RHOM Reunion Finale Recap

SIGH. WordPress ate my first paragraph. And the photo. I honestly can’t even remember what it was about. Stupid WordPress. Oh I remember Lea jumping up and yelling at Ana about some minor bit of nothing. Lea loved to jump up and point her finger at Ana a lot this episode.

RHOMreunionsmallLots of boring hashing out of the slap between Adriana and Joanna at Lisa’s party. Andy asks Adriana why she keeps calling Joanna a call girl. My guess would be because she is, but Adriana tries to say that she doesn’t but Joanna jumps in to point out that those call girl website just used her photo without permission. Joanna also says that people should not belittle her for her tickle fetish videos. Lea tries to jump and say if you wouldn’t make an allegation under oath then you shouldn’t say it. It was a weird out of place interjection.  Good Lord Lea’s voice is schreechy. Ana says that Lea brought Joe Francis to the party specifically to humiliate Joanna and her sister. Duh!  However, Lea jumps up off the couch again screaming at Ana about lies and character assasination and demands truth serum and says she will swear under oath that she did not know Joe was planning anything untoward. Ana says the show is not called The Old and the Restless and makes more age jokes at Lea’s expense.

Alexia is out on the couch. Andy mentions that Alexia chose not to be a full-time housewife because of her son’s accident. Alexia talks about Frankie’s accident saying that he was not expected to live, and later he was expected to be in a vegetative state for the rest of his life, however he has made tremendous progress and can now walk and talk and feed himself. Alexia planning to try to get him back into school in January. Lots of tears. Andy brings up Peter getting arrested and asks about what happened. Alexia begins by saying that Peter is an introvert who had a very difficult time coping with Frankie’s accident. Alexia tries to avoid saying what Peter did and Andy points out that Peter hit a homeless man. Alexia says what her son did was wrong and she does not condone it Alexia breaks down sobbing. Marysol is sobbing. Alexia doesn’t want to talk about it so of course, Andy starts rattling off viewer questions on the subject.

The first viewer question is about why Peter pled ‘not guilty’ despite the fact that he taped the entire thing and put it on Youtube.  Alexia says she can’t really answer for the Peter regarding the legal decisions he made and she begins to rattle off his sentencing which is basically community service. We are spending way too much time on this.

RHOMKarentRodolfoI’m bored. I think we are talking about Karent. Everyone is giving stories of their take on the Rodolpho storyline. Alexia seems particularly angry with  Karent. Andy is going in on Alexia. Now he is asking what Alexia thought about the allegations that Herman is gay. Now Ana says that everyone in Miami thinks Rodolpho is gay. Lea keeps making weird legal analogies and talking about throwing a skunk in the jury room. Lea is talking about Marysol’s relationship being fake. Andy asks if Lisa was a dancer or a stripper when she lived in Vegas. Lisa says of course not. Lisa was in Playboy and she regrets it. Joanna jumps in to say she has two covers on Playboy and she is very proud of them.

RHOMMAMACantthinkCantseeIt’s time for Mama Elsa. Andy is gushing as he introduces her reel. Mama Elsa says that is Joanna is a fresh young woman with no manners. Elsa says she likes Lea but when she started to beat down Marysol, that hurt me. Mama Elsa says she no longer associates with Thomas and the he never apologized. Andy asks about Elsa’s facial surgery. Elsa says she would like to get it fixed but is afraid to have more surgery. Andy asks why Elsa called Obama and animal. Elsa says she didn’t. She says why would she do that? And that she loves Michele Obama. Mama says she never calls anyone an animal except her husband. Elsa is divorcing her husband and likes intelligent men.

The replay the flower ceremony from the end of the season. Ana is crying after watching the divorce scenes. Andy says it seems like she is still in love with him, Ana says not “in love” but that she will always be very close with him. Marysol says she is putting her divorce behind her. Adriana is “probably” getting married in the spring. Joanna says she is planning her fairytale wedding. Lisa is continuing to try to have children. Karent is doing the single life one day at a time.  Andy asks Lea what her predictions for the group are. Lea says she treats people better than they treat her. Lea is fake crying. It’s pretty funny.

That’s a wrap. I think part one was better than part two. What did y’all think?


Filed under Ana Quincoces, Elsa Patton, Filming Real Housewives of Miami, Joanna Krupa, Lea Black, Mama Elsa, Marysol Patton, Real Housewives of Miami, RHOM

53 responses to “RHOM Reunion Finale Recap

  1. michelle

    Boring, but Lea’s acting was very entertaining! I love Ana.

    • Buck Henry

      The reason Joanna Audriana and others call you an escort is because you where one. Your little excuse of saying that the escort agency used a picture of you is silly. For one, If that is the case then then the other girls are just as fake too and they where just as famous if not more so in their field of porn and lingere modeling. So you where the only fake and the rest where real. Number two, this escort agency wasn’t no 120 dollar a half an hour adult service. It had a website that showed the girls that where overt or not hiding their faces and the VIP girls or UTR where held on servers in another country. And somebody who was a member or didn’t like you did a screen shot of the whole page and it showed everyone from you to Jesse Jane (pornstar) to other models here and abroad. No man paying 10,000 or more a night or agency saying that these are the girls would use your service or stay in business a weekend if the girls that where shown aren’t the girls that come to his door. When a man picks Jesse Jane he knows he will get Jesse Jane pure and simple and if not he’s not paying or will complain and not pay. And if they want Joanna they will be waiting for her and pay.

  2. smooches

    Ana annoyed me per usual…the age attacks were a bore…I don’t want them back for another season *yawn*

  3. This episode reminded me of something I did not like in the first season. Alexia let her underage son drink. It was questioned at the time and she defended it. I wonder if she regrets that or realizes yet that maybe it was inappropriate. Granted, I don’t know the whole story and Peter could just be one of those people who have a lifelong demon in alcohols. I feel horrible for the family either way. But it made up my mind that I won’t condone it with my kid.

  4. lish

    I just have to say I could not stomach Alexia season one and can’t stand her now. I try not to hold her sons actions against her. But I think her son was raised to think he is better than a homeless man and people economically below them are free to abuse. Does anybody else see this in her? Thanks Tamra for great entertainment. So much more fun here than the blogs that kiss all the housewives asses!

  5. SJRedneck

    Alexia’s son loves the homeless so much he videotaped the beating and posted it on youtube . I think she tried to imply it was his way of dealing with his brothers accident?? Also a yawn dont care if this show returns. They are really just a bunch of rich people living the good life and after a season or 2 in this case its enough.

    • The whole Housewives franchise was founded on rich people living the good life and behaving badly. You don’t have to watch if you don’t like it. I love it and I hope they renew. It’s not like canceling Miami is going to make them replace the show with something better. If they HAD something better, there are plenty of places to add a show. These shows have to be dirt cheap to produce. They bring in tons of ad revenue, sponsorship and product placement revenue/trade for services. It’s a gold mine.

      • I agree teecee66. I love it too. Fun entertainment and greater fun to tear them apart (the nasty ones like Lea!) It’s fun harmless entertainment and you can escape for an hour once or twice a week.

      • puravidacostarica

        Besides, would anyone really want to watch poor people living the god-awful life and behaving badly? No offense to anyone who makes less than $400,000 individually or $450,000 jointly or as a family. :-)

      • puravidacostarica

        And, no haters please on the “poor” reference. In case I wasn’t clear, it…was…a….joke.

      • Honey boo boo. Roseann. I think extremes may be interesting to us? Of “the other half” half are lower and half are higher. But they all have different lives than I o and it’s interesting.

      • Iced Tea

        They do love it…Ever heard of Honey Boo Boo? LOL

  6. Che

    I love that you post immediately a recap and your opinions right after the show airs.

    anyways. I agree the first part was better then the second and I do like mama elsa. she seemed especially sober tonight, no slur in speech at all. Although at times the way she was positioned on the couch reminded me of a bottle head with a small body and very large head.

    and I was sooo over the lawyerly terminology. You are on the Reunion show of RHOM okay, not taking an oath to tell the truth in front of jury blah blah. and Lea would not own up to her wrong doings and even though they showed her talking smack, none of her knew followers would turn on her.

  7. I felt let down with Part 2.. Part 1 had me on the edge of my seat the entire time. I had so much to ponder and after reading TT your blog that first time I went out and researched and even signed up and got on Twitter for the first time ever! Even had a few exchanges with Ana Qook! Too fun and exciting. I commented on the Bravo RHWOM for the first time too. Lots of trolls on that and they had a nasty comment after every nice comment about Ana. I finally called them all out as being on Leas staff! Had a lot of fun in other words. Tonight was a huge let down. Thought Andy was a bit of a turd, still don’t get why people absolutely loathe Alexia, and Lea oh God every time she opened her pie hole I wanted to punch her in the throat. Kidding I am not violent but that phony baloney hurt my head with that voice and her patronizing pious words along withe fake tremor in her voice and that bs hurt my stomache as it clenched with disgust. This chick is unreal. I think I feel as repulsed by her as I have with Jill Zarin. Both of them have this egomania thing going on in their self centered almost sociopathic desire to rule the show and be number one, preferebaly with their name in the title. Okay sandy enough ranting already.

    • puravidacostarica

      I’m with you. Can’t stand Lea (bet she stole that “skunk in the jury box” line from her lawyer husband). Think Alexia has gotten a bad rap (and I for one loved her look tonight and am green with envy). The one who triggers my gag reflex the most is KarenT. She is a famemonger who is like Danielle on Big Brother — probably practiced that smile for hours in a mirror before, despite her mother’s warnings, it stuck like glue. Ugh.

  8. Kinito

    Sorry T. Normally I love reading your recaps, but you phoned this one in.

  9. puravidacostarica

    No truer words ever spoken by Andy — we love us some Mama Elsa! “I gonna hit you with my pocketbook” is my new catch phrase. But it might be replaced by “I’m not talking to you Number 3!!”

  10. I’m not talking to you, number three. Was the line of the show. I’m a fucktard for not highlighting it in my half-hearted recrap.

    • Ms Urethra Franklin

      My favorite line of both reunions. I am obsessed with Mama Elsa. I just adore her, …..and now whenever I’m talking to some annoying bleh lady, I am gonna refer to her as #3…#3 should be added to the urban dictionary.

  11. puravidacostarica

    Fucktard is rather harsh, Tamara. How about tired and a little worn out after the Kim house crapola you had to endure? Oh, please, I just heard KarenT say something about “keep on smiling”. Oh, puh-leeze, can someone hand me a set of pliers, plop in a DVD of Marathon Man, and strap both Lea and KarenT to adjoining chairs while I question them in a very poor German accent?? “Eeeef you fake-cry one more time, Madam Lea, you vil lose a teet or a tooth — your choiz”.

  12. Bella

    I must be the only one who finds mama elsa annoying…I don’t know why exactly…she just annoys the crap out of me.

    I like Ana but the old jokes to lea were just stupid. She’s no spring chicken herself.

    Everytime lea stood up I kept thinking bitch sit down lol. I think she has a lot of skeletons in her closet. The ones who act high and mighty always have the most to hide.

  13. LeeC

    I can’t believe no one told Lea to sit her ass back down on the couch. She seemed to think she was delivering a monologue in a courtroom every time she opened her mouth. Lea-you are not a lawyer!

  14. I still think Lea’s dress was too tight for her to speak sitting down. So she had to jump up to really belt out her lines.

    And Andy should fire Ana, pronto. She knows she has no storyline, so she argued her ass off with everyone, trying to insert herself into their dramas. Her fake ass “crying” over her ex-husband made me nauseous.

    I thought Andy’s dismissal of Alexia was kind of harsh. Did that mean she is gone from the show? He said goodbye to her and then she was off the couch for the rest of the show.

    I know it takes a lot of energy to blog these shows—-I recapped a three-hour Big Brother After Dark show EVERY DAY during Big Brother last summer. Trust that we all appreciate what you do even though it feels like a thankless job sometimes…

  15. Although I feel sorry for what Alexis is going through I have no sympathy for her son Peter. She almost had me feeling sorry for him until she said he “loved homeless people” She says is is an introvert and hasn’t been the same since his younger brothers accident. Well I just to get back on the computer and take a look at his facebook. All you have to do is go to the photo section and look to see just how ‘un-introverted’ he is. He is a typical 20 something living at home who’s interests are rap music, guns, smoking dope and just all around partying. The difference is he committed an adult crime. I think the prosecutor is stretching by calling it a hate crime instead of just an assault, I’m guessing that is what he will plea down to when all is said and done. It’s terrible what Alexis is going through with her younger son Frankie but she needs to let her older son do his time now instead of him doing a lot more time later, or worse things could happen if she keeps making excuses for him.

  16. WD

    Leah was one of my favs season one and she has taken a left turn for me. She too aware of the camera now and seems to be trying to multiple her personality. Whoa my little pony!

    I’ll be back next season…just like I am every other franchise.

  17. vp

    This recap is GRATUITOUS.


  18. bitchesbecrazy

    Hey Tamara, I just read somewhere that Adriana and Frederic have been married for four years….their marriage license is online.Can you please confirm.I really don’t believe anything until I’ve read it here first,but if it’s true, why would she lie???

  19. Well, if you read it somewhere, it must be true! :) Perhaps she got cold feet and annuled it? Who knows really…They live together with a kid and have for awhile so doesn’t seem to matter either way. Could be just storyline. /shrugs In case you haven’t heard, sometimes producers assign storylines that are not in fact reality! :) Shocking, I know.

  20. Oh come aaaaawn… What a cop out! He punched a homeless guy because he was so distraught? Stupid. It’s getting harder to feel bad for someone who’s trying to exploit my sympathy in the most transparent way. Her son is a privileged rich kid in Miami, which I assume is a city where you’re either the haves or have-nots, and he pulled a YouTube stunt that’s been done a million times. ‘Cept this one included assaulting another person that was probably older and not in great health.

    And I bet he still gets a four figure allowance and a car.

    • I don’t think she cares about your sympathy. Not a bit. And I don’t think it’s a big covert cover up. I think she’s acting the way any mother who loves her kids might act. Maybe she is fooling herself into thinking he is a victim. And maybe she’d be better off taking a hard line with him and making him get help and face his actions. Who knows. Maybe she has. But I have full sympathy for her because don’t think she is doing anything for fame or the cameras. I don’t think she puts her own ambition ahead of her kids like so many on these shows do. She is doing the best she can in an un fathomable difficult set of circumstances.

      • She doesn’t know me personally, so of course she doesn’t care. But, she definitely knows that anyone with a heart can sympathize with her situation and she used that pass and tried to downplay her son’s guilt. Any mother is going to be protective of her child, but there’s a limit. I like her, so I was disappointed when she didn’t just say, “Yeah, it is what it is and he’s definitely guilty. It was disgusting and cruel and we’re dealing with privately.”

  21. I enjoyed the 2nd part of the RHOM Reunion more than the 1st part, a lot less screaming. It was good to see Mama Elsa, I get a kick out of her. I hope next season they dump Lisa, there is no reason for her to be on the show. She looks like a Barbie Doll and is about as interesting as one. I always liked Ana but was surprised to see her so suddenly out spoken on the reunion shows. Maybe she is trying to assure her return next season. I imagine Alexia’s son pled “not guilty” on his lawyers advice. Lea and Ana should have known that. Can’t wait for next weeks lost footage episode. This is quickly becoming my favorite HW show.

  22. lori

    Am I the.only one who cannot STAND Alexia!?!? Ugh, she makes me so sick! How dare her make excuses for why her son HIT an innocent sleeping homeless.man. How her son was going through a lot, blah blah blah. LADY… I’ll bet you a million bucks that your son’s worse day is probably better them that homeless man’s best day. Honestly, i cannot imagine picking on a worse victim! And how she avoids the question by turning it back to her other son and bringing on the waterworks, and then saying how she doesn’t want to talk about it. I bet you don’t! With his mother making excuses for him, I find it doubtful that this spoiled brat will ever change. He is a bad seed doing something like that… seriously.

    • I seriously doubt you have a million dollars to bet. “How dare her” indeed. And since when are homeless people sainted?? You sound like you have some facts on the homeless person he hit. If so, do tell.

  23. FGF

    I love Mama Elsa!!! She definitely brings the humor to the show. I can’t remember who it was but I almost threw something at the tv when someone asked how old she is!!

    It did kind of hurt my heart when I saw the pictures Tamara posted of her in her younger years. She was soooo beautiful!!

    • DJ

      I think it was Lisa who asked about Elsa’s age, but it was only because they were talking about whether or not it would be safe for her to have corrective surgery on her face at her age.

      • FGF

        Thanks!! That makes perfect sense!! It probably wouldn’t be safe at her age but I sure wish someone could help her!

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