Perhaps that kid of Melissa’s is the smartest one in the family. Clearly, the girl knows how to pack for a mandatory Bravo retreat. I can’t think of anything better to bring besides Jesus, the Bible and a unicorn, unless it is a bottle of Chivas. Oh Rich brought a case of booze! And y’all say Rich is worthless.
Bravo did a great job with the bus. Everyone needs a bus with a stripper pole, it is over a three-hour trip to the lake. Melissa may have made an excellent point. Maybe the reason that Teresa hates Melissa so much isn’t because she is overly attached to her brother as I have previously thought. It’s the fact that in her eyes, her brother Joe is a great guy and she is jealous that Melissa who she was never fond of to start with has a great marriage, and Teresa has a lying, cheating scumbag. See? I am learning stuff from this Retreat by Bravo already.
I was looking forward to the three-hour bus ride with everyone on the very large bus but it appears that Teresa and Joe are riding up alone. You know Teresa had to make that a demand because Bravo would have loved six hours of bus footage.
Cute scene with Caroline and Albert.
Scene with Jacqueline and the prop child.
Who knocks on the entrance to a hotel? Joe Gorga does a great job walking in and kissing his sister and saying “what’s up?” Juicy Joe.
Everyone settles in and it is apparently hot in the “castle” but Juicy Joe and Teresa are both still in their coats chatting on the couch. Juicy Joe points out that autism is not such a bad disease and that some of them are, like, scientists. Which is pretty much true and possibly the most profound line Juicy Joe has ever delivered in a New Jersey guy kind of way. Teresa says he doesn’t understand autism and then apologies for him in her talking head basically saying he’s not mean, he’s just stupid.
OH DEAR GOD. Dr. V is coming. After taking a minute to process, Dr. V may just what they need. Meanwhile, I hate “team builders” and jobs that require people to play games with colleagues and each time I hear those words I throw up a little bit in my mouth.
I already want to punch Steve in the mouth. I can only imagine what the Joes are feeling. Jesus, Teresa why bring up Jaqueline? Don’t you have enough bad relationships in the room? I am so not in the mood for all these grown folks bitching about the same things from two years ago.
Joe calls Teresa scum and it’s time for the Joe throw downs. I am not entertained. I do happen to know that the fight was not scripted at least between the Joes.
Oddly, the only interesting things said all night were from Rich. First, he pointed out that Jacqueline’s tweets did not mention names just ‘moron’ which Teresa assumed was about her. And then when Juicy Joe came in, Rich peed his pants and yelled. Back up! Back up. Between those two comments and Juicy Joe’s intellectual look on autism that was pretty much all there was to see.