It’s Round Two at The Venetian. For some reason I thought we already did this. Right off the bat it is all giggles and a humorous name calling reel.
Oh Lord, someone asks Teresa about the meaning of a sociopath and she says she was unaware they were in school today.
Someone is pissed that Caroline laughed when her boys talked about fat girls being blow jobs queens. Well, we are! Is that a bad thing? Jesus, lighten up Francis. I’m sure there is a point to sleeping with botoxed anorexics as well, though nothing is coming to me at the moment.
Juicy claims that he has never used the word cunt before that one time it was caught on camera. You should see Caroline’s face. I am eating for the first time all day while this is on, so I keep pausing the DVR to take a bite. Every time it is frozen on Teresa, she looks sad, and medicated and she is looking down. Teresa claims that Joe never called her a cunt. I dunno why we are rehashing last season.
Juicy is very chatty. He is jumping in to defend Teresa over the slightest thing.
Caroline is asked about her father-in-law and she shares some childhood stories of snow shoveling punishments. Then Andy asks about Albert’s fathers death. He asks her twice. Caroline says she does not want to know. She launches into the story about the day they found his father (rumor has it in a car trunk, dead) the police came to the door at 4 am and told them. It was her birthday. Albert went out and picked up her birthday present and brought it back to her and said he was sorry her birthday was ruined. Caroline says, Andy, I don’t want to go back there. And whoever doesn’t get it can go fuck themselves. Andy, says “I get it now.” Point Caroline Manzo. That was a very tacky road for Andy to go down in the first damn place.
Time to talk jail time ! Joe says he has his driver’s license back and that is why he is driving. A viewer asks Teresa if she believes her current legal problems are karma. Tre says no, she doesn’t believe in karma. She’s catholic and the reason why she said karma in Arizona is because there was karma all over the place. It was on sweatshirts and everything! It’s like a thing in Arizona! So that is why she said karma to Jac. Rosie doesn’t know what karma is. I doubt Tre does either. Andy says he thinks Teresa has said karma on the show before. Teresa says that people on twitter are always telling her that this is her karma. She doesn’t know why this “came to them.” She says there are things in life that you have no control over ( like being charged with 39 counts of fraud in a federal indictment, or you know, getting run over by a bus) that you just learn from it. Andy points out that some would argue that you do have control over it. Tre stutters and says it is in God’s hands.
Caroline is asked about a comment she made that Juicy would be happy living in a cardboard box but Teresa is the one who wants an opulent life. Does Caroline think Teresa is the cause of their legal situation? Caroline says he is a man trying to do what a man does and make his wife happy. As for the charges, I don’t know much about them and it is not my place to cast blame.
Joe Gorga says when he heard the news he got depressed. Again I have the picture frozen on Tre and she is looking down and away from Joe as he talks. This woman is very close to the edge. Joe says it’s too hard for him to talk about.
This whole conversation about the legal issues is getting uncomfortable and sad. Teresa keeps saying she really doesn’t know why this is happening to them. I’m starting to believe that she really doesn’t know. Juicy says he can’t allow himself to go there. He has to stay positive for his family. He just wants it to be over. Pretty much everyone is crying except Teresa and Juicy.
Once again, Andy says that Caroline experience with this because Albert’s best friend, the police commissioner went to jail. Andy had to dig all the way back to season one for that jab. Caroline says you will soon find out who your real friends are. And she also said, “if things go the way everyone says they are going to go…” So clearly everyone knows they are going to the big house.
If you could have done one thing different on any season, what would it be? Jac says she would have been quieter on the last reunion. Caroline says she would have been sick all of season four. Melissa says is stumped. Kathy says she would have tried to reach out to Teresa more before she joined the show to let her know she was not out to get her. Teresa says that with Jac she …stutters… basically she said she wishes she would have been there for Jac more. Melissa finally comes up with filming more with Teresa and the kids.
Andy asks if anyone has any final words and Teresa says she felt like everyone attacked her all season and Caroline hurt her feelings when she called her superficial ( clearly if she knew that word, she would know she is the poster child for superficial, she’s truly clueless).
Caroline is pissed. Crap my stupid DVR cut off Caroline’s last words. It is clear to me that she is about to say she is not coming back. I just want to see if she said it! She says she cannot deal with Teresa anymore. She’s 52 years old and wants to enjoy her life. What did I miss?