Before we even start, can someone explain to me who is dressing Andy lately? What is with all the hideous ties and no socks. He wore NO SOCKS for the Oprahcalpse and he is sockless again tonight wearing saddle shoes! I personally hate socks and rarely wear them, but with saddle shoes? That has to hurt! His wardrobe has really gone down.
I am ten minutes in to the reunion and there is nothing interesting to report. I don’t want to talk about Lydia’s mom’s pot smoking or Tamra’s teary suicide story. Let’s get to something interesting. I do love the audience comment that Tamra has been a bitch for six seasons, one speech is not going to change your image. I love how Andrew let’s the viewers make all the nasty observations and completely keeps the blood off his beige suit.
It is time to bash Gretchen. I wonder if when Bravo targets a housewife for the shitty edit if they get a financial bonus. I think they should. First up, Gretchen’s behavior because Tamra invited Alexis to go dress shopping. Now Alexis feels like she was not wanted at the dress shopping scene. Gretchen has brought in emails from Tamra saying she did not want her there. Tamra says she lied to Gretchen because she is so jealous of her other friendships. Gretchen has another email that says when the scene airs of her (Tamra) making up with Alexis to remind her that she still hates her. I believe Gretchen. However, Gretchen is really going after Alexis saying everyone hates her and she is the only one who is honest about it.
There is a screechy “own your evil” argument that ensues. I’ll spare you.
Wow. They are actually going to discuss the “Bride Wars” of Orange County. Behind the scenes in the OC, there was a Battle Royale for who would get the Bravo Wedding Show. Both Gretchen and Tamra wanted it and were fighting for it tooth and nail. Tamra won and then stories began to leak everywhere about the “fake proposal.” It was a race to the altar and Gretchen lost. Rumor had it that Slade was unwilling to propose. The next thing you know we have this elaborate Gretchen proposal TO Slade which for me was the height of desperation for any housewife of any franchise.
Malibu Country time! Heather of course wants to tell the story. Essentially, MC wanted a housewife to play a tiny walk on part as herself. Many were called and essentially none were chosen. Heather was cast for a real part. Because of the casting of Heather they could no longer use a real housewife because one would be in character and the other would not. I believe all of that. Gretchen has a voice mail from her agent saying they want her for MC on the day of the dress shopping. Gretchen decided to film the dress scene instead. This whole argument is ridiculous. I would like to point out that all of this is going on in a high pitched scream barely in the realm of human hearing levels and Banjo is annoyed and has left the room in disgust.
Alexis still thinks that Gretchen and some of the other girls are mean girls. She is sick of talking about it. One of the viewer questions was mean to Alexis and said that she doesn’t know the definition of a bully but that she does know the definition of a victim. Heather is all holier than though and annoying.
What is the story on Alexis’s jewelry? Why haven’t we heard a promotional acknowledgement for whoever lent them?
Vicki says that Gretchen’s engagement stunt was all done for the show. DUH! Alexis says that last year Gretchen didn’t even want to marry Slade. DUH! (Who would? What are is positive qualities again? Attractive? Minimally. Pleasant Personality? No. Intellectually stimulating? Not even at Gretchen’s level of intellect. Financially appealing? Hell no, he is a liability. What could anyone see in this man? Lydia says Gretchen did it for storyline because Gretchen did not have one. Even Heather says she watched it and she felt hollow. Remember, Heather and Lydia are the closest thing Gretchen has to allies. Tamra asks when she is getting married and Gretchen says she does not know. Heather seems to think that she should have invited her castmates and that is a reason for doubting the validity of her engagement. How ridiculous. None of these women are friends and Gretchen’s real friends were there. A viewer asks if Slade bought her a ring. She says they went in together on the ring. Oh how very sad.
They play the engagement and Gretchen starts to sob. Tamra gets up to go comfort her! Gretchen is hurt that everyone thinks her engagement is fake. Everyone back pedals and says they were just questioning the timing. Vicki even apologizes. Gretchen says the thing that hurt me the worst is that Alexis was not there. WTF? Where is that coming from. Gretchen has been treating Alexis like crap for two years? I don’t get it. When were they ever friends? Alexis has the same reaction.
Next week. I didn’t get whatever it was Vicki said that was so shocking? Anyone? And a showdown with Brianna and Brooks that has Vicki ready to quit the show forever.