cyrus shows up and she says the devil made her do it and says, um, what now? Cyrus is of course the cause of all this, or so he thinks, so the guilt is overwhelming. Dear God this is the best show on TV. Cyrus is a stress puker like me. So what will he do? WHAT WILL HE DO?
Meanwhile, Olivia is dealing with the fact her mother is an international terrorist. Because Shonda Rhimes refuses to just let us digest one thing at damn time. Huck put a tracking device on Quinn to keep her from fucking up. THANK THE BABY JESUS. Quinn doesn’t kill Eli because they have a tracking device on Mamma Pope somehow and they know where she is now so Eli retracts the tape and the deal is off. Quinn did not have time to kill him.
So Quinn extracts her detection device from her own mouth by somehow using a rod from the towel dispenser (work with me here) and flushes it down the toilet. WHY? God only knows. I am so confused. Is going rogue again?
It looks to me like Fitz is riding in on the white horse to take care of his woman /swoon. And that includes bringing in the head of B613. He is negotiating with him now… PERFECT.
Um “That’s a matter of National Security and it is above your pay grade Mr. President.” OH NO YOU DI’NT. Power struggle ensues. And why are we calling Eli, Rowan now. He’s Eli to me. Fitz asks all the questions we want to know, Why have me shoot down that plane if you already had her in custody? “That’s above your pay grade, Mr. President.” Fitz says, “Here is the thing about power Mr. Rowan, it is always hard to accept when you have lost it.” Eli responds “or to realize you have never had it at all.” BUUUUURN point Eli. Eli continues with the whole “that is above your pay grade Mr, President.” OUCH.
Cyrus cleans up the dead gay guy in the closet who was married to the VP mess. You should watch it was too beautiful to recap.
Now Abbey is going back to her boyfriend to say, um hey, you know that huge big favor I go for a really good blow job? Yeah, about that, I may have been wrong. Could you maybe put her back on the list? Good God we are only ten minutes in. And she gets him to send her the goods on Olivia’s mother.
BUT, Jake is trying to explain to Olivia that just because her mother is an INTERNATIONAL TERRORIST doesn’t mean her father is a good guy. /head spins.
Wow, Jake should have been nominated too, I am telling you the Golden Globes nominees should all have been from SCANDAL !
Sally is nonfunctional at the moment and Cyrus is trying to get her together before the doctor comes in to officially call a time of death. They have dressed him in pajamas but the doctor wants to further examine the body. At the last second, Sally comes out of her stupor and flings herself on him while demanding no one touch him. This gives Cyrus the opportunity to get rid of the doctor and ask for limited intervention in the future. That was a close call
I love that Cyrus and Mellie are so close. Mellie comes in after hearing most of the facts and blurts them all out to Cyrus who says, “Are your drinking, Cyrus, at seven in the morning?” Cyrus is guilt ridden. He keeps telling Mellie the devil came in ( and that is why she killed him) he says WE ARE THE DEVIL , WE CAME IN! Cyrus is starting to have a hard time being the bad guy because he pimped out his own husband and now this. Hell hath no fury like a woman whose husband is screwing another man. But Mellie who has been on the receiving end of all that men do…she’s used to it. She will have to handle it herself. Of course, Mellie gets him together.
Mellie calls Fitz and says she will handle his obligations regarding the dead guy and Fitz goes back to his pissing match with Eli. Why doesn’t Eli just tell him that Mamma Pope is a bad, bad lady? Instead they argue about who is a man and who isn’t. Fitz wants Eli to know the he is screwing his daughter. Eli says Fitz is a little rich boy. Eli says he has worked for everything he has. He is the first in his family to graduate from college, his daughter went to boarding school with the children of kings, he made that happen. Eli says that Fitz has had everything handed to him on a platter and he squandered it all. Now he wants the daughter that he made. Eli says Fitz can talk to him about what a great lay is daughter is to try to get a response from him all he wants, but guess what? Eli continues to point out that he is above his paygrade and he is well aware that Fitz thinks he is in love with his daughter. Fitz says he does love her. Eli says that he loves that she is his door marked exit. He loves that she is his way out. If he is in love with Olivia he no longer has to fulfill his father’s dream, he will no longer be his father’s son. And apple never falls too far from the tree. Don’t use the person that I made to make you into a man. You’re a boy. That was another brilliant performance by Joe Morton as Eli/Rowan Pope.
Meanwhile Olivia is back at the gladiators offices. Abbey got the FBI file on her mother from her lover, David Rosen. It’s good to know people in the Biblical sense it seems. Her mother was born in East London, her parents were linked to the Marxist liberation front. When she was 16 she fell off the grid until she turned up in Paris at age 19 under the alias, Margaux Bouvier, in Germany she was Hannah Stuart, in Tunisia she was Ines Bassir, in Somalia she was Safi Ali Farah… the list goes on until she came to the US in 1972 where she was Maya Lewis, soon to be Maya Pope but her contacts still knew her as Marie Wallace. She was stealing government secrets from Eli and providing them to enemies of the US. Abbey says she didn’t kill anyone. Abbey says she has been locked up for 22 years. Maybe she has served her time. She is giving Olivia the opportunity to let her mother go.
Cyrus goes to tell James that Daniel Douglas is dead but when he walks in James is already watching the news on TV. Because as a big time Washington DC reporter, he apparently gets his news sitting at home watching the idiot box. #plothole? Cyrus starts trying to explain and James says he is done with the lies. Cyrus then asks, “What upsets you more, James, that your husband may be a murderer or that your closeted fling will never bend you over a desk again?” James tells Cyrus he is sick. Cyrus says that he did not kill Daniel, it was a coincidence but that he is deeply, deeply sorry for his loss. I cannot have these two breaking up because their scenes together are too good.
Sally is wearing a solemn black suit and reliving Daniel’s death in her head when Leo Bergen her campaign manager arrives. He says they can push back their candidacy announcement however long she needs. Mellie walks in with flowers and condolences from Fitz and her. She manages to politely run Leo from the room. Mellie tells Sally they have made all the arrangements. Sallie is surprised Cyrus told her. Mellie suggests she not entertain guests for awhile, especially someone like Leo Bergen. Mellie tells Sally that she is so glad she is home now with family working together with the president for the good of our nation. In other words, Mellie has Sally by the balls and she will not be running for office and she will do as she is told.
Quinn and Charlie are holed up somewhere. Quinn says she needs to go home, get some stuff. Charlie says she can’t do that with Huck on her tail. Quinn misses her normal life. Charlie tells her she has too many skills that make her spectacular to be normal. He tells her if she wants to leave, she can, but he tells on her to sleep on it, she looks tired. She agrees and the curl up together on the bed. Am I the only one who doesn’t know where Quinn’s head is at?
James goes to David Rosen and spills his guts about sleeping with Daniel Douglas. He says either Cyrus got jealous or Langston got jealous because the next thing I know, he is dead of a heart attack. Rosen is not interested in doing anything with James ever again and he is summarily dismissed.
Olivia and Harrison and Abbey are trying to figure out why Eli blew of the plane and killed 300 people rather than confiscating the files? Olivia says maybe he thought it was more than just files.
Huck and Jake are searching for Eli. Jake calls and tells Liv his father is in the Pentagon. Olivia calls Fitz. She is begging him to let her talk to her father. We cut to a new scene and Olivia is sitting across from her father. Dad is saying nothing yet Olivia is figuring it all out. Her father shot down the plane to keep a bomb from detonating over London, which would have killed thousands. But it was all a lie. She lied to him and got him to kill hundreds of innocent people for nothing. Olivia says she fooled him like she fooled me. DIDN’T SHE? Eli nods his head ever so slightly. Maybe. It was a nearly imperceptible movement. Olivia gets up and tells Fitz to have her arrested the second she gets off that plane. YOU.GET.HER. She storms out of the interrogation room. Neither man ever said a word except for Eli telling Fitz he should not have brought her there.
Eli is unchained. He tells Fitz that B613 is not an individual. Cut off the head of the snake and another will grow in its place. Remember that, Mr. President. Then he asks for his coat and tie back.
Charlie rolls over in bed and discovers Quinn missing. In the next scene she is walking into the gladiators headquarters fully groomed and dressed and ready to work. She walks in without a word and goes straight for Huck’s office and closes the door. She says, “I’m back.” Huck says nothing. Quinn asks him if he has anything to say to her. He says if she wants him to say he’s sorry, he’s not sorry, if it was not for Olivia he would have pulled out all her teeth. He would have pulled off all her skin. If it wasn’t for Olivia he would kill her right now. Huck says, Liv saves us and you betrayed her? You’re not a gladiator anymore. Quinn backs away slowly and leaves.
Cyrus is crying and trying to put his pants on and James walks in. Cyrus asks what happens now, through his tears. Cyrus says, ” So you want to fight? Because I don’t want to fight. Do you want to yell at me go ahead, I’ll listen. You want to call the police? You don’t have any evidence. Do you want to take Ella and leave me? You don’t have a job or any income. (oh so that is why he was home watching the news on TV. I missed that he was not working. Did he get fired or quit to be a stay at home dad?) Or the ability to outrun my legal connections that will fight to get me sole custody of that sweet little girl in the next room that I bought for you. Do you not want to love me anymore? Because I still love you. You’re still the love of my life and I am still the same man you married. And you maybe just never noticed the 666 on my forehead before. But now you see it. I’m hoping you’ll love me anyway. I’m hoping for better or worse means something to you. But maybe it doesn’t. Maybe love isn’t enough. So I am standing here asking you, afraid, and in underwear, and without my soul, What happens now?” Cyrus says he will give him some time to think about it. He goes in his room and closes the door. James has said nothing. He lets out a deep breathe while staring at the ceiling.
Fitz calls Olivia. She asked if they arrested her mother. He says the plane never made it to Hong Kong, they found it in Mongolia. There are images of all the crew with gunshot wounds to the head. She has disappeared. Jake says he has connection in that part of the world. Olivia dismisses the thought. She’s gone. Olivia is worried about retaliation from her father towards all her men. Jake says he would not underestimate the President. Which is an odd thing for him to say. Then they kiss. Jake says he came to say good bye. Jake says, “I loved you. Whatever happens next, I wanted to make sure that you knew that I loved you. I love you.” And he too has disappeared.
Quinn went back to Charlie.
Leo is trying to convince Sally to run. He says that Mellie, and Cyrus and Fitz are being supportive because they are terrified she will run against him. Sally says she is not going to run. Leo says that Daniel is up in heaven right now telling everyone who will listen that his wife is going to be the first female president. Sally screams, “HE IS IN HELL! Daniel Douglas is in hell because he is a Sodomite. He was a godless sinner and he deserved what he got.” And so now Leo knows. Way too many people know about Sally killing Daniel. Leo is furious that she called the White House. Leo says he is her first call! If you kill someone, call HIM.
Some little junior NSA employee walks into David Rosen’s office with a tape recording of the Vice President’s phone call to Cyrus. Well ain’t this a fine kettle of fish. The funeral is about to begin. They are going to have to race to get to the body.
Cut to Olivia calling her father. She says she keeps going over it and “you hid mom away for 22 years. You lied for 22 years. Was it all just to just to save your reputation? your job? or was it you trying to protect me from who she was?” Flashback scene to her childhood. When he had to tell her that her mother died. Eli says, “Tomorrow is Sunday. Come by at 7 I will have a pot roast ready. We can talk about the things we used to talk about, my job at the Smithsonian, the movies we’ve seen, because the answers you are so desperate for? You are never going to get them. Not from me.”
Eli walks into his office to find Jake sitting at his old desk. Jake says he is Command now. He says B613 is not a person, if you cut the head off the snake, another grows in its place. So Eli knows Fitz is in on this. He says that if Eli would like a job he can take an aptitude test, if not, he is going to have to ask his agents to escort him to the street. Eli leaves. Jake calls Fitz and tells him it is done. Fitz says they are going to make a great team.
James and Cyrus are in bed lying on their backs on the most.. um… gay sheets I have ever seen. James says, “Press Secretary.” Cyrus says, “What?” James says, “That’s what happens now. You name me White House Press Secretary and I won’t leave you.” Cyrus asks if he will still love him. James says don’t push it. And the deal is done. That should be interesting.
Olivia gets a call from her mother. Olivia asks where she says and she says she will see her real soon. She then tosses her burner phone into the trash can…. located directly in front of the White House.
And now for the bad news… Despite the fact that the Olympics will be on NBC, Scandal will not be returning until after the Olympics have ended. The spilt season does not return until Thursday February 27th.