American Horror Story: Coven Episode 5 Recap “Burn,Witch. Burn!”


By: Urethra Franklin

It’s 1833, and Madame Delphine LaLaurie is hosting a fancy schmancy Hallow Eve’s party with waltzing, masks, and a special Halloween edition of her Chamber of Horrors. The governor’s son, Jacques, is introduced as a potential suitor to her daughter Borja.  Her nickname is Borquita (Little Borja).  Madame LaLaurie wants to test him out with her serial killer style to see if he’s a cool & fun future son-in-law. Plus she wants to haze him for thrills & giggles because her bloomers get moist with excitement when she watches a handsome man piss in his pants with fear, “It makes me feel young again.” She escorts Jacques, with her daughters in tow, into her candle lit dining room to play the 19th century’s most popular Halloween game, GUESS MY TREATS, with her silver bowls filled with mystery goodies by sticking his hand inside them. He thinks bowl #1 has grapes. Wrong. It’s a bowl of eyeballs, and we see a flashback of how she gouged them out from her prisoner slaves with her own bare hands.  When she presents bowl #2 this psycho-sick bitch flirtatiously says “They’re long… and wet…and very slippery.” He nervously guesses sausages. Wrong again. It’s a bowl of intestines that seem to still be moving as we get a flashback of her gutting a prisoner slave.

Jacques flees the room, and she emasculates him, “You’re not man enough for my Borquita, much less my Chamber of Horrors.”  ….Her three daughters are whining in their bedroom that they can’t have boys over because their mom is Hannibal Lecter CRAZY, so they toss around the idea of killing her. Apples, meet the tree. She overhears them, and later when they’re asleep, she orders Bastien (pre-minotaur days) to forcibly drag them to her main Chamber of Horrors up in the attic to join her gallery of tortured & maimed prisoners. They are terrified, crying, & screaming as they are chained. Borquita is forced into a cramped cage, and Delphine doesn’t care if her leg has to be broken to get her inside.  The youngest daughter tells her it was a joke. We would never kill a cool mom like you.   Delphine growls “It’s because of my love for your plain faces, that you can still draw breath.” Then she tells them that she will set them free, in ONE YEAR, on the next Hallows Eve. But Borquita gets an extra treat for being the ringleader of the kill mommy brigade, “On Christmas morning, I’m gonna stuff your conniving mouth FULL OF SHIT.” #BitchDontPlaymaxresdefault
Cordelia is wailing & screaming after her acid attack. While Fiona is screaming for an ambulance she sees a dark cloaked figure walk outside…..Fiona is pill popping, and she is both high & stoned in the hospital waiting room, and is in total despair.  The doctor tells her that Cordelia was burned with sulfuric acid, and it burned through her optic nerves, and she will be blind. In a fit of motherly rage, Fiona starts screaming & hitting the doctor. #TermsOfEndearment… She is pulled away and retreats in shock & in tears back to her seat…. Just give Jessica her acting awards NOW.  All of them, including BEST MESSY HAIR.

Back at the Academy it seems that meek Zoe is now confidant & in charge as Delphine, Nan, & Queenie try to fortify the house against the zombie army.  Holy hunk Luke thinks it’s just a group of Halloween pranksters and goes outside to shoo them away…. Then we see Marie Laveau in her voodoo lair. She is horizontal  and in a deep trance, and she is LEVITATING at least 10 feet off the floor over chalked symbols & dead chickens…. Luke is outside telling the pranksters/zombies to get lost. They are eerily still and non-aggressive. Two teen boys walk by and think the Zombies are a cool Halloween display…… Marie is floating in the air, and her eyeballs are all white and spooky, and she commands “BEGIN”….. The zombie army has just been ACTIVATED, and they come to life, sort of. Luke is wide-eyed in disbelief as the zombies KILL the two teen boys. Luke starts to run away as he is attacked & injured as Nan is watching through the window. Zoe tells everyone to go to Spalding’s room in the attic and barricade themselves. Spalding comically shakes his hands, which is sign language for “NOOO you can’t crash my necrophilia tea party”.… Zoe follows Nan outside who is trying to help Luke while the others go upstairs to hide. Nan & Luke take shelter inside a car while surrounded by the zombies.

Cordelia is in her hospital room. Fiona is sitting on the edge of her bed and wants to pop more pills, but the amber bottle is empty. Fiona walks around the hospital, and it is creepy with the fish eye lens cinematography & flickering hospital lights as a slight homage to last season’s ASYLUM.  She finds the medication storage room. Instead of a swipe card she uses her fingernails to magically gain entry into the Pill-Mart. #Jackpot…. She steals the good stuff and washes some down with her flask of booze and starts walking around in a stoned dreamlike stupor. Fiona sees a dark cloaked figure roaming the halls. Either real or hallucinating, she bumps into an old man patient wearing only a diaper, and he tells her “You didn’t throw that acid, but you might as well have.” Is this a figment of her guilty conscious for being a bad mother? She staggers into a sobbing patient’s room and her stillborn baby is next to her bed. The dazed & medicated mother doesn’t want to see or hold the dead baby, but asks if it is a boy or a girl. Fiona tells her it’s a girl as she picks up the baby to give to the mother who is refusing to hold it. She tenderly encourages the woman to cradle the baby and to talk to her.  Fiona is feeding the woman the most loving words to say to the dead baby, sort of a spell by proxy, and then Fiona sweetly touches the baby, and magically the dead baby’s blue skin tone starts to change back to a healthy color and starts breathing again. It seemed like a selfless act of kindness by Fiona to let the new mother think her spoken loving words brought life back to her baby. The irony should not be lost because Fiona is grieving for her adult daughter while she helps a new mother with a second chance with her newborn child.


Delphine opens the door to allow Borquita-zombie inside, and she is looking like the little girl in the #Exorcist but worse. A tearful Delphine says “Come back to me child. You do know me?”  Well the answer is hell yeah as Borquita-zombie growls and strangles Delphine. Borquita also knocks out Spalding with a candlestick as she breaks through Queenie’s bedroom door. Queenie uses her voodoo doll power which is ineffective because Borquita-zombie only bleeds dust.  Queenie is cornered, and immortal Delphine to the rescue as she stabs Borquita in the back through her heart with an iron fire poker and kills her. Delphine stares at her twice dead daughter, “She had a monster for a mother. This last act was the only kindness I ever did for her” and she sobs into Queenie’s bosom…..


Zoe is outside and is chased into the greenhouse, where she finds a chainsaw. This gives Nan & Luke the opportunity to get out of the car. He is bleeding badly with a huge gash in his back, and they are trying to get back inside the school house.  As the zombies surround them again we hear the chainsaw revving.  With a nod to #TexasChainsawMassacre & #TheEvilDead Zoe starts buzzing off heads and limbs of the zombies with decaying flesh & blood splattering all over her.  How come the zombies bleed? Borquita bled dust when Queenie tried to kill her…. I don’t watch zombie movies. I’m a vampire enthusiast because they are sexy & REAL. #Delusional ….. The chainsaw runs out of fuel, and the last zombie alive/dead is hovering over Zoe on the ground. Almost naturally & subconsciously she uses the incantation “BE IN YOUR NATURE” with her palm facing the zombie. This simultaneously stops the zombie and jolts Marie out of her mid-air trance, and she slams with a thud to the floor.  Marie is catching her breath, “I don’t know what that was, but they got some REAL power in that witch house now”.  Zoe has no idea how or what she just did….Now where was neighbor Joan?  I thought she had Luke tethered to her bible. How did she NOT notice the zombie orgy massacre that is next door to her? #PlotHoles

Fiona is back at Cordelia’s bed-side. Hank finally shows up to his wife after a four hour drive from fuck-killing his online trick. Fiona & Hank tear into each other, which happens when family is in an emergency hospital crisis. Fiona predicts that he won’t win husband of the year when he abandon’s Cordelia for being blind, which he finds out about for the first time. He screams at Fiona that she’s a piece of shit, and reminds her that Cordelia hates her and that she needs to fuck off.  Does he NOT know that he is messing with the wrong witch? #SUPREME… A nurse rushes in and orders one of them to leave. Fiona gives him 15 minutes of alone time, and then he needs to fuck off on his own or HER WAY. She is itching to give him some of that witch-bitch treatment. He professes his unwavering love & devotion to Cordelia and reaches to hold her hand. INSTANTLY his blind witch-wife with her marble-dead eyes screams while being zapped like electricity with the images of her husband rough fucking and killing Kaylee. Was Cordelia psychic all along? Or is this a new power that manifested to compensate for her loss of eye sight? The irony is back at the bar Fiona told Cordelia that she doesn’t understand how she can’t see that Hank reeks of bullshit. Well now that Cordelia is blind she can see the truth.

It’s the next morning in the backyard of the Academy. Fiona is supervising Nan & Zoe as they wheel barrow in and burn the zombie carnage using cedar chips to mask the smell of burning flesh. Apparently the little vixen Nan has an injured Luke sleeping in her bed overnight. Where in the hellfire hell is his controlling holy-roller mother???? Fiona insists that Luke should stay with them until he recovers. A gleeful Nan says “Thank you” as she runs off to tend to him. Fiona tells Zoe that she likes a witch that knows how to fight, and thanked her for her great service to the Coven battling the zombies… Delphine comes outside to join Fiona at the zombie bonfire, and she laments “Those are my daughters. The day they were born, I sent such hopes and dreams to heaven. This is how it ends. In flames & decay.  They deserved a better mother than I could ever hope to be”.  Fiona empathizes “I know the feeling”. Delphine expects that this shared tragedy would make them besties forever. For an immortal that is a long ass time, and the immortal wannabe Fiona coldly replies “I doubt it. You are after all the maid”.

AHS-Coven-04-08The Witch Council revisits the Academy with Myrtle in her trademark pop of RED. They are formally accusing Fiona of gross neglect and blame her for the Coven’s recent troubles with outside forces of zombies, Minotaur, Madison’s disappearance, & Cordelia’s attack. They demand she step down as Supreme until the new one is determined while the Council is in control for the interim. Fiona rips into the Council, especially Myrtle. Fiona blames Myrtle for all the drama because she did not inherit the Supremacy 40 years ago, and this is her way to get control, even temporarily, because she hates Fiona. Fiona continues to defend herself by arguing that Coven’s recent troubles are an inside job. A defiant Myrtle rises up from her seat only to be forced back down by Fiona, “YOU WILL SIT”.  Either Fiona did this with kinesis or with the sheer force of her FURIOUS presence. It was chilling. I peed a little. Give Jessica the award for BEST FURIOUS scene too.

Fiona systematically begins to indict Myrtle. She says the Coven’s enemy is from the inside and hides in plain sight. According to Fiona she saw Myrtle’s face under the hooded cloak at hospital in the elevator mirror.  Fiona accuses Myrtle of trying to destroy Fiona by destroying Cordelia, and she DENIES it. She tells Fiona that she is more like a mother to Cordelia than she ever was. Fiona acknowledges she passed Cordelia into Myrtle’s care, but Myrtle latched on to Cordelia since she does not have her own child. Fiona takes it one step further and shifts the suspicion of the alleged murder of Madison to Myrtle also. She tells the rest of the council that Myrtle has been in town for weeks under an alias while planning her coup, and Fiona shows the Council pictures of Myrtle’s I HATE FIONA SHRINE in her hotel room. A flustered Myrtle shouts “SHE HAD TO BE STOPPED”. She either confessed or not confessed under Fiona’s damning “evidence”. Did Fiona manufacture this evidence? #ReasonableDoubt.

Then Fiona demonstrates her final and strongest evidence against Myrtle.  Fiona grabs Myrtle’s fashionably red leather gloved hand, “You have been caught red-handed.” Myrtle winces in pain and shrieks “You are hurting me” as Fiona yanked the glove off of her hand to show burn marks on it; supposed residual burns from Cordelia’s acid attack. Myrtle looks at her burned hand in bewilderment. The Council is hastily convinced by Fiona’s evidence, and Myrtle is immediately sentenced to burn to death….I can’t believe it was that easy to give a death sentence that has not been used since 1926. Plus I find it interesting that Myrtle is the Guardian of Veracity in the Vernacular and found guilty of these crimes……Myrtle was very dignified in her acceptance of her death sentence. In her youth she felt like a freak until she found her Coven. She had spent her life swimming against the tide. She thought she had finally found a place for herself in the Coven. She was wrong. She wanted it to be over. “I go proudly into the flames,” she said. “Go ahead. Burn me.”

Well time for a good old fashioned witch burning, and cue up the fabulous jazzy funky groovy “Right Place, Wrong Time” by Dr. John, a New Orleans music legend who is in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. It was a hilariously weird yet appropriate choice. With everyone dressed in fashionable modern BLACK, Fiona walks side by side with Myrtle in her plain white Salem style robe and led the Coven, the Council, and the albino security men in a funeral march through the high mounds of gravel that surrounded & shielded them to Myrtles final spot at the stake….


SIDE BAR: Dr. John was fascinated with New Orleans voodoo practices. He gained fame as a solo artist after adopting the persona of Dr. John, and he combined his music with elaborate stage shows that bordered on voodoo ceremonies. The name “Dr. John” came from a legendary REAL life Louisiana male voodoo practitioner of the early 19th century, a male version of Marie Laveau.  And showing that every detail has a purpose in the AHS series, musician Dr. John also wrote a song titled “Marie Laveau” in 2011. SIDE BAR ENDS

Zoe expresses her disbelief about what is happening.  Queenie says “You don’t mess with the Supreme.” The albino men poured gasoline on Myrtle, soaking her fiery red hair. Fiona is grinning and holding her lit cigarette, and she asks Myrtle “any last words?”  Myrtle declares “You’re all a bunch of little toads in a pot that Fiona is slowly bringing to boil. You won’t even feel it until it’s too late. I’d rather burn than boil.” Without hesitation Fiona flicks her burning cigarette at Myrtle igniting her fiery death. Zoe is STUNNED as we see the reflection of Myrtles burning body in her eyes…. There NEEDS to be an award for BEST CIGARETTE in a TV show because it is an often used prop in Fiona’s juiciest scenes.

Back at the Academy, Queenie asks Fiona, “Did I help you frame a guilty woman or an innocent one?” We see a flashback of the Council session when Fiona was laying out the evidence against Myrtle. Queenie is outside in the hallway, and she is using her pain transference power on Myrtle’s hands to give her those burns that resulted in her death sentence. Queenie only helped Fiona because she saved her life after the Minotuar attack. Queenie is guilt ridden about her part in Myrtles death. She can’t live with what she has done. Fiona starts to schmooze Queenie by telling her she is getting stronger as a witch, and that she could be the first black Supreme. #DianaRoss…. Queenie is sucked in by Fiona’s manipulation…. I want to know why Fiona didn’t use her power of erasing her memory/mind control as we have seen her do before.  #PlotHoles….

Spalding is in his attic bedroom wearing his granny bonnet and nightgown prancing around to music while overusing the spray air deodorizer during another tea party for the dead. He opens a smelly trunk, and a lace dressed Madison is awkwardly curled up in it. He accidently pulls her arm off of her decaying body, and drops it to the floor as he gives a childlike expression of OOPSIE. #GrandGuignolTheatre

Back at the gravel yard, the remains of a charred & burned Myrtle is being eaten by dogs. Misty Day approaches and the dogs scatter. Misty holds Myrtles head, and then her eyes OPEN wide….THE END

Well scurrdy cats that sure was a wild ride of a show. The constant theme of this show was the complicated mother/daughter issues, and to NOT mess with Fiona when she is smoking…. Is Myrtle only partially guilty? Who attacked Cordelia? Did she get some new truth powers as a secondary result of her attack? Who is the new Supreme & why do you think so? ….. I love the semi-smart discussions so please share your thoughts below….You can follow me on twitter @Urethra_F .


Filed under American Horror Story :Coven, Recap

75 responses to “American Horror Story: Coven Episode 5 Recap “Burn,Witch. Burn!”

  1. Every time we have seen Queenie’s voodoo doll powers in the past, there has been intense pain involved. If she did the acid trick in the house while the council was there…. Why didn’t it hurt?

    ALL I HAVE BIG NEWS! AHS has been renewed for SEASON FOUR and Jessica Lange is for sure onboard. YAY!

    • Urethra Franklin

      It did hurt Myrtle. At the exact time that Queenie did it, Fiona grabbed Myrtles had to remove her gloves. Myrtle shrieked, “You are hurting me”. Myrtle did feel the pain.

      • If you say so. I think the guy who Queenie burned with the fire HOWLED like a hurt dog. Myrtle just seemed to be trying to get Fiona to let go of her hand.

        On Thu, Nov 7, 2013 at 7:48 PM, Tamara Tattles

      • Urethra Franklin

        Yes narrative was sloppy about this plot point but here is the difference.
        The guy was burned on his entire arm with oil that was sizzling in a deep frier.
        Myrtle was burned just on her hand with just a small glass of acid.

      • Comere, let me put your hand in sulfuric acid as a test of your theory. THINK YOU MIGHT SCREAM? #plothole

        On Thu, Nov 7, 2013 at 8:53 PM, Tamara Tattles

      • Urethra Franklin

        The contents of Queenie’s glass had a funky color too. I thought maybe it was anti-freeze. Doesn’t that stuff burn LESS than sulfuric acid?


        On Thu, Nov 7, 2013 at 9:15 PM, Tamara Tattles

      • James

        Perhaps queenie’s power has an emotional component? She was pissed off at the guy in the chicken shack but looked pretty conflicted over framing myrtle

    • JoJo

      That 4th season news, best ever, ESPECIALLY, since Jessica Lange is associated with it, I hear for the last time….she best be getting that Emmy Golden Globe, SuperNoval, and anything else awarded when time comes next year!
      The measly “ouch, you’re hurting me” by Myrtle: can only think of 1) production didn’t think about it or care; 2) it was just a dip of 3 fingers quickly into the glass by Queenie and Queenie wasn’t looking at her which I thought she had to look at the victim anyway for that power to work: or 3) witchy and/or witchy hands have pain tolerance to burning – a genetic thing from the Salem days on the stake? But she howled like a hit dog at her own inflammation on the stake, that’s for sure:)

    • Urethra Franklin

      The rumor about the concept for the 4th season is Jessica will be playing a Marlene Dietrich inspired vampire in a circus/carnival setting. Just a rumor, but if true, I WILL DIE… I want this to be true. AHS needs to do vampires next.

      • JoJo

        GENIUS, GOD, I hope that’s true, then she can retire with my blessing!!!!!!

      • RoxiBalboa

        just an FYI, I watched some show where Ryan and Brad were interviewed. When discussing future seasons Ryan said the one subject they would never do was vampires

      • Urethra Franklin

        Roxi I read that also, but wasn’t that from years ago? It’s disappointing because they are creative enough to do some crazy stuff with it. But I have read of the carnival/circus theme since last year, so maybe it is just a baseless rumor. But I can dream right?

      • JoJo

        Urethra, as a madwoman AHS fan as you know, I’ve never heard, seen, read that Murphy or Falchuk said anything about limiting their horrors. Now, granted, they don’t call or contact me and the web is too big for me not to miss something. BUT, if ever in this decade there was a time to do vampires, this is it.
        I mean with their talent and their track record and maybe twisted minds – can’t you just imagine racist, gay-religious-political bashing, or cheating & criminal vampires?)) I’m going to keep my fingers crossed as long as I have them!

      • Urethra Franklin

        I agree JoJo. They probably feel the market is over saturated with vampire films & tv. Boohoo next summer is the LAST season of True Blood. That is one fun crazy ass show.

  2. SaraK

    Ok my fellow AHS folks I have questions. Why can Fiona bring a dead baby back to life but didn’t heal Cordelia? Where did Zoe put her balls between the time she screwed the second boy to death and finding that chain saw? Does she have a velvet bag she puts them in and only pulls them out for special occasions? How does someone who pulled out eyeballs and intestines of slaves so quickly, not just thank a black woman, but freaken sob into her bossom. This is not you garden variety clan member…she created a damn Minitor out of Bastian. On a night full of zombies…where was our favorite one, FK (FrankenKyle).

    Answer these questions if you can.

    • FrankenKyle was wandering around and everyone likely thought he was in costume. Fiona it seemed could not save the baby, the mother had to repeat the spell. Zoe’s new power is NEW. and unrelated to her deadly pussy. No idear on why Delphine is such a pussy. Maybe being made immortal fucked her up?

      On Thu, Nov 7, 2013 at 8:43 PM, Tamara Tattles

    • Urethra Franklin

      I think Zoe’s sudden confidence is due to her growing powers.
      Maybe she is getting stronger from both Cordelia who is weakend after the attack, and some strength from Fiona who has cancer.

      And yes I want to know why Fiona did not use a spell/powers to heal Cordelia. #PlotHoles

      • JoJo

        UF, that was why I ‘conjured’ up the theory that Fiona CAN’T heal – that that power is not one of those ‘7 wonder’ things she displayed to become supreme. Misty is the bringer back of the dead and ill (so far as we’ve seen). I foresee Misty being around a lot from now on, and I hear she’s going to be crazyass scary busy!

      • Urethra Franklin

        Yes Jojo, I’ve read some reliable spoilers about Misty too. My lips are sealed until the right time.

      • JoJo

        LOL, you Diva-diver or whatever TT called you! Now Misty has Myrtle, FrankenKyle, and Zoe loves FrankenKyle & Voodoo Marie would do anything to put Fiona’s lights out. So there’s a small group of people on a mission against Fiona. Even if Misty brings Madison back (I’m not sure about that one-armed thing though), she’s prob not fond of Fiona. Delia never liked her mother and she’s got that pretty nifty new psychic power via touch and I hear she’s going to be showing a lot of crazyass scary too. So, unless she has change of heart on mommy dearest, I’d say Fiona has more witches against her than for, and might need more than Seven Wonders with this group!!!

    • James

      1. The powers of resurgence and healing seem to be separate. Fiona wasn’t able to heal queenie after the minotaur and needed cordelia to do it yet she was able to bring her back to life when she stopped breathing.

      2. Zoe had balls with the whole madison situation. I think if the council, fiona or even cordelia had been around for the zombies, zoe would have stayed in the background. But since she had no one else to rely on she was forced to take care of business.

      3. Madame delphine had had like 100+ years to reflect. She also felt indebted to queenie for saving her from the minotaur.

      4. Kyle was trick or treating.

  3. U.F. I must blame this on you! I now have “gypsy” stuck in my head! :ove Fleetwood Mac but it’s going on day 5 with this song trapped. Ugh! Guess I need to go find video on Youtube and maybe the song will go away.

  4. steve

    it was Zoes power that Marie noted was stronger now in that witch house. Myrtle and Misty both burned in this season and Misty is trying to fit in and now has Myrtle to be in her band. There is something they havent shown us about who told the people to burn Misty. Cmon next week!! We didnt get to see Kyle this week though next week we will find he has been busy

  5. Don’t kill me UF, but it has already been brought up…
    Hell, March 13, 1919

    Esteemed Mortal:

    They have never caught me and they never will. They have never seen me, for I am invisible, even as the ether that surrounds your earth. I am not a human being, but a spirit and a demon from the hottest hell. I am what you Orleanians and your foolish police call the Axeman.

    When I see fit, I shall come and claim other victims. I alone know whom they shall be. I shall leave no clue except my bloody axe, besmeared with blood and brains of he whom I have sent below to keep me company.

    If you wish you may tell the police to be careful not to rile me. Of course, I am a reasonable spirit. I take no offense at the way they have conducted their investigations in the past. In fact, they have been so utterly stupid as to not only amuse me, but His Satanic Majesty, Francis Josef, etc. But tell them to beware. Let them not try to discover what I am, for it were better that they were never born than to incur the wrath of the Axeman. I don‘t think there is any need of such a warning, for I feel sure the police will always dodge me, as they have in the past. They are wise and know how to keep away from all harm.

    Undoubtedly, you Orleanians think of me as a most horrible murderer, which I am, but I could be much worse if I wanted to. If I wished, I could pay a visit to your city every night. At will I could slay thousands of your best citizens, for I am in close relationship with the Angel of Death.

    Now, to be exact, at 12:15 (earthly time) on next Tuesday night, I am going to pass over New Orleans. In my infinite mercy, I am going to make a little proposition to you people. Here it is:

    I am very fond of jazz music, and I swear by all the devils in the nether regions that every person shall be spared in whose home a jazz band is in full swing at the time I have just mentioned. If everyone has a jazz band going, well, then, so much the better for you people. One thing is certain and that is that some of your people who do not jazz it on Tuesday night (if there be any) will get the axe.

    Well, as I am cold and crave the warmth of my native Tartarus, and it is about time I leave your earthly home, I will cease my discourse. Hoping that thou wilt publish this, that it may go well with thee, I have been, am and will be the worst spirit that ever existed either in fact or realm of fancy.

    The Axeman [7]

    • Urethra Franklin

      You witch.
      I had already planned to tease your readers about this next week.

      • Don’t DIVA ME AT MY BLOG! We all got bored out of our minds today with no posts. Perhaps we looked elsewhere. ‘

        I am trying to teach you that a PERFECT blog days later doesn’t get the hits that a shitty one does, right afterward.


        On Thu, Nov 7, 2013 at 9:17 PM, Tamara Tattles

  6. steve

    thats Kyles story for next week. Unsolved mamma type murders. After 180 years buried in a box gave Delphine time to think about her life and family being the last thing she saw was them swinging from a rope. UF last night when TT was confused by cordelias baby i was hoping you would tell her that wasnt acid but boiled baby batter in her face and thats a quick knock-up

    • Urethra Franklin

      As inappropriate as I am capable of, I never thought of that….
      Did you like the Dr. John sidebar? I learned that stuff today. I had no idea.

      • MinotaurMick

        I suggested the baby batter last week as the mason/ball jar was the same one burning in the #MarieFeralCatConjuring scene!!!

      • Did they show anything about the lady that Hank shot? It would be interesting if she got the “baby gravy” from Cordelia’s husband instead of Cordelia and was the person that threw it on her. I’m glad I don’t read spoilers, there’s so many ways they can go with this series.

      • Urethra Franklin

        BelowSea, no nothing more on that story yet. I still think Hank is somehow indirectly linked to Cordelia’s attack.

      • the axe man cometh………

        On Fri, Nov 8, 2013 at 9:47 PM, Tamara Tattles

  7. steve

    yes i really liked that. I didnt know how into voodoo he was just enjoyed the music. I also learned about french theatre with this one too. Thanx for doing this.

  8. JoJo

    OMG, Urethra, bravo. Where to start?
    First, got same connection about chainsaw and I titled that scene “New Orleans Academy for Exceptional Chainsaw Massacres” – and agree zombies and The Walking dead are the least of my favorite scary creatures. But in this case didn’t bother me as much since it’s AHS – it has license to be silly for me:) But, re “plotholes” – I want to know while Zoe’s slicing & dicing limbs, heads etc. to eradicate the pesky creatures (& before she ‘incantates’ the last one to be it’s own nature to ‘re-death’), why in the hell was Madame able to kill Borquita by impaling with a fire poke? I thought it was decapitation or limb removal at the very least – what are zombie-killing rules? Anyone know?
    Moreover, it’s been discussed that Queenie and her self-mutilation transference is only achievable when she ‘sees’ her victims, thus unable to prevent Bastien/Mintotaur beastman from hurting her; BUT when she acid washed Myrtle’s hand, she was standing behind a wall? #plothole?
    So many zingers, you mentioned some, I’ll add Queenie” I thought you wanted to oust her not roast her.”
    I have all sorts of ?? about the hospital scenes: Fiona had started in waiting room w/ her own drugs, then proceeds wandering through halls, to me in hallucinatory state, bumping and sliding (I thought it looked like credit card, not finger, but don’t have DVR) until she lands in the Pill Closet. In an even more hallucinating affect with the fish-eyed camera and blinking lights effects, my theory is what ensued was only partially real. Just a thought, but her wandering into the grieving mom w/ stillborn baby could be actually hallucination of representation of the mom being Fiona in the 70’s and the baby was Cordelia and how she was revived. Maybe it was Misty who popped in there during Delia’s still birth, and incanted those words to Fiona. I mean what hospital would ever leave a dead baby right next to a grieving mother and NOT A SOUL from the hospital is there? Don’t mother’s give birth with doctors/nurses around in an operating-type room and if a baby is still born, whisk it off and someone stays around the mom – not leave mom and dead baby in a room by themselves. The mom to me even looked a little dated (like the hair). Just a theory.
    I think Fiona manufactured evidence for ‘half-guilty’ poor Myrtle. She seems to really have been in the Big Easy during Delia’s attack, and I think the pics on the hotel room wall were probably real – I mean she’s had it in for Fiona herself. But what I question is, Myrtle being the veracity/vernacular etc thing, and seemed to have actually RAISED, nurtured, even probably tempered Cordelia’s personality her whole life, I doubt she would throw acid in her eyes. First, doesn’t further her agenda at all against Fiona or help reveal Fiona’s real crimes against the coven. But the fact that she actually mothered Delia, is why I don’t think it was her at all. (ASIDE: I don’t know if it’s been mentioned, but Myrtle’s pseudo hotel registration name was “Jennifer Wooley” played by Veronica Lake in “I Married a Witch” – oh that Murphy).
    Also think Frankenkyle found his way back to the swamp shacking up with Misty-Stevie. Lily Rabe’s interview said their relationship became real close, caretaker kind of thing.
    I can’t stop trying to figure these people out, so sorry for TMI, have so much more.
    But finally, I don’t think right now, Fiona actually knows how Zoe face-palm-incantated the last zombie to death; think she only knows about Chainsaw Zoe’s taking control. That’ll give Zoe some time to live a little longer, no? Don’t think Zoe even knew about that power, I mean zombie killing is a good skill to have:))

    • Urethra Franklin

      I did consider it was a hallucination or dream of some sort. Some things I tried to interpret, and some things I just described on the surface. This show is such a mind fuck. If was the Mother was indeed a young Fiona, it would have been clearer to the audience to use the young woman we already have seen play the young Fiona. But it could just be a hallucinogenic interpretation….So you think that baby represented Cordelia’s first few moments after her birth, and that is why she is infertile? …. So much room for interpretation and everyone sees something different, as do I as you all comment here. Thank you. …P.S. Fiona definitely used her fingernails to swipe the door entry system.

      • JoJo

        UF, I have to give steve credit for pointing out to me the connection with the infertility thing, which reinforces (in my mind) my theory; and I’m thinking that Fiona being pregnant is actually mid to late 20’s….older than when we saw her as the academy ingénue murderous. So that helps her looking older to me. But you’re so right, this is such a mindf#$k in a good way, who knows what the hell will be revealed. (I hope I’m a little right though since my mind hurts:))

      • I agree UF. If the stillborn baby (Cordelia)was dead long enough, all of her eggs would be damaged, useless or dissolved by the time she is re-animated, hence Cordelia’s fertility problems. Fiona had a flashback and it was HER drug-induced mind’s version. Love how all the commenters here are so articulate, analytic and creative with their AHS observations! Love the show and love this site. Thanks TT

      • Urethra Franklin

        And yes I love the quality of discussions going on here too.

  9. steve

    JoJo that would explain why maybe Cordelia cant get pregnant. Queenie kept her eye on the prize with a reflection in picture glass.

    • JoJo

      Ah ha, steve, now I missed that reflection part TUVM!!! And my mind so hyperventilating, didn’t even think of that additional component of Delia’s infertility and being stillborn. All those plot point components make so much sense to me, AHS production has no idea how deflated I’ll be if none of my predictions have ANY basis in fantasy:))

  10. JoJo

    My last solo comment since I’ve thought myself to death; last night was almost all about bad mothering. Now Madame Maid, whose horrific & heinious crimes against mankind should garner Zero sympathy period, but played by Kathy Bates, I can’t believe I root for her rehab after 180 years buried. Her trying to accept with whatever dignity she has left her menial position, protecting, caring and crumbling in Queenie’s arms, caring and sympathy trying to bond with Fiona – genius acting.
    Madame’s only power is not dying & hatred still for Voodoo Marie. That just might come in handy for Fiona’s upcoming Battle of the Witches!
    What a wild ride, just can’t figure out where Hore Hank comes in!

    • Urethra Franklin

      Yes mother/daughter story lines were very prominent for this episode. Everyone hates their mother, Kyle included.

    • Urethra Franklin

      JoJo you have a lot good information about future story lines. Would you mind sharing any good link that you think would interest me to my twitter account. If you don’t have twitter, I will be happy to give you my email. UF.

      • JoJo

        Oh my gosh Urethra, I swear on ‘my mother’s grave’ I have ZERO info on future story lines. I just read Ryan Murphy’s post mortems which for him amazingly gives some pretty good answers to what happened in past episode and then offers up teasers of what to expect in future. I guess he feels there’s so much in his story-telling and twists, I guess he doesn’t feel letting us in on a couple things will ruin our experience for future. I’m amazed at his candidness this season. I think it’s EW where he does those. I thought you read those post mortems too??
        Other than that I only read a select few recaps from sites/bloggers that are interesting to me: Vulture, Hitfix, AVClub, EW.
        Did I actually say something seriously that may be really happening in the future tonight? I’m just an excited long-time fan with a wild ass imagination, loving recaps (yours now one of my favs, take bow) and I guess Murphy’s “pre caps”!!

      • JoJo

        Shite, Urethra, I just re-read & see the Twitter request or email. I don’t have Twitter, and now it’s too late to take all that back. So sorry;(

    • Hadn’t thought of that until – bad parenting at its worst. But I loved it!!!

  11. Urethra Franklin

    Jojo, it will put a smile on my face if you just once actually spell out shit, fuck, or whore.

    • JoJo

      UF, LOL, I have no idea why I don’t….I read the rules of engagement for TT and although I am product of 12 years Catholic school, I could also be mistaken for cussing like a truck driver since then! Note taken, sonofabitch, shitfuck!

  12. Urethra Franklin

    Does anybody else think that the show could go way to left and reveal that Luke is the new Supreme? We still have 8 episodes for the story to develop. A lot happens in just one episode.

    • Yes, I guessed Luke as supreme in a comment to your recap or precap last week. He was in the room when the curtains lit up and he was mad at his mom when the knife went flying, just like Madison. That’s the only reason I thought that, though, trying to make sense of Madison not being the supreme. Nan didn’t seem angry, maybe disappointed? There are obviously plot holes, so maybe that’s one of them that won’t lead anywhere.

      I like to go a little “far” out there, but I would LOVE if Luke’s mom turns out to be a voodoo priestess living next door. Luke can be supreme and mom can be on the opposite side, then my AHS Coven dreams will come true. More local musicians, more Dr. John and play some of The Meters thrown in and I’ll be happy, happy.

      The Axeman scares the hell out of me.

      • Urethra Franklin

        I want to know where the hell his mother was when he was out all night next door at the zombie orgy….and slept there overnight… you would think she would come a knocking. #PlotHoles

    • JoJo

      UF, I too have thoughts of Luke being more than meets the eye so far. Murphy said something about there are men in the coven whose sole purpose is to serve the coven, like granny tea, necro-loving Spalding and prob those albinos we saw at the burnt offering of Myrtle; then there are men who are male witches (I guess warlocks, like the adorable campy, bestselling author, Quentin who’s on the council). Although he said that Luke is attracted to Nan for he senses her purity resembling his own nature It’s a strong attraction maybe since she’s also one of his own kind – basically the good little witch and hunky warlock lovefest?
      I also think there’s more to his holy-roller mommy, like maybe she went all 180 to distance herself of being born a witch maybe? That would also make Luke a SOW (Son of a Witch).
      Wouldn’t it be interesting to see somewhere down the line a little witch-off between Jessica/Fiona and Joan/Patti LuPone?

      • Y’all really think dumbass Luke who wandered out into the yard full of zombies thinking they were trick or treaters and just stood there while they came for him screaming like a little girl until Nan saved him is the supreme? as if.

        On Fri, Nov 8, 2013 at 1:06 PM, Tamara Tattles

      • JoJo

        TT, NO, at best, Luke might be a pussy warlock, but Supreme, I don’t get that sense at all:)

      • JoJo

        Unless Nene’s speed-dial friend a/k/a Glee employer is playing us all, there’s not enough letters in the word ‘he’ for the next Supreme:)

      • It would be fun to see what ensues with Luke’s mom if he was supreme. Not likely, but still would be fun. I wonder if we’ll find out where his mom was Halloween night with the zombie attack, and how did he slip away from her to visit next door and stay out all night.

  13. James


  14. MinotaurMick

    #dianaross…brilliant! necrophiliac tea party…LOL! UF…u done outdone urself!!

  15. LoriNYC

    I especially loved the whole “Mother & Daughter” theme of this episode! Fiona is such a disturbed, complex, angry, vengeful woman but she’s portrayed in such a way that you can’t even hate her. Jessica Lange better win EVERY award for her role this season. BRILLIANT!

  16. Urethra Franklin

    I’m starting to think that the whole mother/still born scene was a hallucination brought on by guilt and grief. It was something to soothe her pain to make her feel better as human being.

    • JoJo

      Glad to hear you say that – so hope for our ((viewers) sakes – we’re right or at least in the ballpark, although our hallucination of who stillborn/mom is a little different.

      (I’m sure you’ve read by now the newest ‘interview/re-cap/pre-cap’) I mentioned about this??? (For all the info, not a word on this hospital/stillborn stranger/hallucination theory we’ve talked about – he’s giving good teaser, but definitely not enough to spoil anything or anyone of us – damnit to hell!:)

  17. I liked Spaulding’s tea attire much better last time. This episode’s outfit did nothing for him.

  18. Xanadude

    Maybe it’s my MLS kicking in (yes, your become a Librarian and it becomes encoded in your DNA) but we should start annotating these episodes. :)

    • Urethra Franklin

      I try to explain what I can on the fly. Somethings are obvious for interpretation, and somethings just fly over my head. It’s 2 days later, and I’ve reinterpreted some scenes a few times over.

  19. ‘There are serial killing stories, prison stories, true crime stories… Each year of the show is designed to be a little miniseries unto itself. The only thing we’re not open to doing is a season on vampires.” – Ryan Murphy

    Granted this was after the first season… They may have changed their minds. Source link:

  20. Kam

    After last weeks episode, and Zoe took control of the situation aka Texas Chainsaw style (lol), it would not surprise me if she is indeed the new “Supreme.”

    • Urethra Franklin

      I think Zoe is just one big red herring. It would be just too easy for it to be her.

      • JoJo

        I’m in absolute agreement on Zoe being a red herring. It’s so obvious considering her star billing, her seeming meekness, and some kind of extra power I don’t know what the hell to call – I mean it was face-palming a zombie back to death. Considering the dubious ‘power’ of a killer vagina, the zombies are gone now I assume for the rest of the season, is this new power a killer power?

  21. Xanadude

    Speaking of, Google the words Tarot, haunted, and vagina for a comic book cover that obviously inspired Zoe. And its not a porn comic book, just in very dubious taste

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