And so am I! I have resolved my Internet issues and have been waiting to watch the premiere until I could blog while watching. It’s FINALLY time!
We are down to five ladies this season which usually makes for a better show, but I would have much rather have had Ana and Marysol than Lea and that slutty Polish chick whose name escapes me. Anyway, hey Bravo, where is the author credit for Lesley Abravanel’s Miami Herald story on Adriana’s marriage?
Are Purveyors of Pop still producing this show? The production is MILES better than it used to be, fresh editing, fantastic musical choices, eye catching scenery, it’s very well done so far.
YAY! Anna and Marysol are there! Those two and Alexia and Lisa are waiting on Adriana to plan her “wedding.” Ana and Lisa are already clashing. I understand why, but I hope Ana cuts Lisa some slack this season. Lisa is just very young and um, not as well-educated as Ana but I started to like Lisa last season and would like to see her with the fun girls and not the Polish chick and one with all the male criminal friends. Someone needs to look out for Lisa. Lisa said that Adriana and Marq were the only ones who came to her (unfilmed) 30th birthday party. That said, Lisa is the first to confront Adriana when she arrives to the bridal salon about the fact that she has been married for five years (not to mention her storyline was fear of commitment).
Adriana is trying to explain the fact that she has been lying about being married for five years. It makes absolutely no sense. I don’t just mean the accent and the unusual syntax. I mean that she is somehow blaming Marq for the lies she has told. The blame Marq storyline goes like this… Marq called off the wedding five years ago. This is a lie. They are married. Or sometimes she says they are technically married but she doesn’t feel married. Um, whatever. She has been married for five years. I have body dysmorphia in reverse. I don’t feel like a fat person. Or an old person. But that doesn’t change the fact that I am. Feelings do not influences facts in any language, Adriana. Not even the language of love.
Meanwhile, Lea takes whatsherface to the Jag dealership were Romain has apparently bought her a car. (I am literally still blanking on her name.) I think this sort of thing only happens on real housewives shows that are sponsored by the car company. I also don’t think the people get to keep the car after filming ends or else are offered a good price to purchase it. I would love whatever car my man decided to buy for me as a surprise, but honestly, I would much rather pick my own damn car. Can you imagine having to drive a corvette everyday for example? Have you ever gotten in and out of one of those things? They are dreadful. And hard to park. I want to pick my own colors and interior. Anyway, I digress.
OMG! Frankie! He is doing so great! I mean seriously. I followed his accident very closely and was very worried about him. He was treated for a long time in Atlanta at Shepard Spinal and I would tweet with Alexia while she was with him here. She is such a strong and admirable woman. Alexia’s mother in on for the first time and I love her already. Cuban grandmother word’s of wisdom, “The problem with men is they all have a castration complex. Since we were born already castrated we don’t have that problem.” Um, I will have to marinate on that one for a while. I predict Andy loves her. Oh she is a psychiatrist.
I can’t believe Alexia is going to discuss the situation with Peter. You may have read on other blogs (but not here) that Peter assaulted a homeless man and had a court appearance to be sentenced. With all the things going on with Alexia my heart just broke for her. It shows her strength to go on national television and admit that her son did a horrible thing. Peter doesn’t really speak to the issue at all and still seems lost.
Lea is redecorating or something. But whatever, Freda is back. It seems Lea has a birdbath in her ballroom. She does have some interesting art; but, I’m not kidding about the birdbath.
JOANNA! Finally someone said her name. Romain is still not giving Joanna any sex. He HAS to be gay. I hate Joanna and I am a straight female, and I’d chose her if I was taken hostage and forced to have lesbian sex! Physically, she is perfect. It’s the whole PETA intellect (now there is an oxymoron) that annoys the crap out of me. Adriana has arrived to Lisa’s with the rest of the girls for the first brawl of the season. Round one on the fight card is Lea v. Adriana. Lea forfeits by not showing up so Adriana wins by default. Adriana is now saying that Lea was her maid of honor at the wedding she denies having. Wait, what???
Everyone is going in on Lea in their talking heads and at Lisa’s party. Alexia says that Lea was trash talking her as a mother and saying that Peter deserved 25 years for his assault charge. Sure Peter was guilty and needed to pay for his awful crime, but Lea Black’s only friends are convicted felons and the worst humans on earth that her criminal defense attorney husband gets off. Really Lea?
OMG! Mama Elsa is not doing well! She had a head injury! Did I know this and just blocked it out? She had emergency brain surgery. It sounds like she has lost her speech. I am devastated and need to go read Marysol’s blog if she has one this season. What a horrible note to end on!
The previews look great. They show Mama Elsa talking and hanging out with Marysol, THANK GOD. And we have a couple bridezillas which should be fun. And a deeper look at Alexia and her boys. I can’t wait! But now, I have got to go buy Banjo some dog food before he chews my foot off due to hunger.