Monthly Archives: April 2012

Celebrity Apprentice: I Hate Aubrey O’Day

I have a confession to make. I haven’t been watching Bravo on Sunday nights since Celebrity Apprentice started. My Sunday nights are reserved for The Amazing Race and Celebrity Apprentice. Last night both shows took some time to highlight women behaving badly. I could rant on that, but I’d rather rant about how much I hate Aubrey O’Day.

Hate is a strong word. It’s also a very accurate description of how I feel about Aubrey. If there is a word that goes beyond hate,  that too would be appropriate. The term ‘hater’ has made its way into the lexicon of Internet users and other seedy realms lately as a term that intertwined with jealousy. ‘Hater’ has become a term people use to dismiss the validity of disliking someone by shrieking that the person doing the disliking is in some way jealous of the person with the vile behavior. For example, many times while watching the Real Housewives, I’ve suggested that nearly all of them, except Phaedra, need to buy a decent bra. When this suggestion is made about Nene a certain element of Nene fans comes screaming into comments to call me a ‘hater’ and suggest that I am jealous of Nene.  In fact, I don’t particularly have feelings for Nene as a person one way or another. She does lots of things that are impressive like getting legitimate acting roles and she does a lot of things that are reprehensible. So to be clear, this feeling I have for Aubrey O’Day is pure, unadulterated hate, not to be confused with disliking someone on  a reality show.

I knew that I was going to be driven out of my mind by this moron when she used the word ‘creative’ as a noun with the first two minutes of the show. Traditionally, the word ‘creative’ is an adjective. While it is used in the advertising field as a noun, it’s a disputed usage that most find ridiculous. It’s the type of word people say when they are attempting so sound educated. In other words, it’s something Sheree might say. And it irks me. And she says it at least a dozen times per episode. And she doesn’t consistently use it correctly as advertising jargon. It seems as though Aubrey learned the term on a Word of the Day calendar (advertising jargon edition) in an effort to appear intelligent. And it has worked. At least when it comes to Lisa Lampanelli who thinks that Aubrey should be welcomed to the next MENSA meeting.

If you don’t watch Celebrity Apprentice, chances are good that you are wondering who the hell Aubrey O’Day is and how she got on the show. I have no answer for either really. A few years back P.Puff.Diddy.Daddy got a show on MTV where he was supposed to put together a girl band. The band was eventually formed and named Danity Kane they has a one hit wonder then broke up. The majority of that show focused everyone’s hatred of Aubrey. On last night’s episode of Celebrity Apprentice, we found out that Trump didn’t even know that Aubrey sang. The teams were asked to make a jingle and Trump pointed out that the team with Clay Aiken on it had an advantage because he was a professional singer. When Arsenio pointed out that Aubrey was a singer as well, Trump replied that most people just think of her as being in Playboy. It was, without doubt, the best thing Trump has ever said on TV.

Last night Aubrey managed to suggest that Arsenio Hall is a gay, or at least a cross-dresser, while working for her charity GLSEN, which is a foundation whose mission is to eliminate bullying directed toward gays, and well probably cross-dressers too.  She had to know this because she gave a supportive interview about the charity where she said something like “I’m trying to help those poor unfortunate gays because, like, lately a whole bunch of them have been killing themselves and that makes me sad.” When Arsenio dared to question Aubrey’s brilliant idea that since the company had a mascot, then a cheerleader theme was the way to go Aubrey told the cameras, “Arsenio is the biggest girl on this show, so I don’t know why he doesn’t like tap dancing or wearing cheerleading outfits. We all know he does it at home.” Sadly, Arsenio was stuck in the unfortunate position of having to let Aubrey do her thing or risk Trump saying he didn’t listen to the “musician” so he allowed Aubrey to don a slutty cheerleader outfit and bounce around without putting up much of a fight. That didn’t stop Aubrey from constantly insulting him to anyone who would listen, from Teresa to Don Jr. At one point she told the camera  that maybe “he has become senile and is suffering from the age he has become.” Arsenio is fifty-six. I looked it up and was surprised because he seems younger to me. Let us all hope Aubrey never has to suffer from the atrocities of reaching that age.

So Aubrey changed the entire choreography and structure of the jingle and placed herself right in the center bouncing all about. She should have been thrilled. But when Don Jr. showed up she pulled him aside to explain that she was the only person “with any creative”  and if it weren’t for her “there wouldn’t be creative at all” and that her teammates were imbeciles and horrid, horrid people. After the presentation she told the camera that Arsenio and Teresa sucked (they were fine) and that it’s hard to deal with other people not being good at things like she is. Despite all of that, Arsenio
I am spending the week praying to the TV gods that Trump goes back to men against women for the remainder of the season and that it somehow comes down to Arsenio and Clay with an Arsenio win. Because in case I didn’t make it crystal clear, I hate Aubrey O’Day.  That little quote in the box there is one of Aubrey’s favorite things to say (as if she created it of course) in interviews when asked about why everyone in Making the Band hated her. So at least she owns being a self-important twat. Meanwhile, I’m taking a shot next week every time she says the word ‘creative’. It’s the only way to keep my head from exploding.

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Filed under Aubrey O'Day, Celebrity Apprentice, Teresa Giudice

What’s Wrong With This Picture? Kimnye

Remember those um, crusty leather pants that Kim K did her walk of shame in the morning after doing the do with Kayne?  Apparently, she wore them on the plane to the White House Correspondents Dinner this weekend AND wore them out to dinner with Kayne as well. She really seems to like those pants. Kim isn’t the only one who has problems keeping her black leather pants on these days. WTF?

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Filed under Dumbasses, Kim K, Kim Kardashian

Whale Wars: Worst Reality Show EVER

UPDATE 1/8/2012: TMZ is reporting that Paul Watson, has resigned from the Sea Shepherd Conservation Society due to numerous lawsuits against him. The lastest one being reported by TMZ alleges that Watson destroyed and sank on of the major ships on the show and blamed the Japanese in order to gain sympathy and financial donations for the society.

I’ve been stewing on a post since Friday night that I know y’all probably don’t care about but I have to get it written so I can stop stewing about it. This morning I had some really nice comments in the million views thread (I got a million views y’all! woohoo!) sayin’ how nice I am and how I’m not mean and angry. Clearly they’ve never seen me play whack a troll in the comments when I have PMS. I can be mean, but I’m rarely angry. Watching Whale Wars in the wee hours of Saturday morning got me heated though. So I’m just gonna say what I have to say about it and y’all can read it or not, and then I’m gonna get productive up in this ghetto shack of mine. I’m also going to suggest certain human populations be exterminated. I hope this doesn’t ruin my stellar reputation.

In the interest of full disclosure, let me start by saying I was raised in Tripoli, Libya. That’s relevant because the episode of Whale Wars I saw was filmed in Libyan waters. That right there got me mad. But let me back up and explain this damn show.  There is this Canookian Canadian dude name Paul Watson. He’s a terrorist.  He has this big black ship that he fills up with misguided people who want to save the whales, or in the case of this episode, the bluefin tuna. Now there is nothing wrong with saving the whales, or the bluefin tuna either if that is what your mission in life is. However, rather than getting the rights to a sad Sarah McLachlan ballad and running ads on TV bring awareness to the “problem” Watson decided to fill up a black ship with a bunch of people wearing black clothes, and fly a black flag with a skull and a hook and a pitchfork on it and sail around to a bunch of places and terrorize fishermen.

Continue reading

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Filed under Dumbasses

One Million Page Views!

Tamara Tattles hasn’t even reached our 6 month birthday yet, but sometime last night we hit a million views!  Thanks so much for reading, commenting, complimenting, encouraging  and supporting this crazy idea of mine. A special thanks to all the great sites that link to Tamara Tattles and to individual posts. I’m so afraid of forgetting someone that I’m not even going to try to list you all. Also a special thanks to those of you who comment everyday and let me know someone is reading and to my friends on twitter who retweet me often and to those of you who link to me in discussion forums. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
 

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Filed under Uncategorized

Brandi Glanville is a Housewife on RHOBH Season Three

Radar Online is reporting some good news for Brandi Glanville today. I tend to give ROL more Internet cred since their free advertisement on the RHOBH reunion show. I was excited and hopeful that Brandi would be “promoted” to a full-fledged housewife. She earned it last season.  Pam, on the other hand it seems will not be on at all. Shockingly, there will be no grand wedding in a European castle for Pam either. It’s almost like it was all a big lie…
They are also confirming that Yolanda Foster will be a new housewife on RHOBH. That makes two housewives that got married on 11-11-11!  I’m still not convinced we know everything there is to know about Lisa Vanderpump and Adrienne Maloof’s status for next season.  If they are both on, I don’t foresee them filming together very intimately, but that’s just me.  Also, that would make for more housewives than we’ve ever had before. There is someone else leaving I think. Thoughts?

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Filed under Adrienne Maloof, Brandi Glanville, Lisa Vanderpump, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, RHOBH, Yolanda Foster

Don’t Be Tardy for the Wedding Premieres With Big Numbers!

There was a whole lot of tweeting going on last night during Tardy For the Wedding. It was lots of fun for me to watch because I started this blog just a week before the wedding and was shocked that people were sending me information almost from day one. At that same time, Kim Kardashian was in town and I was getting bits of info on that too. As someone brand new to blogging, it was hard to keep my Kims straight which is why at the last minute I was totally unsure where Kim was getting married despite having the information. It was so exciting.  Now I am anxiously awaiting the ratings from last night so I can just see how many of y’all that said you weren’t going to watch were lying. :)
FINALLY! Ratings are in and they are fantastic! 1.399 (.5 18-49) for 9pm and 1.670 (.7 18-49) for 9:30!  Why aren’t you people watching Kathy at 10? She only pulled .726 :( Is it because you are addicted to Scandal on ABC like me?  Congrats Kim!

The question I got the most was about the cops showing up to the wedding. Well, Kim’s parents have been sort of …um… unusual on RHOA and her over the top mother has a big role in Tardy. Everyone’s mother can be a bit intrusive during the wedding planning. Juggling the parents of both bride and groom is part of the whole ordeal, but when you are …er….um…let’s say when a daughter has new money, and the mother is unaccustomed to ginormous reality TV weddings, expect the unexpected. Kim’s mom is not exactly Kris Jenner. So sadly, the po-po is called on her by security during the reception.  Sorry to spoil the ending, but… keep your eye on Kim’s mom.

I didn’t understand the whole secretive hotel room scene with the Pnina Tornai dress. Kim went to the New York debut of the line and sat in the front row with Colin Cowie.  It was not some big behind closed doors thing.  Also, Kim is 5’8″.  I have to get on the team that doesn’t believe she is a size two. I’m 5’9″ and even at 125 I was a 7 or a 9 and was bony.  Perhaps they have changed the sizes since the dark ages, but I also have huge (real. real saggy) boobs and … well there just ain’t no way. I realize they had to alter the boobs, but still. That said, we get to see a different side of Kim on this show. We also get to see more Kroy. I like Kroy well enough but he is not my physical type. I don’t understand all the hoopla there.  He seems to have a good heart and an easy going personality. I loved Shun the stylist ( follow @shunmelson ) and the loyal friend, Jen (expect drama between Jen and Kim though) and of course KJ is stealing the show.  I expect the ratings of this show to get better each week. Next week it moves to the 9:30 time slot.  The first two shows will air immediately before starting at 8:30.  After that the previous weeks show will air at 9:00 with the new one airing at 9:30.  So the 8 episodes will roll out over seven weeks.

So let me have it. What did you think of the show? Or just rant about how you didn’t watch it because Kim is a big, fat, whore. Either way works for me.

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Filed under Filming in Atlanta, Kim Biermann, Kim Zolciak, Kim Zolciak's House, Kim Zolciak's Wedding, Kim Zolciak's Wedding Dress, Kroy Biermann, Real Housewives of Atlanta, RHOA

What’s Wrong With This Picture? Taylor Armstrong

Taylor Armstrong was filming for RHOBH yesterday. Thoughts?

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Filed under Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, RHOBH, Taylor Armstrong, What's Wrong With This Picture?