Time to see what evil misogyny and humiliation Andrew has in store for us via the mouth of Danielle Staub. But first, WHAT THE FUCK HAS HE DONE TO HIS HAIR? Is his new husband of the Kayne West ilk that gives their partner a makeover? He’s been such a mess lately! Oh Lord, this is an AWFUL NIGHT for Andy’s mother to bartend! They must have had a cancellation at the last minute when someone went to jail. Also, Andy and Anderson usually go to the DVF Fashion Show together and he took his mother…interesting.
Why is Andy already acting like he is going easy on her? What is the point of this if not complete annihilation of Teresa?
Danielle says she was never friends with Danny, she was friends with his wife and he threatened someone (sounded like she was trying to say production) in order to film. She says it wasn’t a good look for her. Andy is in dangerous unchartered waters without a life vest already. Danielle says she doesn’t hang out with people like that.
Then he plays her lesbian serenade on a previous club house visit. And the shade begins.
And here we go, with the big question, “How do you feel about the charges against Teresa and Joe?” She says, ” I feel bad for them. They’re people. They are a family. And things that are really bad are happening to them. It would be really wrong for anyone to enjoy that.”
Do you have any contact with any of your former castmates? No.
Andy asks what she does for a living. She says, ” She says she created her own show. It’s a reality show that is filming right now.”
Danielle says she is straight now and no longer bicurious. And you will have to watch her show to see if she is in a relationship. ( I’ll pass on that. And I am already bored with episode; but, I will solider on for you my dear readers.) After leaving the housewives show, she moved and turned the house over to her ex-husband. Whatever that means.
Kim G is tweeting that Danielle owes her $100K or something. Caroline has repeatedly stated she regrets her involvement in the Danielle drama, and Andy plays a clip. Danielle says she is not buying it and there are some groans from the clubhouse guests. Whoever is in the audience tonight is not team Danielle. Then again, is anyone? He plays a couple of clips of Tre saying decent enough things about her. Danielle says she loves Tre. Tre was in a hard place with her old friends and trying to begin new friendships. WTF? This is ridiculous.
In the Jacqueline clip, Jac says Danielle stalks her and says horrible things to her. Danielle says Jac needs to put the wine away and possibly seek help for that. She has nothing nice to say about Jac. Why are all these grown-assed women so concerned with what people they don’t know or like say about them on twitter? Why do they even read it? Not to mention some of the men. I’m looking at you Joe Gorga. I don’t think I’ve ever dated a straight man who even knew Twitter existed. It’s insane to me. Danielle is the “worst example of someone creating a truth.”
Danielle says that Melissa asks her to film with her in season two as a way to get back at Teresa. Danielle said she refused to do that. She did say she would forward all of her emails to producers and she did. She says that is how Melissa came from being behind the scenes to a frontline story. Essentially, she says she is responsible for getting Melissa on the show. She also says that Melissa needs to just come clean with that. Danielle says she wanted nothing to do with what she wanted to do to Teresa. Blah, blah, blah, Karma. Has Danielle been sent to etiquette classes, public speaking classes and intensive public relations instruction? She is really trying to , and partially succeeding in, making herself look like a productive human being.
Andy says before this show she told him she views the current housewives as criminals. She says yes, not all of them, but the bulk. YOU DON’T SAY!
Danielle asks Andy why he said she was fired after she left the show in season two. Andy gets all squirmy. Danielle said it caused her problems with other work. He says he isn’t sure he really said that. He said it was a mutual decision, we didn’t think it was working and you didn’t want to come back. In other words, he said it because she was fired but now that she is sitting right there whining about it, he is going to pussy foot around the issue. Andy says if there is a quote out there from me about that, I apologize. She thanks him for it. The whole thing was awkward and the audience laughed at her some more.
During the commercial there was apparently a heated discussion. When they came back, Andy says to his mother, “I just got read by Danielle!” He’s nervous and irritated. They took no phone questions but will during the live after show. Y’all let me know how that goes. It seems to me like that was just another “closure interview” a la Jill Zarin. I don’t know why fired housewives return to the clubhouse. It’s never a good look.